I hate you, you hate me let's keep it that way
by lovsummergirl94
Summary: Bella hates Edward. Edward hates Bella. Or does he? Too bad he's her annoying, gorgeous boss....all human EXB
1. My Own Personal Demon

**I AM SOOOO SORRY FOR DELETING IT ONCE AGAIN! But there is a serious problem with this story!! Thank-you for all of you who did review it! I got it on my e-mail so thank you sooo much! The only problem is this time I can't reply to the reviews nor do they show up on fanfic, so once again I have re-put the story up if you could review again or something that would be cool so then I can reply to you personally!! =]]**

**Hey guys and girls! Thank-you all for the amazing reviews on my other story and as promised here is the new story! I am very sorry that I haven't updated sooner but now is better than never, right? Well, I know this sounds like a cliché story but just hold on. Also, it may seem like you're missing something at first but you shall find out by the end of the chapter…enjoy :)**

**Chapter 1: My Own Personal Demon**

**Bella POV**

My alarm clock blared at the not-so-decent-should-be-illegal time of 8 in the morning. A Friday morning. Ugh, not only is it a Friday but I have to wake-up at 8 in the freaking morning to go to work or as I like to call it hell in a corporate building—I work as an executive assistant to Red Ribbon industries owned by Mr. Carlisle Cullen; who is going to be retiring soon which leaves his wonderful company in the not so capable hands of his three sons. I probably should start preparing myself for hell to come; turning to see the other side of my bed, I found it empty. Again.

Well I might as well get up and go to work because if I'm even a second late Godzilla over there will have my ass. Stretching myself out, I got up and went to take a shower. A nice warm, stress relieving shower in the very silent apartment that I do not own, yet am forced to live in.

Getting out of the steam filled bathroom, I stood in front of my closet trying to decide what to wear to work today. If I have to get up this early then I should at least get some revenge and torture the bastard. I stared at my closet for about 15 minutes; I just couldn't decide what to wear!

In the end, I decided on a black pencil skirt with a tight royal blue blouse accompanied with 2 inch black heels. No matter what, _he_ promised to catch me when I fall so I'm not too worried about the heels, although I am the clumsiest personal in the continental U.S or maybe even the world!

I walked through the apartment and into the kitchen where I found breakfast already made for me and sitting on a silver platter; next to it there was a note from my _maid_:

_Eat up! I don't want you to be hungry on this beautiful—and I mean beautiful—Friday morning! You definitely can't be too tired for work, so you better eat your breakfast, sweetie pie. _

_~your dear and caring_—

I stopped reading the stupid little letter. A _maid_ is useless; I don't even know why I must have one. Can't people just leave me alone and let me live like a normal person in a normal city? Apparently not. As much as I didn't want to, I ate the food; a girl can be hungry without getting third degree, can't she?

My car hates me. It's official, my bad luck is spreading not only to my clumsiness and nature of falling—pun intended—into the most horrible situations but also to everything in my life. First my job, then my personal life, and now my precious, precious old rusty, red pick-up truck. It wasn't starting up, even after all the love I gave it through the years! In a psychotic attempt to get my car started, I begged my baby to start. Yea, that's right I was groveling in front of an inanimate object, waiting for it to start. Miracle of all miracles: my truck started! I was only going to be about 10 minutes late….shit!

"Hey _princess_ you're late! Are you trying to make my Eddiekins mad? Stop whoring around and get to work!"

"Fuck off, Lauren. Go make-out with your pillow or something just wishing it was 'your Eddiekins'."

Yea, that's my _best friend_ named Lauren Mallory. The slut of all sluts ladies and gentlemen! Ugh, I just wish I had crowbar and official permission to hit her over the head with it! Ever since I—sadly—got promoted to executive assistant to a _Mr. Edward Cullen_ she has been on my case. For some odd reason she thinks that I am in love with my boss! Psh, as if. Love is the furthest thing I have for him; hate is more like it. That man has been ruining my life ever since I started working for this company.

"Isabella, you're late. Now what in this world makes you think that you are allowed to wander on in at any moment you wish, Ms. Swan?" Idiot. Pig-head. Butt-face. Dumb ass. Asshole. Bastard. Son of a—

"Ms. Swan?" With that he quirked a perfect little bronze haired eyebrow at me.

"Nothing at all, _Mr. Cullen_. You see my _maid_ cooked breakfast for me this morning and left a charming little note. How could I say no? Besides not eating breakfast would break the contract I have with my, uh, _maid_. I do consider breakfast very important. Don't you agree?" This time I quirked my eyebrow at him, ha! Let's see what he has to say about that!

"Alright, I guess. Breakfast is the most important meal of the day but just make sure it doesn't happen again. And to insure that you will never be late I would like you to finish these three reports for me by, uh, let's say noon? Perfect, I shall see you then Ms. Swan." My jaw dropped at this. Noon?! How the hell am I supposed to finish three reports in three hours?! That would mean one report per hour and it usually takes me three hours to finish just one report! I hate Edward Cullen and his stupid bronze haired, green-eyed flawlessness! Hate it! Hate it! Hate it!

I snatched the reports from his desk and sped away from his office into my own, all the while having his annoyingly gorgeous emerald eyes watching me. Stupid hot boss. Wait, did I just think 'hot boss'?! Oh god I have to lighten up on the coffee. Plumping down into my super comfy desk chair, I looked at the reports. I should have more coffee in the morning. My office phone started ringing so I picked up; please don't be a squealing, super hyper in the morning pixie Alice.

"Belllaaa!!! How's hotty bossy working for you today?" Ugh, too late. You see, Alice is my best friend in the whole entire world and she has been since we were toddlers. She also seems to find it extremely funny that her boyfriend's brother just so happens to be my boss. He's also the most annoying prick on the block, but don't go telling her or Jasper—Alice's boyfriend—that, they'll think you're in love with him or something. That's what happens to me all the time; I mean really, every time I go over to their apartment to rant about him I get the Spanish inquisition on how much I like him or think he's hot. Which I don't because I don't think any of those things. Psh, why would I?!

"Bella? Honey, are you there? Look I know it's Friday and it's your 'no super hyper pixie morning day' but I just called to ask you something! First, are you there? Are you even listening to me?!" Oops, could I be more stupid?

"Sorry, I just kinda spaced out for a bit. Um, what do you need?" That brought her out of 'super hyper pixie land' and straight into 'super hyper very excited can't wait to do a Bella Barbie extravaganza pixie land'.

"Oh that's okay, if I had such a hotty bossy well then I would space out every single second of the day! Especially since he—

"Alice! Can you please just get to the point, I have work to do." I know that sounded rude but seriously I don't need this, as she put it, on my no pixie morning. We made that deal back in freshmen year of college when I had to study for finals yet Alice would bug me every morning and since Friday's are my relaxation days back then, we made a rule that she can't bother me on Friday, especially the morning.

"Jeez miss boss, well all I wanted to ask you was if you wanted to go to a club tonight! I mean, again, I know it's your no pixie day but it's been so long since we've gone to a club! Tonight just feels like the night! By the way, ask Edward too, I can't wait! Meet Jazzy and I at the usual club!" With that, she hung up. She didn't even wait for my answer! Some best friend, humph.

"Ms. Swan? You're here to do work, not to talk to friends over the phone. Remember I want those files done by noon."

"Wait! Um, that was Alice. She was wondering if you wanted to go to a club tonight, something about having never gone to a club in ages. Yea, she said that she'll see us at the usual place. I'll just get to work then." I made a dramatic show of taking out the files and beginning to look at them just to show that ass that I do come here to work. I'm not some trophy person that will stand around smiling like a crazy person. Said ass just continued staring at me as if he was fantasizing something about me. Oh no, my skirt rid up and my blouse rid down. Wow, can we all say slut?

"I'll be there, can't wait." Before he left the room he looked me up and down then smiled his crooked smile. Pervert. Whatever, I better start on these files.

How the hell does he expect me to complete these files by noon if he keeps poking his little head around the corner and asking, no demanding is more like it, me to go do some idiotic little thing for him?! It's already been an hour and half since he gave me the files which left me less than 2 hours to complete 2 and half files! Lucky for me, I got half way through the first one before he started bothering me. Just as I was about to finish off my first file, the annoying little prick poked his head out, again.

"Ms. Swan? I was wondering if you could do something for me." Wondering? Yea, right. I'll have to do whatever he asks of me, no complaints or it will get worse.

"What?" I put on my most sickly sweet voice.

"I would like some star bucks coffee but not the star bucks around the corner, I want the one that is all the way across town. Thank-you and I do hope you finish those reports by noon." What. The. Fuck?! Across town?! Does he think I'm wonder woman or something?! I'm doing the job that Lauren Bitch Mallory over at the reception desk should be doing! As executive assistant I'm supposed to be helping with files and company stuff, not running around getting him coffee! She's probably sitting at her desk right now filing away at her stupid nails all smug and thinking that she has to beautify herself for _Edward_ and that's why he gives me all the work. Oh please, like that man would ever look twice at her platinum blonde, colored contacted eyes, clothes too tight little body!

Without further a due I snatched the files up from my desk and ran down to catch the next subway across town. Maybe I can get some work done on the subway ride. I slid my card into the gate and rushed inside the train, taking a seat all the way in the back where no one else but a creepy, old homeless man was sleeping. Going through the files my mind was in a whirlwind, I only have an hour and half to finish all of this work and I still have to get his coffee; do you think I can poison it? Nah, who's going to pay the bills for me?

"Hey, sugar how ya doin'?" The creepy old dude started looking me up and down. Ew, gross. As my mother taught me, I ignored him and moved away.

"Where ya goin', honey? Come give a big kiss to daddy." He held his arms out to me and my heart beat frantically; yea, he's old enough to actually _be_my dad. Gross, I cannot believe I just thought that!

"Um no thank-you, please leave me alone." I moved away a bit farther but he only moved a bit closer to where I was sitting. Okay, calm down, there are other people on this train, he won't do anything. All my life I was always protected, I mean I did take self defense classes but with my clumsiness I don't think I would be able to fight off an attacker. I can try but just watch me trip and fall. Ugh, this is not the time to think of things like that.

"Hey, Bells, is this guy bothering you?" My savior! Wow, that sounded totally damsel in distress corny. But really, if Jake wasn't here I don't know what might have happened. Upon seeing me running over to Jake, the old creepy dude backed away and settled himself at the corner again.

"Oh my god, thank-you so much. If you weren't here I don't know what might have happened." I hugged one of my best friends in the whole wide world.

"No problemo, I'm always here for you Bells. Now, what are you doing on the subway? Don't you have work with 'hotty bossy'?" Jake is his own boss in a mechanic shop so he can take a break any time he wants. I, however, am famous for not being able to do anything except work while at work. Everyone knows that.

"I do have work with the prick but I have to get star bucks coffee from him and no he doesn't want it from the corner shop but from the one across town. So as his personal maid, I have to go get it for him." In response, Jake simply laughed at my situation; for some reason, all of my friends find it really funny how I am at his beck and call during work yet when—

"Why do you have all these files with you?" I have an idea; maybe I can get Jake to help me finish these files. All I have to do with them is read through and edit them and Jake is really good with that seeing as how he has helped me so much with it in the past. And since he used to be a business major before he dropped out of college to become a mechanic, he should have no problems helping me. With that idea in mind, I looked up at him with the cutest expression I could muster.

"Jakey, you know how you're my bestest friend in the whole wide world?" He rolled his eyes at me and said:

"What do you need help with?" I squealed in delight because he would help me and told him what I had to do. The rest of the ride Jake sat next to me doing half of the files while I worked on the other one and finally it came to my stop.

"Come on, Bells, I'll walk with you; don't want you to get caught up with strangers." He smirked at me, great he'll never let me live it down.

"Oh, shut-up! Anyways, you never did tell me what you're doing on the subway right now; shouldn't you be at the shop?"

"I should but the little pixie called me and told me that I should get on the next subway immediately and knowing that she'll take me shopping if I didn't comply I went. Glad I did too or who knows what trouble you could have gotten into." Times like this are when I feel so grateful to have friends like Jake and Alice. Although Alice does have this mysterious all-knowing power or something; somehow she almost always knows what's going to happen in the future that it's scary, but I've gotten used to it by now. Having lived with that pixie for 24 years of my life, I've gotten used to all of her antics.

"Well I'm glad too." I smiled warmly at him but he ruined the moment with the next words coming out of his mouth.

"Plus I'm pretty sure Edward would tear me to pieces limb from limb if something happened to you and I could have done something to prevent it. You know it is so funny how—

"Jake! Shut. It." See what I mean? All of my friends torture me this way, it's not fair! They're all on his side rather than mine.

After getting _his _coffee, I headed back to the office with Jake still by my side helping me with the files. The second miracle of today happened: Jacob and I finished all the files!!! Now Mr. Cullen has no excuse to yell at me and give me more work because I will be getting back to the office just before it hits noon! Wow, Jake sure does work fast.

"Looks like this is my stop. Thank-you so much for the escort and help, Jake! I don't know what I would ever do without you! Oh wait, I do know. _Mr. Cullen_ would kill me." Both of us laughed at my statement and I waved goodbye to him. Jake is a really good friend, unlike some other people I know.

I rushed into the office and headed up to the 40th floor where my office was and went straight into _his_ office.

"Ah, here you are Ms. Swan. I was beginning to wonder whether you fell of the face of this earth or not." Rolling my eyes, I held out his coffee to him.

"Here's your coffee from the star bucks across town; one mocha with a spoon of vanilla, two drops of sugar, shaken not stirred." He just shook his head at me.

"No thank-you. Since you were taking too long, I had Lauren get me coffee from the star bucks around the corner. You know, she was much nicer about it than you were." What. The. Hell?! I went all the way across town to get him his stupid coffee and now he tells me that he doesn't want it?! On the outside I was cool and calm but inside I'm fuming! I don't want him to have the satisfaction of my anger and pure hatred at this jerk. I swear I'm going to murder him one day!

"Fine. Do you have anything else for me to do?" My voice was clipped and emotionless.

"Yes, actually, I would like you to do some research for me. Please contact all of our clients and ask them where they are in their stories. That is all." Keeping the calm exterior I walked out of his office to just scream quietly in anger. He expects me to call ALL of our clients?! Since this is a major publishing company, the most famous one in the United States, we have thousands upon thousands of authors/clients working with us. This will take forever!

An hour and half later, I was only done contacting all of our clients through the first three pages out of about 1,000. Lovely.

"Ms. Swan, I would like to ask you for another favor. Please go grab David Clientele's file from the second floor. Thank-you."

"Yes, sir." Do I have a choice? He moved to leave when suddenly he turned back around.

"Oh by the way, take the stairs. The elevators are currently getting fixed." My mouth dropped open. The stairs?! Did I mention that we're on the 40th floor?! I kept my rage within me, complaining would only make it worse for me but I felt as if my body was literally trembling and _Mr. Cullen's_ smirk gave me proof of that.

Without further a due, I went toward the staircase and descended down 38 floors in treacherous heels that Alice bought for me, replacing all of my comfy shoes. I swear along with Alice and this idiot I'm going to drop dead one day! Snatching up the file from the drawer next someone's desk I raced back up to the 40th floor way out of breath.

"Got…the…file…for…you." I said between gasps of air filling my painfully aching lungs.

"Lovely, finally you have done something I ask of you, Ms. Swan. Now, I must ask of you another favor. Get me the file from Mrs. Cheney's desk." Okay, I'm already out of breath but another trip all the way down to the first floor this time?!

"Couldn't you have told me before when I was going to the second floor?!" This time his eyes looked sharply back into mine and a wide grin like the Cheshire cat in Alice in Wonderland wore.

"Ms. Swan, I'm shocked, is that a complaint I hear coming from you?" Oh no! One single complaint from me and I might as well be thrown to the dogs! It only gets worse when I complain! _Quick, Bella, think of something. Quick!_

"No! I was just, uh, wondering what kind of sense of timing that, um, you have! Yea, I'll just go get the file now." Running out to the staircases yet again, my cheeks were flamed with my almost ever-present blush. On my trip back I stumbled on the last step and fell just in time to see him walking out of his office. He looked panicked and concerned when he saw me on the floor but once I righted myself, his ever-present smirk came slithering onto his face once again.

"Your file." With that, I stormed into my office and continued working on 20 other files he had given me. Sometimes I wish I could just jump into another world and never have to worry about my current life.

"Belllaaa!!! Come on! I'm going to get you ready for the club! I already talked to Edward so get your cute little but over here!" Alice got rid of him for me?! She is a God sent! Even though she is going to play Bella Barbie with me…either way as long as I'm nowhere near him, I'm fine!

"Let's go!" Shock registered on her face at my words.

"What?! You're actually anxious to get a Bella make-over? This is a first and I must say that I quite like the new attitude." She didn't get it.

"No, it's not that. If I had the choice of getting a make-over from you or staying in this office to be treated like a slave and running up and down the stairs because the elevators are broken, then I choose the make-over." At this, Alice had a funny look on her face.

"What do you mean? The elevators aren't broken; I just came up on one." In the distance I heard my prick of a boss snickering a little. So, the elevators weren't broken. Taking deep breaths in and out, I followed Alice out to her car while still keeping my cool but once inside her car I grabbed the nearest pillow and screamed into it.

"Geez Bella, what's up with all this frustration? You know all you have to say is that magical little phrase and it will all end."

"No, Alice, why don't you guys understand?! I. Do. Not. Like. Edward. Cullen!" She simply looked at me with her mysterious Alice way.

"Are you sure you don't like him? Not even a little?"

"Alice, please. I don't like him. Not at all! You guys should seriously consider not blackmailing me anymore; I mean I already told you I don't like him so why must I go through torture everyday at work? Can't you ask Jasper to talk to him already? Please?" For extra affect, I gave her my special puppy dog eyes but in response she just rolled her eyes and concentrated on the rode.

"Oh please, Bella, don't give me the puppy dog look; I practically invented that! It will definitely not work on me. But, since you're so bent on saying that you don't like him then I will try and get Jasper to talk to him about lessening up on your work load. Okay?"

"Thank-you, that's all I ask."

We arrived at her house in record time and she dragged straight upstairs. It really is a big room: a king sized bed in the middle with a white canopy over it. The sheets a lovely shade of baby pink which matched with the walls. Decorative flower designs all over the walls. A door that led into a huge walk-in closet filled with designer clothing. And, to top it all off, a Broadway style vanity mirror combined with a huge desk covered in products. She calls it a bedroom; I call it a torture chamber. Go figure.

"What are you standing around for? Sit down before I physically tie you down onto this chair!" And she means it! So I immediately sat down, awaiting Alice's directions.

"So, uh, what are you going to do to me?" Might as well ask and get it over with.

"Well, let's see…" And she went off on a full length lecture using many product names that I don't know about. Forget I asked.

"…Finishing off with a light coat of clear lip-gloss to cover the lipstick and make it smoother and you're all ready! At least with make-up that is. Okay, let's get started!" And off she went!

I think about an hour later Alice was applying something she told me was called a light bronzer.

Half an hour later she told me that she was done and before I could look in the mirror, Alice started on my hair and pulled a dress over me.

Fifteen minutes after that, Alice declared me ready. I took a deep breath, turned around, and gasped at the image in front of the mirror. Not to brag or anything but I looked hot! My hair looked wild and had an out-of-bed style to it, I had eyeliner lining my eyes darkly so it brought out the brown, and I was wearing a rich green halter top, with thin straps, that contrasted nicely and was very short that it barely reached mid thigh! There was also a very pretty square diamond right where the straps met the top of the dress. My face looked really pretty, I barely recognized myself! I head a slightly maroon lipstick on that made my lips look very plump and what I call 'kissable'. All in all, I think I look AMAZING!

"Wow, Alice, it looks AMAZING!" She squealed in delight.

"Thanks! I can't wait to see Edward's reaction to it!" Yeah, me too. I wonder what 'Mr. Cool' would have to say about me looking like a sex kitten.

"I wonder too."

"Oh! I know what he'll say! It'll be something like: 'Bella, my new love! You look absolutely gorgeous! Please, let me worship you like the queen you are! Let me ravish you and buy thousands upon thousands of gifts! I promise never to bother you again; I shall be your slave! Forever, if need be! My goddess, what do you say?'" We both cracked up at Alice's eerily similar representation of him. She made her voice nice and deep that it almost sounded like him and she even got down on one knee and held her arms out to me! As Alice and I were still giggling, my cell phone started ringing.

"Hello?" I didn't even bother checking the caller id and I was still quietly giggling as I answered but as soon as the voice on the other end replied, I sincerely wished I had checked the id.

"Hello, since you left work early I just called to give you an assignment." It's _him_.

"What assignment?"

"You're about to find out. You know the 20 files that I had given you? Well I would like them completed and finished on my desk, Monday morning at 7. See you tonight." And he hung up. That bastard! Okay, I know that sounds completely obnoxious but it will take me the whole weekend to finish all of the files by Monday! Ugh! I hate him!

He's my torturer, my axe murderer, my devil, my own personal demon sent from hell, my _husband_…

**Hahahaha! You guys didn't think I'd write some cliché story, did you? I have to have some sort of twist…Anyways, like I said before I am sooooo sorry that I didn't put this chapter up earlier but I have been fighting a MAJOR case of writers block so yea. I hope you enjoyed it, review so I can continue! (That rhymes!) Or review and criticize me! I could really use the ego deflator, not really, but tell me what I should work on so you guys can enjoy my stories more! Or maybe even drop a review and tell me how much you liked it! That would be totally awesome!**

**Plus, if I get that many amazing reviews then I am definitely thinking a very hot, jealous Edward at a club…=]]]**


	2. How My Life Got Ruined

**Wow, thank-you all for the reviews! I am still yet amazed by those of you that love my writing! Thank you all sooo much! This chapter took me FOREVER to write but here you go! Enjoy :)**

**Chapter 2: How My Life Got Ruined**

Edward Cullen is in fact my husband. I wish he wasn't but sadly anything I say is mush because everyone else in this entire world is in love with him!

"Bella? Bella! Bella?! What's wrong with you?!!" Alice's voice interrupted my internal fuming.

"Who was it? You seem really angry." I hit anger ages ago, now I'm FURIOUS! I hate him! 20 files in one weekend?! I swear if I wasn't breaking the contract I would leave him right now; too bad I really like my job no matter how infuriating the boss can be. Okay, now you're probably wondering how this all started. Well, it started off with me graduating from college with a bachelor's in writing and looking for a job when suddenly Alice got Jasper to hook me up with a job in his dad's publishing company. My original job in this company was Mr. Carlisle Cullen's assistant editor. I wish I could go back to that, but of course I can't because I'm stuck with _Edward_.

I was extremely excited to have such a prestigious job with little to no effort on my part but nonetheless I felt very grateful that I studied as hard as I did in school. The only problem with my new job was that Carlisle's youngest son, Edward, always bothered me even though I technically wasn't working with him. If I had to do a job for Carlisle, Edward always came in and told me to do stuff and seeing how he's my boss's son I had to do what he said.

_Flashback_

_"Thank-you, Bella. I'm so sorry for giving you such a workload but with our publishing deadline coming up we really need to get all this done." Not that I'm mad at Carlisle but boy did he give me a workload! Currently it's Friday and Alice really wants me to finally meet her new boyfriend, Jasper, formally. He's Carlisle's middle son so I've met him before but Alice wants me to meet him officially as her boyfriend. The only problem is, Red Ribbon's publishing deadline is the coming Wednesday so all of us editors have a lot of work to do. Therefore, I have to finish editing 10 files this weekend; I guess it's not so bad. _

_"It's fine, Carlisle, I understand. I don't really have any plans this weekend except to meet Jasper officially as Alice's boyfriend, so I have plenty of time." He smiled a genuine, fatherly smile and told me that I could go home early today. Wow, he is the best boss ever! Although he is my first boss but so far from what I've seen on TV and movies, Carlisle is the best!_

_"Thank-you so much! Have a nice rest of the day and weekend! Oh by the way, can you please thank Esme for me? She sent me some of her lovely flowers to help decorate the old apartment and I'm just in love with the fragrance and beauty!"_

_"Of course, Bella. You have a good weekend too, if you can with all the work." I grinned at Carlisle and he smiled back as I left the office. _

_Heading to my rusty, red pick-up truck in the parking lot, I tripped. And just as I was about to hit the hard concrete, strong arms caught me. Mother of all pearls! It had to be the one person I don't ever want to see, speak to, or think about! _

_"You should be really careful, Ms. Swan. Don't want anything happening to our most precious editor, now do we?" Edward freaking Cullen! Shoving his arms off of me, I replied._

_"I'm fine, Mr. Cullen. Now if you don't mind, I'd like to get to my car." Before I could even take a step he blocked my way. _

_"Why are you leaving so early?" Why does he care? God! It's as if he stalks me or something, always asking me what I'm doing and why I'm doing then giving me another full workload besides the one I already have! And he's the only one that makes me call him 'Mr. Cullen', so annoying!_

_"Carlisle told me that I can leave early seeing as how I have to meet Alice at 7 and there is a full workload to do this weekend because of the publishing date. Now I really have to go, so if you'll excuse-me, good-bye." This time I physically pushed him out of my way and headed straight towards my car._

_"Oh, I see, okay then. Good-bye, see you tonight." I froze in my spot and whirled around. Tonight? How will he see me tonight?! I'm going to meet Alice and Jasper for dinner and he's not coming unless…oh no! That conniving little pixie! Ever since I started working for this company six months ago, Alice seems to think that Edward is in love with me and has always been trying to get us together because she and Jasper seem to make the perfect couple. In my opinion, I hate him, he hates me, and I hope to keep it that way. _

_"You know what? Whatever, fine, I'll see you tonight." With that, I stormed off. There's no need to give him the satisfaction of my outrage at this news. _

_As soon as I reached my apartment, I called Alice. How dare she try to set me up again?! _

_"Hello?" Oh look at her, trying to sound all innocent. _

_"Alice you invited _him _tonight?! How could you?!" _

_"I'm sorry, Bella! I didn't think you'd find out until tonight! I told Edward not to say anything, ugh that jerk! I'm sorry! But come on! You guys are like perfect for each other! Besides it's not only Edward, Emmett and Rose are coming too." At least she had the dignity to say sorry and actually sound it too and the thought of Emmett and Rose coming did make it better. Rosalie Hale is Emmett Cullen's wife and he is Carlisle's eldest son; I met them about a month ago and they're so awesome! Emmett is possible the funniest person you will ever meet and Rosalie is the most gorgeous! With her model like body and blonde hair, blue eyes she is by far the most beautiful girl on the planet but she is also one of the nicest. At first she was really rude but once I introduced myself and so forth she became really nice and even took part on one of Alice's shopping extravaganzas. Emmett, however, looks like a body-builder and looks scary at first but inside he's a little teddy bear and wouldn't hurt a fly. With them around Edward will at least tone down his rudeness toward me; I just don't get what's wrong with him! _

_"Alice, I'll still come because a promise is a promise but please don't do this again. Edward and I are NOT meant for each other! Why don't you get that?" _

_"Oh Bella! You just won't get it! Now shall I come over right now to get you ready? I know you're already at home, caller id, Bells!" Shoot! I forgot Alice wanted to Bella Barbie me for tonight, I didn't get why before but now I get it; she wants me to look good for Edward. Psh, as if I'd ever want to do that willingly. _

_"Um, it's okay, Alice. I'll get ready myself." I just threw myself to the sharks, denying Alice from dressing you up is NEVER something you want to do. _

_"Okay! Jazzy is here anyways, but I will look at your outfit for approval so NO SWEATS! We're going to a classy restaurant, Bella!" This reminds me, I don't even know where we're going!_

_"Alice, there's one teensy detail you forgot to tell me, where am I meeting you guys?" I could hear Alice giggling nervously, what did she do now?" _

_"Umm, well, huh, funny story Bella!" More nervous giggling…_

_"What did you do? Just spit it out, Alice. I promise I'll try my hardest not to be mad at you." _

_"Hahaha, well ummm, I kinda told Edward where you live and told him to pick you up at 6:45 today and he's going to be your date tonight because we're technically triple dating." She said all of that in a torrent of words that it took me a couple minutes to figure out what she said and when I did, I screamed so loudly that I swear I saw some of my stuff on the table shaking. _

_"You WHAT?! Alice this is way too much! I refuse to go on a date with Edward Cullen! You know how he treats me!" My body was visibly shaking with anger. _

_"Please Bella?! Come on I already told him to come! Please, you have to come! Please? Please? I promise I won't take you shopping for a whole month if you come tonight! Please?" I know I'm going to regret this decision but the thought of no shopping for a month is way too tempting and one night with Edward won't be so bad, right? I mean it's not like we're going to be alone. I don't even have to talk to him. I can do this._

_"Okay, fine, but I'm not happy about it!"_

_"Oh! Thank-you, Bella! You're the best!"_

_"I know." I smiled and said goodbye to Alice so I could get ready. It was already 5:00 so if I had any chance of getting ready I better start now; I'm going to need a nice, long hot shower to prepare myself for tonight. I never thought the day would come when I, Bella Swan, would go on a date with Edward Cullen. Even if it is a triple date sort-of thing the idea is still there. _

_After my shower, I checked the time to see that I had spent a whole hour in there trying to prepare myself mentally and trying to relax myself so I don't blow up at just the sight of him. _

_Now, time to decide what to wear. Should I heed Alice's words and wear something pretty or should I wear something that looks horrible on me just for Edward's benefit? I guess I should go with the pretty choice because otherwise Alice will kill me and make me strip right in the restaurant. She's done it before…Luckily that time I was wearing a petticoat but nonetheless that was one of the most embarrassing moments of my life. In the end, I decided on the classic little black dress with red pumps. Not wanting to go all out, I kept my make-up to a simple eyeliner and red lipstick. That should get me past Alice and, to my benefit, it's not all that flashy so it's not like I dressed up greatly for Edward._

_I finished just in time because as soon as I pulled my shoes on my doorbell rang. Here we go…_

_Opening the door, I found Edward dressed in a black dress shirt with khaki pants and black dress shoes. His bronze hair was in its' usual disarray and his green eyes shone with amusement, shock, and…lust? He held out an arrangement of wild flowers to me._

_"For you, m'lady." Oh please, trying to be all smooth, I don't buy it. _

_"Yeah, okay, let's get this show on the road." I took the flowers and placed them in a vase while he just stood in my living room looking at me with amusement in his eyes. _

_"After you." He held the door open for me and opened the passenger seat door for me. No matter how much I wish I didn't, I blushed and mumbled a 'thank-you' at his chivalrous gesture. What happened to the jerk side of Edward? It's as if he's Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. _

_The ride to wherever we were going was silent except for Edward humming some weird tune. Sad to admit but he has a good voice. Ugh, stupid velvet voice of his! When we finally got there, he once again opened my door for me and led me into the restaurant where I immediately spotted our table because of Emmett's huge size. _

_"Bella! Eddie! I was wondering where you two went off." I blushed at what Emmett was hinting at. The only thing that bothers me about my friends is that they all think Edward and I are destined for each other. I just don't see it! _

_All in all, the dinner wasn't so bad; Edward wasn't so bad, the occasional annoyingness but not as bad as work. I 'officially' met Jasper as Alice's boyfriend and we toasted to their lovely relationship. It's been six month since they were dating and they only decide to declare themselves boyfriend/girlfriend now. They're pretty slow. Emmett and Rosalie dated for a total of two months and three days before they decided to get married, but, hey, everyone's different. For example: me. I have not dated anyone since high school! Yea, I know that seems really sad but I just haven't found the perfect person that clicks with me. _

_Emmett stretched his arms and as he did so, his shirt rid up and I swear I saw duct tape under his shirt. I should call him out on it. _

_"Emmett, why are you wearing duct tape under your shirt?" At this, the Cullen boys and Rosalie started snickering. Alice and I looked at each other, wondering what we were missing. _

_"What?" Finally Jasper calmed down enough to tell us the reason of Emmett's horrible fashion choice. _

_"It's kind of a long story but here it goes. When we were younger, about 5, 4, and 3, dad and mom were hosting a business meeting. Us guys helped mom clean the whole house and stuff and when the time came for the party, she told us to stay upstairs because it was adults only. So of course if you put three little boys upstairs together there is definitely going to be chaos. We kinda created our own little world war three upstairs…" Before Jasper could continue, he had another laughing fit so Edward took over as narrator for him._

_"We were pretend fighting with our little toy guns when we got into a, uh, little disagreement. In the end, it turned into a bet. Jasper and I bet Emmett that he wouldn't be brave enough to go downstairs and pretend to play war with the adults there. Of course being Emmett, he took the bet and went downstairs. What Jasper and I didn't know was that he would put on a little show for the adults." He took a pause to laugh a little but continued on. _

_"He went downstairs, got everyone's attention and said in a mafia boss sort-of voice 'say hello to my little friend' and I'm sure you all can guess what he did. He pulled his pants down and showed everyone his 'little friend'." By now, Alice and I were close to falling off of our chairs from laughing. Edward even did a little mafia boss accent, it was hilarious! Emmett continued from there._

_"Yea, and then all the adults gasped and boy did I get a talking-to! Since then Esme made me put duct tape over my boxers as punishment and I just got used to it so I don't take it off. Having it on for a couple years mad me quite used it, it really is very comfortable. There are only a couple nights I don't have it on." At that he looked at Rose suggestively and we all continued laughing while Rose continued._

_"Oh please, he still doesn't stop at that! Every time we get intimate, he says 'say hello to my not so little friend' in his mafia boss accent!" I think the whole restaurant is looking at us from how much we're laughing! Rose even did her own imitation of the mafia boss accent! _

_A while later, Edward took me home and once again kept opening all of my doors for me. When we got to my apartment door, I turned to him awkwardly. What now? _

_"Umm, great story telling." Oh God, did I just say that?! He laughed in response and smirked at me. _

_"Thank-you, I'll see you at work on Monday. Make sure to finish all 15 of the files." He started walking away when I actually realized he said 15, not 10._

_"Wait! Carlisle only gave me 10, where did the extra five come from?" _

_"Oh, I e-mailed you five more. We really need to make the deadline." And he walked away before I could say anything. I hate him! _

_Before I even knew it, Alice wanted throw me a party for working at Red Ribbon for a whole year! Wow, time flies by! Alice and Rose were going to come over, dress me up, and then we were going to meet the boys at some bar for the celebration. Since Alice and Jasper were an item and continually wanted to hang with me, I got used to the idea of Edward going almost everywhere I went. It did get awkward for us when there were times that what we did were for couples but otherwise it wasn't that bad. Of course there were also insults here and there and little jibes but all in all it was okay. _

_Hours after Alice and Rose arrived we found ourselves finally at the bar. They took forever with my clothes and make-up. I was wearing a silvery, very tight dress that showed off a lot more than I liked but I had no choice. They also forced me into high heels and put a gallon of make-up on me. _

_"Girls!! Wow, you guys look hot!" Emmett greeted us as soon as we got inside, it was clear that he was drunk already. _

_"Come on! Join the fun!" I think all of them were tipsy. Jasper sounded that way and Edward looked it. For some reason he continued staring at me. Whatever. _

_"Bella, grab a drink and let's go dance!" Rose shoved a glass of tequila towards me and started pulling me towards the dance floor. It's a Friday night and I've been working my ass off all year to actually feel like I deserve this job, plus Edward hasn't exactly been easy on me. So I took the drink and went to dance. After that, the drinks kept coming and I kept dancing and having a blast! Being the smart, responsible person I only drank enough to get me a little tipsy not enough to get me fully drunk. _

_I was sitting at the bar when Edward came up to me._

_"Bella, you look pretty tonight." His words were slightly slurred but who cares?! He looked very good! Wait, what am I saying? I think the alcohol is trying to take over my body. _

_"Dance with me." Edward snatched my hand and led me to the dance floor before I could even reply. But as soon as his hands grabbed my hips and started dancing with me all thoughts of refusal left my brain. He may be a jerk ass but oh my gosh is he a good dancer and gorgeous! _

_Out of nowhere, Edward pulled me off the dance floor and outside where the moonlight made the empty street look, I don't know, kinda cool. _

_"Bella." He looked at me and said my name in such a…a different way then I'm used to. If we were dating or something I'd say he was talking to me in a…a loving way! Suddenly he leaned in and kissed me! Not that I really minded because hot damn he's a good kisser! As suddenly as he kissed me, he stopped. Then got down on one knee. _

_"Isabella Swan, I have worked with you for a year now and you captured my heart as soon as you walked through the doors. You make me very hot for you and I like you. A lot. Marry me?" Did he just ask me to marry him? My brain fuzzed out a little and then came back into focus. I'm turning 25 soon and I'm not getting any younger, plus look how hot he looks! Hehehe, who cares if he's an annoying jerk? He's hot…_

_"Okay!" The rest of the night was a blur as he headed off to a jewelry store, bought me a diamond ring—which I refused repeatedly, just too expensive!—, and went to a Chapel. I faintly remembered doing the 'I do's' and then heading off to his apartment where we both fell asleep immediately. _

_The next morning I woke-up in a foreign bed and looked around; my head slightly pounding with pain. Then all of a sudden last night's activities came back to me in a rush. I got married! To Edward! AAHHH! My left hand felt heavier than usual because of the HUGE diamond on a ring sitting on my poor ring finger! I cannot believe I was so irresponsible. It's okay, I can just get a divorce, simple and easy. Now, where's Edward? _

_Why did I marry Edward Cullen out of all the cute guys at the bar? Okay, sad to admit but he was the best looking one there, but still! I wasn't even that drunk yet I still let my emotions get the best of me and what was I thinking when I agreed to marry him?! _

_"Honey, I'm home! Hahaha, I've always wanted to say that! I got some aspirin for us because I don't know about you but my head was hurting this morning!" Edward strolled into the apartment all cheery and happy and he came over and kissed me while whispering 'good morning, beautiful'. What the heck? Am I in some sort-of alternate universe? Since when is Edward freaking Cullen nice to me?! _

_End Flashback_

Now I've been 'happily married' to Edward Cullen for about a month. That's how my life got ruined. Apparently I had been wrong the whole time and Edward has secretly been totally in love with me or whatever. He refused to divorce me because he too thought we were meant to be and nobody listened to me. We made this whole contract that I would let him act as husband so I could keep my job. You see if we got divorced then we totally screwed up company policy of employees not being allowed to marry their bosses so yea. But he promised that if I don't fall in love with him in one year then he'll divorce me and I can still keep my job without any hassles. Being the boss's son really had benefits for him. Even Carlisle was ecstatic about the impromptu marriage! Everyone was happy and their only regret was not being able to see the wedding. Alice had her solution to that; if I fell in love with him within the year she's going to throw me a huge wedding.

With the company policy issue, Carlisle told us that we'd have to keep the marriage on the down low before it's completely official. Therefore, Edward and I still had to treat each other the same way we did before. Thus, the annoying boss. My job got switched from being Carlisle's assistant editor to Edward's assistant editor. Now my only issue was that if Edward heard a single complaint from me at work then as soon as I got home he'd bring me back an overly ostentatious and very expensive present. I mean I get one everyday because he would like to 'apologize for being so cruel to the most beautiful girl on the planet'. And for that, he always did things to annoy me on purpose just to give him an excuse to get me something elaborate and unnecessary.

"Bella?! You spaced out again! Wow, you look like you're going to physically combust from anger. Are you okay? Oh wait, let me guess. That was Edward, wasn't it?"

"Yes, Alice and he gave me 20 files to finish by Monday! I'm going to—you know what? Forget it; I'm not going to yell at him. I have something better." Alice smirked knowingly, the one thing that really bothers Edward besides something bad happening to me blah blah blah, is when he gets jealous…

**I'm sooo sorry for those of you that wanted to see hot, jealous Edward!!! But this took me a really long time to write and I think it's long enough. The explanation of everything became longer than I thought it would be, I definitely promise hot, jealous Edward next chapter!! BTW, I'm not sure if I'll be able to update this quickly all the time but I'm definitely going to try my hardest because with your guys' reviews I know I'll be able to do it! I hope you liked this chapter!! =]]**


	3. The Little Green Monster

**Hey all!! Thank-you for the reviews!! I just cannot tell you how thank-full I am for them! They just make my day! Anyways, I'm sorry for making you guys wait longer than I usually but here is the new chapter! Enjoy :)**

**Chapter 3: The Little Green Monster**

"We're here!!! Woohoo!" Alice gave a yelp of joy as we reached Eclipse, the club. She was dressed in a sparkly pink dress that hugged her petite figure with matching shoes. Now in truth she looked like a little pixie.

As we headed inside, my heart beat rapidly, awaiting the pure torture I'm going to put Edward in. You see, he has this problem when it comes to jealousy. He can't stand it if some other guy is touching me in places that no normal, decent guy would do. I mean I did marry him while I was drunk so he's always been a little let's say _possessive _whenever I came near alcohol. This I like to take advantage of from time to time…

"Hey there! Wow, those are such big muscles!"

"Yea! Do you like work out or something? We just _love_ a guy with big muscles! Hehehe!" I know it's wrong but nevertheless Alice and I flirted our way into the club where we spotted Emmett immediately. And right next to him was Edward. Perfect.

"Hey! Where's Jazzy?" Count on Alice to ask for Jasper right away, those two are like magnets toward each other.

"He went to go get some more drinks. Come on, Emmy let's go dance!" Rose grabbed Emmett to go dance or in reality, grind like no one else is in the room. Alice too left, of course to go find Jasper. This left Edward all to me, who took my waist and pulled me in between his legs.

"Hello, Beautiful." Edward leaned in and kissed me sweetly. Then his eyes roamed my body appreciatively and he whispered in my ear.

"You look extremely delicious tonight; too bad we're in a crowded room." Even though I didn't want to, I shivered and it's not cold in here. Time to get my plan in action.

"So…20 files? Come on, Edward!" Instead of the anger he's expecting—which, mind you, there is a lot of—I pouted at him. His eyes glazed over a little before he shook his head out of it.

"Well I have been itching to buy you this lovely diamond necklace! Besides the angrier you get, the more you let Alice do what she wants when it comes to her Bella Barbie game. I'm definitely happy about that." At this he looked at me again. Ugh, what a pervert!

"Though I know that 20 files are a bit much, that was awful of me to do but Jacob called me during work, right after you left actually. Why do you even hang out with him? But don't worry, I will do all of the files for you, sweetheart." Great! One moment he's a pervert, the next a caveman, and then a really sweet guy. Do you think he's bipolar?

"No, it's fine. I can do all the files myself, thank-you. Now, why did Jacob call?" Looking at him from under my lashes, I portrayed innocence. Ha! I swear I saw him stop breathing for a second; sometimes the kind of influence I have over him can come in handy.

"First things first, you are not doing all of that editing by yourself! I am at least doing half of them if not all. Second, Jacob called to tell me he met you today. He said you guys went on a date, is that true?" Did I forget to mention a little rivalry that Edward and Jake have? They went to high school together and there was some competition between them for sports or whatever. Either way, they weren't exactly warmed up to each other. This then comes into a surprise because I've known Jake for a really long time yet I never met Edward until I started working in Red Ribbon and then I got married to him.

Jake was really upset at first but once I explained the real situation to him, he found it hilarious! Although he does try anything to make Edward angry which comes in handy when I want Jake to help me finish some work when Edward thinks I can't or won't be able to. Now, Jake makes his crush on me a little more known to Edward then before. Not exactly nice for me but if it gets Edward angry then I'm all for it! Hopefully he'll be able to turn the anger on Jake to me so I can get me a divorce! But for now, I'll have to be patient.

"No, we didn't go on a date. Why are you so territorial when it comes to Jake? Or any other guy, Edward?" Seriously, I'm a big girl and I can handle myself. I don't need a guy to watch out for me! I've been doing that ever since I was 5 when my mother left me with my dad. He was so upset over my mother, Renee, leaving that he just turned into a robot. I had to grow up real fast after that. Anyways, back to Edward.

"It's just that I honestly feel something very deep for you, Bella. I know you can handle yourself but you can't exactly blame me seeing as you married me while you were drunk, sure I may have been drunk too but I meant it. It may not be love yet but I can't let you go. Plus, you should see how the other guys look at you! As if you're a trophy or something. It just makes me so angry, I'm sorry. Will you forgive me?" How am I supposed to stay mad at someone who is like this?! Ugh, I hate him! He makes it so hard to hate him so much that I hate him! Does that make any sense?

"Yea, I'll forgive you." I rolled my eyes and mumbled out my forgiveness and in response he smiled his crooked smile and lightly pecked me on the cheek.

"Good, I'm glad. Besides how can you resist me, beautiful?" Okay this is why I get mad at him! He's so cocky, confident!

"Oh, please, you're so full of yourself. Sure I didn't go out on a date with Jake but I did meet him on the subway to get _your _coffee." At least he had the dignity to look a guilty at this. I continued on.

"Jake actually saved me from this creepy old guy that started hitting on me and then he walked with me and helped me with your files too! He's such a great guy!" The reaction I expected happened, Edward stiffened slightly.

"He is not a 'great guy'. Please, he's just waiting to get with you! As soon as any sign comes that we're getting a divorce then he'll pounce! I swear, Bella. He only does some of the things he does to show me off. I stayed in school and he quit just to show me that he could have a business without having gone to school for all of college. Now that I'm married to you, he's interested in you! I mean I know he's always had a crush on you but now he wants you because I'm married to you! And who was that guy bothering you? Bella, I'll find him and have him arrested, if he bothers you again." Boys and their stupid grudge-holding.

"Edward forget the old guy, that was nothing, but Jacob is my friend and he has been for a very long time. Sure he did have a crush on me but he is not trying to steal me away for himself. We got that crush stuff over with a long time ago. Don't you see he just keeps pushing it because he knows it pisses you off? _I'm_ the one you should be mad at! Hanging out with your worst enemy! Better yet, being best friends with your worst enemy! I'm like the frienemy in this whole concoction!"

"Bella don't be ridiculous. I could never hate you! I agree that you seem to dislike me very much but I don't hate you and I would never do anything to hurt you for real. But Jacob is not a good influence! He's my worst enemy; you can't keep hanging out with him! He's, he's vile, Bella!" Please, he's jealous, isn't he? Oh my God! Edward Cullen is jealous! That's why he seems to hate Jacob a lot more lately!

"One, Jacob is not vile, he's my friend! Two, stop telling me what to do! And three, are you jealous?!" My voice cracked at the end because I just couldn't believe it. In the year I've known Edward he's always been so collected and well-put, never a sign of weakness. Until now. When Edward would get pissed at Jacob I always thought it was because of whatever rivalry they had but now I see a whole new perspective! I don't even have to work at making Edward jealous; I just have to hang around Jake more often. I should remember that for later…

"Jealous? Ha! You think I'm jealous of Jacob of all people?! Yeah right! That is the furthest thing I feel when it involves Jacob. Psh, jealousy! How could you think something like that?! Come on, Bella. You've known me for so long and jealous? Ha! No, I am not jealous. It doesn't matter either way because as I have said before when it comes to Jacob and me, I'm irresistible. You cannot resist me."

"Watch me…" Here comes the fun! Pushing away from him, I went out onto the dance floor, straight to the middle, and started rocking my hips to the beat. Soon enough—just as I expected—some random guy came and latched himself onto my hips. Hey, at least he's cute.

"Hey, there, what's your name?" He had blonde hair and shiny blue eyes, very cute.

"Bella and you?"

"Mike. I couldn't let a pretty girl like you dance all by yourself." I beamed at him and out of the corner of my eye, I saw Edward looking extremely pissed.

We started dancing and his hands roamed a little too much for my comfort but as long as Edward is mad then I don't really care too much. Then all of a sudden someone grabbed me from behind; surprise, surprise, it's Edward.

"Dude, what's your problem?" Mike seemed to be getting pissed but not as pissed as Edward looked.

"Yea, with _my _wife." At that, Edward held my left hand up for Mike to see, his eyes widened and he ran away while quickly stuttering an apology to Edward's death glare. He ruins all the fun.

"Edward! You ruin all the fun, that guy was cute!" His striking green eyes turned into slits at my statement.

"Bella, his hands were all over you! You do not deserve to be treated in such a manner! Your body should be worshipped not used for sick pleasure! I saw the look in his eyes, he was planning to get you drunk and then get laid. And I do not want a repeat of what happened the last time you got drunk."

"Edward I got married to you that time! Now you just refuse to divorce me, is that my fault? Besides, what if I liked him touching me like that?" Alright, now I'm just asking for a fight but I think that drink from earlier is getting to my head. His eyes darkened at my statement.

"Bella, you will _never_ talk about yourself like that! If you don't respect yourself then how can I? You are not some prostitute willing to sell yourself for money! You are a wonderful, beautiful, respectable girl and I will have no less for you!" What do I say to that? Is he starting to get more perfect? That bastard! Ugh, I _need_ a drink.

I walked over to the bar to get a drink when Alice and Rose popped out behind me.

"Hey, how's it going with Edward? Trouble in paradise?" Rose giggled at her own little joke. Paradise and Edward just cannot be used in the same sentence.

"You guys know how much I hate him, but tonight I just do not want to think about him. Let's drink!" They listened to me as we gulped in our shots. Sweet relief.

"So what's up with you guys?" It may not seem the time but I decided to catch up with my best friends!

"Nothing new that you didn't know about two hours ago. Jazzy and I danced and it was so much fun! He's such a good dancer, ahh guys I think I love him!" Whoa, that's big!

"Wow, you go girl! I mean it only took you guys six months to get together and now about another six months later I bet you guys will get married! Let's just hope my cousin's not too much of a wimp, he needs to man up sometimes!" Of course, there is Rose's blunt input but surprisingly, Alice blushed at what Rose said. Alice? Blush? Has hell frozen over?

"Well, I know from personal experience he is very much a man…" Oh, now I get it. Great, I blushed just as much as Alice if not more. I'm sure my face looks like a tomato right now.

"Alice, please, too much info!" I do _not_ need to get inside my friends' sex lives!

"You guys asked for it by questioning his man-hood. Anyways, what have you and Em been up to?" Now that I've had a couple shots I'm a bit more confident so it came as no surprise when I said:

"Oh! I can answer that one. Rose and Em have most likely been grinding on each other on the dance floor! I swear the way you two dance it is the same as having sex except with clothes on!"

"At least I'm getting some Bella! I mean if you just tell Edward that you like him then it will all be good and you guys can get it on!" Not helping the blushing problem! But, EW, gross! I cannot imagine doing things like that with Edward!

"Shut-up, Rosalie! How many times must I tell you that I do not—

"Bella! Skanky bitch at 12:00, Edward's looking very uncomfortable." I turned around in my seat to see a red haired bimbo attempting to flirt with Edward. Anyone with eyes could see how uncomfortable he is. Other then the slight pang I felt in my gut, why should I care? He's a big boy; he can take care of himself.

"Come on, Bella! What are you doing? Go over there and tell that skanky bitch not to mess with your man!" Rose, always very supportive in her own unique way.

"I don't really care; he can take care of himself. He doesn't need me."

"Bella, I think he's trying to signal you over to help him, you should go! This is your chance to be superman except you'll be superwoman!"

"It's okay, Alice. It's not like he'll die if she keeps flirting with him." My nonchalance of the whole situation must have really bothered Alice because the next thing I know she's in my face yelling at me.

"Isabella Cullen you march right over there and go save your husband from a flirting skanky bitch! Right now!" I'm not going to be the one to stick around and face the wrath of the evil pixie princess. So, grudgingly, I went over to see what I could do.

"Um, sorry but I'm, uh, I have a wife that I really need to get to so if you excuse—

"Who cares about her? Come on, Eddie, she's a big girl I'm sure she won't mind if I steal you for a second." That really got me pissed. Not the whole Edward in that situation thing but she's trying to force him to do something he clearly does not want to do!

"Excuse-me, but I do care! Now why don't you go to a whore house because that is a place where you can definitely get some! Go be the person we all know you are." Out of the corner of my eyes I saw Edward's jaw drop, I think it was at my forwardness. There's only one way to get rid of a bitch: bitch her back better!

"Like yea, right! Eddie will divorce you in like a second! You're just like way too ugly so he'll like divorce you!" I'm surprised she knows such a big word as 'divorce'.

"I wish, but sadly no. _Edward_ will not divorce me no matter how much I beg and plead but if it's one thing I know for sure he will not divorce me for a slut like you! Now, run along!" I cannot believe in chivalry terms I just 'defended my man's honor'.

"Bella, did you—

"Yea, yea, yea, I need a drink."

A couple hours later, I'm tipsy as hell and Edward keeps following me! Why is he following me? It's not like I'm gonna do somethin' bad!

"Edward, why you following me?? Hehehe!" I think my words came out slurred, ha-ha!

"Bella, darling, honey, sweetheart, please be careful! You're a little drunk and I don't want anything happening to you!" His voice sounded concerned, hehehe! I giggled as the floor came towards my face but before I could say hello, I found myself in Edward's arms. He wants to hold me? Hahaha, why?

"Edward! Do you want an excuse to touch me? Hahaha, all you had to do was ask, silly! But, but there's a problem!" My eyes widened and I leaned into whisper in his ear.

"There's a problem, there is! You, I, you see, I don't like you! Hahaha! I don't like you at all Edward! But, BUT! You are very pretty, hehe!" I stroked his pretty cheek while he looked exasperated with me. What did I do? He has no right to be that way with me! Feeling the anger rising within me, I should go…potty! I should go potty!

"Bella! Where are you going?" He was following me again! But this time he came faster!

"To the potty!" There! That stopped him dead in his tracks. Hehehe, I have a secret! I tricked Edward! I lied! Hahaha! Instead of going to the potty, I went to look for my friends!!! Then I founded them! Hahaha! They were on the dance flooring! Must be having fun! I want to have fun. Edward's no fun. Too much work.

"I want fun!"

"Hey, babe, I can be fun." Some guy that looked nice said he's fun. Is he fun? I'll investigate and then tell you, okay? Hehehe!

"Okay! Hehehe!" He pulled me to the dance of the floor and we floored! Hahaha! This is fun! You should get out of my head and then do it! Hehehe!

"Babe, you're a good dancer. You know, we've been dancing for a long time now, I should get you something to drink." Drink? Oh hell yes! I'm thirsty. But why does he keep calling me 'babe'? My name is Bella.

"Bella! Yes!" There, that clears everything up! Whoever he was went away to get me a drink. I'm tired. There's no where to sit except on the floor so I sat down, waiting for Babe. I hope Babe comes back soon with my drink.

"Bella!" Is that Babe? Sadly no, it was Mr. Party Pooper, Edward.

"I'm with Babe so what do you want?" He looked confused by what I said and I giggled at his silly face.

"Darling, I have to get you home. Come on, you must be really tired, right?" Why is he talking to me like I'm a baby? I'm not a baby! But I like his pretty voice, haha! Edward helped me get on my head so I stood up straight.

"Dude, go get another girl, this one's mine." Babe's back!

"Babe! You have my drink! Hehe, this is Edward. He's a party pooper but don't tell him, okay?" I was going to take my drink when Edward restrained me and put himself in front of me. Hey! No fair!

"She is not _yours_. Were you going to actually get her intoxicated more than she already is just so you can get laid? Pathetic!" Before I could say anything Babe snapped back at Edward. That's mean! Nobody snaps at my Edward unless it's me!

"Oh, please and you're not trying to do the same thing? Dude, she's a hot girl and I saw her and danced with her first so back the hell off!" Babe pushed Edward, who stumbled a little and they both looked mad. Am I in trouble? Did I do something wrong? But, wait! Babe cannot be mean to my Edward. That's not nice! So I got in between the boys and said to Babe:

"Excuse-me Mr. Babe! But you cannot be mean to my Edward! I don't want your drink no more so ha! Now I'm going to go flooring with my Edward, bye bye Mr. Babe!" He looked bewildered as I dragged Edward off to go floor with me on the dance. When I turned around to see Edward, he looked a mixture of happy and then amusement.

"Are you laughing at me?" I just saved him from another meanie and now he's laughing at me?! How rude!

"No, darling, I'm not laughing at you, I'm just happy that you're okay. Come on, I should get you home, we don't want a repeat of all this, okay?" Shrugging, I let him lead me out of the floor.

Outside it was freezing and since Edward noticed, he gave me his jacket. He's nice! I told him that, too. When I got into the car, Edward pulled out his phone and I think he sent a text to my friends.

A little later, Edward stopped the car. I'm sleepy.

"Edward, I'm sleepy."

"Alright, darling, we're almost there, do you want me to carry you?"

"I'm sleepy." Chuckling, he took me into his arms and carried me up the stairs. In the apartment I didn't feel sleepy anymore. I want to play!

"Edward, I'm not sleepy anymore, let's play! Hahaha!"

"Sweetheart, it's 2 in the morning, you have to sleep. Come on." He took me to the bedroom, what a silly goose! I know what he wants!

"Aww, Edward! Hahaha, I know what you want! Why didn't you just ask?" I jumped on him and started kissing him; I hope this will make him happy.

"Bella mmm, what mmm are mmm you mmm doing? Mmmm" I kept kissing him but he was talking. Before I could take it further, he held me off at arms length.

"What are you doing?"

"Silly! I'm kissing you! I know you invited me to the bedroom because you want to sleep with me! Hahaha! Edward, I'll sleep with you if that's all you want! Then will you divorce me and go? Hehehe!" Wrapping my arms around him once more, I tried to kiss him but he turned his head away.

All of a sudden I felt my feet leave the ground and I looked up at Edward. Whoa. Pretty eyes! He put me down on the bed and kissed my forehead. What's he doin'?

"Edwa—

"Shh, sweetheart, when I asked you to marry me, I meant it. How many times do I have to tell you that? I didn't ask you to marry me just so I could sleep with you and I refuse to let you submit yourself to me that way. Now I think you should rest." My eyes closed of their own accord but I still heard Edward whispering quietly.

"Darling, I think I'm in love with you but I will not take your innocence away from you." With that, I felt his lips touch my forehead.

**Did you like it? Was it jealous filled enough for you guys?? I was thinking of maybe doing some Edward's POV for the next chapter but I'm not sure, what do you guys think? Should I stick to Bella POV or should I mix it up a bit?**


	4. A Regular Day In My Life

**Hey all! Thank-you for all the amazing reviews!! I just cannot thank all of you enough! Here is chapter 4, I'm sorry if I'm a little late but it took me a while to write…Enjoy :)**

**Chapter 4: A Regular Day in My Life**

**Bella POV**

I woke up to feel my head pounding. Oh God, what happened last night? The only thing I can remember is going to the bar with Alice and Rose. Then meeting the boys and I recall wanting to make Edward feel jealous. I guess I drank a little too much than I should; alcohol really affects my memory.

"Good morning, gorgeous! I have some aspirin and water for you right by the bedside table and here is your breakfast. How are you feeling?" Edward put a breakfast tray in my lap before coming around and sitting next to me, waiting to feed me if I asked, it think…

"Fine, it's just my head hurts a lot and I want to die right now." I truly meant that. My head is pounding like a monkey on a drum! In response, Edward simply chuckled and shook his head.

"Well, I'm not going to let that happen, beautiful." Kissing my forehead, Edward took the spoon out of the oatmeal in front of me and started feeding me. Now why is it I hate this man? A diamond ring flashed on my left hand; oh, that's why! At this point, as Edward spooned oatmeal into my mouth, I realized we have been whispering this whole time. Thank-god for that! I don't think I could take loud noises, I mean just the sound of the spoon in the oatmeal is getting on my nerves.

After Edward fed me all of the oatmeal, he made me take the aspirin and water then I fell asleep. The rest of the weekend was pretty much the same, I got up, Edward fed me something then I fell back asleep. He was so sweet the entire time, am I starting to feel something for him? Before my heart could go too far I always reminded myself of work and what he did to me there, I cannot fall in love with my husband! That's just so sick! As weird as that sounds…

Monday morning came faster than I ever thought it would and I realize now that this is why I don't drink alcohol too much. I always fall sick, loose most of my memory of that night, and I take way too long to recover. Currently, I'm standing in my walk-in closet filled with clothes that Alice bought me, trying to decide what to wear.

"Bella, honey, are you okay? You've been in here for half an hour now, are you sure you want to go to work today?" Edward stayed with me this morning instead of going to work early as he always does. Now he is even offering me to stay home and as much as I would love that, I must not show weakness. I'm the one who chose to get heavily drunk and now I must face the consequences of that decision.

"I'm fine; I just can't decide what to wear. And I'm definitely going to work; I got drunk so I have to face the consequences. Now if you'll please leave then I can get ready." His arms wrapped around me from behind.

"You don't have to go if you don't want to, darling. I'm your boss and I'm very flexible when it comes to my beautiful, recovering from a hang-over wife." With this he kissed me neck. I hate him! He makes it so hard to not like him! Seriously, he's such an asshole at work yet when I'm at home then he is the sweetest guy ever. If I didn't meet him at work and if he wasn't such a jerk before then I probably would have the biggest crush on him. But I don't! Ugh, this is just the aftermath of alcohol talking. This isn't me.

"No, no, I'm going. So, if you don't mind, leave! I need to get ready because we're already running late as is." Edward quietly left and I turned back around in the closet, looking at all the clothes. Hoping for some semblance of a fashion sense that Alice might have rubbed off on, I randomly put together an outfit. It was a gray pencil skirt with a white top and brown belt around my waist paired up with some matching gray pumps.

Instead of me driving myself to work today, Edward insisted on driving. One extremely drunken night and I'm suddenly a very breakable glass doll! Humph.

"Hi, Eddie! Do you have anything for me to do today?" Lauren giggled like a school girl while batting her lashes furiously at Edward. Pathetic. This is _so_ not what I need on a Monday morning. Looking at me from the corner of his eyes, Edward smiled crookedly and replied to Lauren.

"Yes, actually, I need you to go get some star bucks coffee and some sort of pastry dish. Oh and while you're out please also grab some aspirin." My jaw dropped. He was sending Lauren off to go do something that normally he would make me do?! Oh hell no! He is _not _going easy on me today! Of all the days he could go easy on me, he chooses today?! I'm perfectly healthy and fine but our publishing deadline is tomorrow—I just realized that, no wonder he had given me 20 files!—and we cannot afford for one of the editors of this company to do nothing all day! Ugh, he always does this when he thinks I'm sick or something but I'm perfectly fine!

"Bella!" Edward caught me around my waist; I guess I was wobbling and about to fall. Maybe I should have stayed home…Wait, no! No, no, I am not some weak damsel, I am strong. That's right; I am a strong, independent woman.

"I'm fine, I'm fine. I guess I just lost it for a sec, so, what do you want me to do, boss?" He looked at me as if I were crazy.

"Don't be ridiculous, you're not doing anything today. You need to recover, I know you take forever to get over the effects of alcohol, Alice told me. Therefore, you are not doing anything today. Just sit down and relax, that's your job for now."

"No! Edward, I mean Mr. Cullen, the publishing deadline is tomorrow! I have to do something; there must be a whole load of files ready to be edited!"

"You need to rest, so sit down here and relax, most likely Alice will want to take you shopping soon, I heard her talking about it so you need to rest." Taking my hand, Edward led me into the office and forced me to sit down on my chair.

"Come on; just give me something to do! Please?" Knowing my power over him, I used my puppy dog eyes. Sighing, he rolled his eyes and dropped a really tiny file on my desk.

"Here, if you insist on something to do, well then this is a short story that I need edited. By the way, when Lauren comes back with the food and aspirin, take it. It's for you." With that, he left to go inside his office but shut the door quickly before I could see inside. But I got a little glimpse anyways; there were piles and piles of folders and stories needing to be edited on his desk. I'll convince him soon enough.

This may seem very strange but I like doing my job, that's why I got it! Having Edward as my boss isn't exactly the cherry on top or anything but with him I get to at least to the job I love to do. And I'm definitely not the type of girl who'll sit aside and let the guy do all the work while she just sits around looking pretty. Pretty dumb if you ask me.

In a matter of minutes I finished editing the short story—it was only seven pages!

"Eddie! Are you in your office? I have your food! Hehehe! Oh, it's _you_." Lauren walked in and said 'you' in such a disgusted voice it almost made me laugh. Psh, she thinks that Edward is so in love with her and that she's the prettiest and highest queen on earth? Pigs will fly before I ever believe that to be true. She's so fake it really makes me feel sorry for Edward but it's his problem, not mine.

"Just leave the stuff on that table over there and you can leave." I motioned with my hands for her to leave. But no, she always has to put up a fight with me. Will she never understand?

"Excuse-me, but like you're not my boss! You're a low life bitch who probably got this high in the company because you sleep around with all your bosses! Eddie is in love with me, he's just taking his time because he so nice that he doesn't want to crush your heart! I don't get why that is but like he's too nice for his own good!" Just as I was about to punch her out unconscious because I really do not want to deal with her nasal voice right now, Edward's arms wrapped around me from behind, holding me back. Ugh, he has perfect timing! One more minute and everything would have been dandy!

"Ladies, you are here to work not to fight. Ms. Swan, I must ask you not to get violent with your co-workers. And Lauren, I must ask you to keep your comments to yourself, I have never slept with a co-worker and I never will." When he said that, Edward turned slightly and secretly winked at me. I just rolled my eyes. He turned back to Lauren and continued.

"As I said, ladies please keep to yourselves and Lauren stay at your desk for the rest of the day, I've e-mailed you some work to do." He waited until Lauren left to round on me; great, here we go.

"Bella, what was that all about? I mean I heard Lauren talking and that's why I came out but were you just about to attack her? What's wrong? You've never been a violent one except when it comes to me…" Smiling his crooked smile he looked at me with concern in his eyes.

"She was annoying me; you don't know how frustrating she is!" His eyes rolled in disbelief.

"Are you kidding me? I walk in here everyday to have her flirt with me and what am I supposed to say to her? I don't want to fire her because when asked to she does her job and it's so frustrating for me because at times when she's so rude to you I feel like telling her the entire truth! But I must always keep myself in check, that is frustrating, much more than what it must be like for you."

"No way! It's equally as frustrating! She flirts with you all the time and I have to watch it! Her sad attempts at being sultry are the weirdest and saddest thing ever! Sure you have to endure it but I have to watch it! She comes in here acting like you're in love with her and I know you're not, it's just so annoying! She treats me as if I'm the coffee girl or something and it doesn't help the fact that I do get coffee for you because at work you treat me that way! This is why I hate you! Ever since I started working here you've treated me as your slave! Sure when we're at home you're a perfect gentleman but when we get here, you're the most obnoxious thing ever! I just don't get why you do that! Can't you treat me like a normal employee?! And if I ever complain then you go and buy me an overly expensive gift, as if I need that! Expensive gifts don't go and make everything better, why can't you just let me be happy by leaving me alone?! Why are you forcing yourself on me? With that year contract crap? You're just…impossible! I'm taking my break right now." He stood there bewildered at me as I stormed out of the office with my purse in hand.

As the cool air hit my face from outside, I calmed down enough to feel embarrassed at my outburst. That was totally uncalled for. But I need to work out my anger and I know the one person I can do that with is Jake, so I called him and asked him to meet me at the park.

When I reached the bench I told Jake to meet me at, I saw that he was already there.

"Jake!" His head snapped up as he heard me calling his name.

"Hey, Bells! What's up?"

"I really need to talk to you about stuff with Edward." His eyes slightly hardened but there was amusement nonetheless and he motioned for me to start walking on the path while we talk.

"What did Eddie do now?"

"You know he hates that nickname but anyways I'm just really angry at him right now that I don't know where to start."

"Here's a thought, start at the beginning. Why are you angry at _Edward_? What did he do that triggered all this?" Jake quickly saved me from tripping on a pebble—that's right, a pebble!—and I continued talking as if that never happened because it always happens.

"Well my anger started as soon as I started working for Carlisle. He's always annoyed me and made me do unnecessary work but I had to do what he said because he's my boss's son! Then one night I get tipsy and find myself married to the man but he refuses to divorce me! Then we make up some sort of weird one year contract and I'm just sick of it! Why can't he treat me like a normal person? What is his twisted logic in that if he's mean to me at work then he can buy me an expensive gift? I don't get that! Can't he treat me like a normal person? But it doesn't end at that! No! When I'm not at work with him he is so sweet!" Jake scoffed at that but ignoring him I continued on my little rant.

"He can be so nice and when I'm sick yet I'm still at work he goes overboard it's so annoying! When I'm sick or something he doesn't give me any work to do but then when I'm better it's back to the workload! Then he comes home with a diamond necklace and spends the rest of the night apologizing to me and doing little things that make me want to fall for him but then I think of how much a jerk he is and change my mind! He's just so confusing that I don't get him! What is going on in that boy's head?!"

Before Jake could respond I heard the words 'watch out!' and Jake yelling my name until I felt something hard hit my head and I blacked out.

**Edward's POV**

She stormed out of the room after her rant and I'm sure my face was still in a mask of bewilderment before I snapped back to reality. Shuffling into my office, I plumped down on my desk chair to think about her words and I realized that she's right. Buying her expensive gifts and treating her like a slave at work is not the way to treat someone! Especially someone I think I'm in love with…

Thinking about the first day I saw her brings a big smile to my face. She was new here and fresh out of college but Jasper convinced dad that she was good at her job and he was right! Bella was the wonder woman that this company has needed all along.

At first sight I was enraptured with her beauty. She didn't know it then but I lost my heart to her from the moment she walked in. But this…_thing_ I had been feeling for her scared me because of the 26 years of life I've had, no girl fascinated until her. I guess I took my anger out on her at first because I was scared of what she made me feel for her. It was like I was in love with her the moment her eyes met mine and that wasn't right. Things don't happen that way! There's no such thing as love as first sight.

Continually, I took my anger out on her by giving her unnecessary work that Lauren could do for me. Why did she make me feel that way about her? Why is she so special to me? I've met countless of women yet when I see her it all goes haywire!

Tanya claimed to love me yet I still felt nothing. She was blonde, blue eyed, and very pretty but I still didn't feel a single ounce of attraction to her! Then when Bella came I suddenly felt that I prefer brunettes…

After a couple weeks of my ridiculous treatment of Bella my two brothers had a long chat with me. I told them everything that I felt for her and why I kept doing what I did. They showed me my own stupidity and I set myself a goal to treat Bella better.

But when it came time to woo her, I lost it. Originating back to my kindergarten skills, I treated her badly to show her how much I was infatuated with her. She didn't get it and after a while I felt like it was expected of me so I didn't stop.

Then came the perfect moment to woo her. The bar we went to a month ago. I ruined that too. After drinking so much I showed her my true feelings for her instead of taking it slow. But the way she was, the way she existed just attracted me to her. The way she would walk, talk, look, act, smile, breathe, work, dress, yell, fight, scold, and defend was so enchanting. Marrying her was one of the best and worst things of my life. It was the best because I was linked forever to Bella, the woman I was so enraptured with yet it was the worst because she didn't want it.

The morning she woke, it broke my heart to see that she wanted to divorce me! In a hopeless attempt to keep her I made that one year contract with her and to my utter surprise she agreed to it! Then it all went downhill because I somehow deluded myself into thinking that the worse I treated her at work then I can buy her something expensive, apologize profusely and treat her like the queen she is. But now I realize that I could have done that without treating her like a slave at work. Although the cute little fits she throws are very amusing; watching her think she's a ferocious tiger when in reality she's a cute little kitten is adorable!

Clubbing the other day was also very fun, except for when Bella kept trying to make me jealous. As if I don't have enough of that already! I know giving her 20 files to do wasn't the smartest thing but the scoundrel Jacob Black had called me and informed me of his 'date' with Bella that I got so angry. But of course, I wasn't going to make her do all the files. I would have done most of them for her. My reasoning for giving her that workload was to make her feel something for me, empowering what she must have felt for Jacob. But then when I talked to her, I realized that he was just trying to make me angry. Instead of the anger I expected from her, Bella came sweetly but secretly she was going to do everything possible to make me jealous. What she doesn't understand is that I'm in a constant state of jealousy because of all the guys that stare at her.

When those guys were dancing with her and touching her, all I could see was red. The fact that she married me while drunk and otherwise wouldn't have anything to do with me makes me panic every time she gets anywhere near a club or alcohol. What if she does the same thing but with another guy? What if she turns out to love that guy? As selfish as this seems, I can't let her be with another guy. No matter how happy she'd be, I don't think I would be able to survive. In the end, if she chooses someone else, I don't know what I will do.

Suddenly my phone rang, breaking me out of my thoughts. The caller id said unknown, I wonder who it is.

"Hello?" Jacob's frantic voice replied. At first the mere sound of his voice in my ears infuriated me but then the sound of urgency and fear in it made me worried. What if something happened to Bella?

"Edward! You have to get down to the hospital _right now_! Bella got a blow in the head and now she's in the emergency room—

Before he could say anything else, I snapped my phone shut and ran down to my car. Reaching the hospital in record time, I went straight to the desk and located where Bella is. Running through the halls, I immediately spotted Jacob standing outside Bella's room.

"What happened?!" Even to me my voice sounded frantic, hopeless, desperate, scared, and sad. Jacob looked slightly guilty at my question and my eyes narrowed into slits at this.

"She called me as soon as she stormed out of the office and asked me to meet her at the park because she wanted someone to talk to. I met her there and she was explaining to me why she exploded at you when all of a sudden a baseball from the kids' field at the park flew and hit her in the head. It knocked her unconscious so I took her to the hospital and apparently the blow to her head was really bad. The doctors are seeing what they can do for her." A thousand emotions filled me at Jacob's explanation. Rage, sadness, guilt, hopelessness, and determination were just a few.

Alice burst through the halls along with everyone else and they too demanded an explanation while I kept myself a distance away. There are too many emotions in me right now; I don't think I'll be able to control myself if I speak.

"Edward? Edward! Snap out of it!" Alice came up to me with tears in her eyes and hugged me tightly, sobbing the whole time. But I couldn't cry. Shock was still coursing through my veins. This wasn't happening. This was just a dream. But sadly, looking at the tears in everyone's eyes I knew that it was reality.

About two hours later a doctor finally came out of the room and I rushed to him immediately.

"Doctor! Is she okay? How is she doing? Can I see her?"

"I'm sorry but only family members will be able to visit her currently and right now she's in no condition to have visitors." My heart crashed at his words. What's happened to my darling wife?!

"There are no remaining family members, I'm her husband. What is going on? Is she okay? What do you mean she's in no condition to have visitors?!" I heard the panic in my own voice but soon after felt my mother's calming embrace. The doctor looked worried.

"She's not in critical condition anymore but the damage done to her head is severe. This girl has had so many concussions on her head that this blow could have been fatal but she has pulled through. She is alive but she just cannot have any visitors right now."

"What do you mean she can't have any visitors right now?!" How dare this man refuse to let me see my wife?!

"I've known her my entire life! She's practically my sister, I have to see her!" Alice pushed herself forward right into the doctors face. A crazed look was also on her face.

"I'm sorry but none of you are allowed to see her, I'm afraid Isabella Swan-Cullen has fallen into a deep coma."

**And the drama begins…But don't you worry this isn't all of the truth! There is more yet to come…I hope you liked it! :)**


	5. My Beautiful Darling Wife

**I'm so sorry to those of you who expected an update yesterday, I tried! I really did but this chapter is one of the hardest I've written and you shall soon see why…Enjoy :)**

**Chapter 5: My Beautiful Darling Wife  
**

**Edward POV**

My heart literally stopped for a second at the doctor's words. The whole hallway became quiet. Bella was in a coma. She's lost to the world. And she might never come back. Everyone stared at me with concern until I realized that I was on the floor in a ball curled up and hyperventilating.

"For how long?" The usual smoothness of my voice sounded like a cat being strangled to death. I swear I saw everybody wince, including the doctor.

"It's not clear. She may be out for hours, days, weeks, months, or possibly even years…" He trailed off at the expression on my face. Years?! But our life was just about to get better. I was going to apologize; I was going to let her have her divorce because I could see our marriage is making her so sad. I was going to make her happy and woo her like I should have.

"Edward! Honey, you have to get up. I know this is hard but maybe you should go home and rest. Take some time to yourself, let your brain process this all." I couldn't believe my mother's words! How could she think I would leave Bella right now?! She's in a freaking coma and it's all my fault!

"I'm not going home. I'm staying here until Bella wakes up. She will wake up soon and everyone will be happy." There was determination in my voice.

"I surely hope so, darling." My mother kissed me on my forehead and left to go home I presume. She must have heard the determination in my voice and knew fighting with me would be a lost cause.

Well, I shouldn't lie down on the floor all day. Getting up, I realized there was no one else in the hallway except for the occasional nurse or doctor passing by and staring at me with sympathy in their eyes. They must know what happened. Bella is in a coma and everybody just left while the doctors and nurses are giving me sympathetic looks?! Why don't they do something about it?! Why are they just standing around doing nothing?!

I sat down in a chair next to her door pulling at my hair. Ugh, this is entirely my fault! I'm the one who's been so hard on her and so mean and cruel and inconsiderate yet she's the one who ends up in the hospital! How could life be so unfair?

If I had just stopped her before she left. If I had just never treated her like a slave. If I had just been the husband she deserves. If I had followed her at least. If I had never married her. If I had wooed her normally. What would life be like then?

"What are you thinking? By just sitting there she'll be back? Do something! I want my sister back!" Alice rushed to me with tears falling down her face like the Niagara Falls; Jasper not that far behind her.

"What am I supposed to do? She's gone, damn it!" She's gone. Alice is right in blaming me but what can I do? If I could trade places with her I would do so in a heartbeat but I cannot.

"Edward, Jazz….she's gone." Alice continued sobbing loudly while I let my tears run down my face quietly. Jasper, surprisingly, had no tears yet his face was a mask of nothingness. As if he was trying not to show his true emotions and stay strong. I wish I could do that. I wish I could fix this. She can't be gone! And if she is then I know I'll be leaving soon after.

Bella is one of the most beautiful creatures on this planet and she does not deserve this! She's beautiful inside and out. She's kind, wholesome, giving, angelic, sweet, beautiful, genuine, unique, altruistic, and so much more.

I remember the exact moment that my eyes met hers and I knew that I was in for it.

_Flashback_

_"Why do we even need a new editor? There are already plenty of them here now. Besides, she's fresh out of college! How is she supposed to keep up with the number one publishing company in the United States?!" I'm fuming right now. How could Jasper persuade dad to hire another editor, one just out of college at that! _

_"She has no work experience, we don't even know if she's good or not. Again, no experience beforehand!" _

_"Well someone has to give her her first job! Why not us?! Alice has been best friends with her since she was a toddler, I trust her when she tells me something and she told me that Bella would be great for this company." Bella? I doubt she lives up to her name. Most girls these days have so little respect for themselves. I would know, I've met thousands upon thousands of them. My secretary is one too, sadly. _

_"Just give her a shot, Edward. Alice told me that she has a feeling that Bella is the one that this company needs to succeed so much more. Let's try it out." Before I could respond to Jasper's ridiculous request, we heard the elevator doors ping, announcing someone's arrival. Soon after, we heard the click clicking of heels on the floor. _

_"That must be her so be nice." My sadly mistaken brother warned me and went to greet the lucky girl! I was going to go out and see her too when she suddenly entered my office. I had the breath knocked out of me. She definitely lives up to her name, surpasses it in my opinion. The most stunning creature walked into my office and took a seat on my couch. Jasper must have warned her about me because she looked nervous and didn't make eye contact with me. _

_She was pale, extremely pale for someone normal but who am I to talk? I'm just the same. She sported a very nice feminine look that wasn't too revealing; a simple blazer with dress pants and heels. From what I could see, she has highly developed facial features and glistening chocolate brown hair. I wonder that color her eyes are. _

_I didn't have to wonder too long because she suddenly looked up at me and I became lost in her entrancing, hypnotizing chocolate brown eyes. _

_"Edward? I'd like you to meet our newest editor, Ms. Isabella Swan or Bella as she likes to be called." My dad walked into the room and introduced Emmett, Jasper, and me to Bella. She blushed as everyone shook hands with her. What a beautiful blush that is! When she came to me, her face got a look of puzzlement and wonder then mixed with some amusement. I realized I was staring. Wait, how could this be happening to me? I may have never felt it before but I know this. She's making me infatuated with her. I'm falling in love, slowly even though I don't know this woman she's making me fall in love with her! _

_This can't be happening, there's no such thing as love! My birth parents were enough proof of that! What everyone feels is lust, women entice us into their magical world to get whatever they want. It may have happened to Carlisle or dad as I call him, Emmett, and soon enough Jasper but it will never happen to me. I can't fall in love with this woman! _

_"Edward! Say hello to Bella." Dad snapped me out of my thoughts and I turned to face her. But before I could get lost in her beautiful eyes, I prepared myself mentally._

_"Ms. Swan." Giving her a curt nod, I went back to my desk and started working. As everyone was leaving the room, I heard dad apologizing to her about my behavior and Emmett and Jasper glaring at me. I'm going to get it later. _

_End Flashback_

"Edward! You should go home now, it's midnight already! I went home and took a shower and got changed a couple hours ago. You look like you need rest so go take it!" Alice's voice brought me back to the hospital. Looking around, she and I were the only ones here it seems.

"No! I refuse to leave Bella here all alone. I'm staying. What if she wakes up while I'm gone? Then what, she'll think I abandoned her!" Alice glared at me with fury in her eyes.

"What if she doesn't wake up?! Do you think by just being here she will magically come back? Do you think by staying here anything will happen? No! Now stop being an idiot and go take care of yourself!" I, too, glared. I'm not leaving! Sure, what the pixie says is true but I don't believe it! As I said, what if she does wake up? I don't want her thinking that I abandoned her, especially since this is my fault!

"Alice I already told you, I'm staying! Like I said, if she wakes up then I don't want her thinking that I abandoned her especially since this is my fault! I should be in there and not her so please leave me to my thoughts!" She looked like she was about to explode from anger, what did I say? I'm not doing anything to her, what is her problem?!

"Edward Anthony Cullen! Don't you get it?! You sitting around here moping about thinking this is your fault will not do anything for her! So what if she wakes up while you're gone? I can just explain you went home to change and shower and maybe eat something! She'll understand because that's the type of person she is! She wouldn't want us all to ignore our lives and sit around here thinking it's our fault! What if she never wakes up, Edward? What then?! Are you going to sit around here your whole life hoping for a miracle?! All the time thinking it's your fault?! Well guess what, Edward! This is partially all of our faults and we shouldn't keep blaming ourselves because what's happened has happened! So go home, take a shower, eat something, change, and then come back!" A nurse came over to shush us because the other patients were sleeping.

Alice is right. I should go home and take care of myself. Because that is what Bella would want. She's such an altruistic person that she would want the best for everyone else before herself. She wouldn't want any of us sulking and moping around, she would want us to live our lives. Which is exactly what I'm _not_ going to do.

Bella is my first and only love. The first woman that ever touched my heart besides my mother, Esme. I don't think I can leave her like this. I know that staying here will do no good but maybe, just maybe something good can come out of me being here. I doubt it but life's surprises always seem to amaze me.

"I'm not leaving, Alice." She whisper screamed.

"You're so stubborn! Edward, go home before I force you! To tell you the truth, you look and smell like crap! You've been here over 12 hours!"

"I don't care how I look or smell! My wife is in a coma inside that room and I am not leaving her side until she wakes up! If she never wakes up then you'll never see me again because I refuse to leave her side, even in death!" Alice burst into tears at my words. They sounded harsh, even to me but it must be said. Suddenly my words caught up with my brain. _What if she never wakes up? Death…_

No! That won't happen! Bella has never done anything in her life to deserve that! She's gone through so many hardships! Then again, Bella never did anything to deserve being put in a coma. I, however, am a monster! That beautiful angel doesn't deserve any of this! Why can't I just put all of this on me and not her?!

After quarreling with Alice a little more, she finally convinced me to go home. She only got her way because Emmett and Jasper came, grabbed me and forced me home. Now they're standing guard at the hospital, one sign of me until noon tomorrow and I get a lovely beat up. This is stupid!

She's my wife! My love! How can they do this?! I don't want to live unless she does! Driving home, I thought about how good of a person she is. How she always helped those in need, no matter how much she hated them. I even remember one time Tanya came to visit, what a fight those two had!

Tanya became so jealous to learn that I was married already. I assume she came to visit all the way from Alaska to get me to fall in love with her. Again. I'm not sure how Bella felt about that but I know she didn't like Tanya, that's for sure. Although it might be the way that Tanya treated Bella; like a piece of nothing. I hated her for it. But growing up, I was taught to be a gentleman and didn't raise a hand on her, no matter how much I wanted to. All the things that girl did to Bella!

_Flashback_

_"Eddie!!!" Uh oh. I know that voice. What is Tanya doing in this office?! Last time I saw her was when we were 16 and she was moving. Even with her last couple minutes with me she asked me how I felt for her. My answer then and my answer now are still the same: I love her like a sister. And unless I'm mistaken, people don't date their sisters. _

_"Excuse me? But like who are you?" Lauren was most likely sizing Tanya up. But sadly I have to admit that Tanya is much prettier than Lauren, not as beautiful as Bella but better than Lauren. _

_"I'm Eddie's girlfriend, so move!" At that, Bella quickly came into my office, staring at me with confusion in her eyes. Bella and I have been married for two weeks now. The best two weeks of my life. Silently, I mouthed 'Tanya' to her. She understood because I had told her about Tanya once before. I wonder what Tanya will think of Bella. _

_"Eddie! There you are! I went back to our hometown and Lizzie told me that you moved here with Carlisle and Esme! So I came here! Miss me?" I stiffened at her words and at the fact that she came and sat down on my lap. I looked at Bella apologetically though she didn't seem to care what Tanya did but I saw anger boiling in her eyes. _

_Tanya saw where I was looking and got up, looking at Bella. Before the two girls could get acquainted, I quickly called Lauren and told her to postpone all meetings and calls for today and then I locked the door so nobody else could hear what we were saying. _

_"Who are you? I'm Tanya, Eddie's girlfriend!" I stepped in immediately and replied for Bella, at the same time wrapping my arm around her waist. Tanya's eyes narrowed in at this gesture._

_"Tanya, this is my wife, Bella." I thought she was going to have a heart attack the way her eyes bulged out and how her hands held her chest. Then, as I expected, anger settled in the place of shock._

_"Your WHAT?! You got married?! When? How? Why?!" I explained to her how it all happened and by the end of it she just smirked up at Bella. What's going on in her head? _

_"Oh, I get it. You only married her because you were drunk. You know, Bonnie, he doesn't really like you or anything. My Eddie's just too nice to divorce you because he knows how much you like him. Don't worry, now that I'm here all that will change." Bella was fuming at Tanya's words, I think she was about to attack her before I spoke._

_"Her name is Bella. My wife's name is Bella and no I did not marry her just because I was drunk, I love her." I held Bella back as she was about to punch Tanya out with the next words out of her mouth. _

_"Like I said, now that I'm here that will change soon enough. I'll see you later, Eddie." I hate that nickname! Everyone knows it but Tanya will never change her habit and when she wants something she's ruthless to get it. And right now, she wants me. But sadly for her, I'm all Bella's. That will never change, no matter what. _

_The next couple days were the most amusing yet annoying ever. Tanya, it turns out, lived in the hotel near Bella's and my apartment. Everyone invited themselves over everyday just to watch the events unfolding between Bella and Tanya. _

_They always had to one up each other. If Bella cooked me breakfast, then Tanya would cook me dinner with dessert. Not that the fact that Tanya's food tasted horrible and was almost always burnt mattered because it's what she did not how it was. Then again, if Tanya kissed me on my cheek, Bella would sit on my lap and have a make-out session with me right in front of Tanya. Not that I minded that or anything. _

_Finally it came time that Tanya's visit ended but she promised to come again soon. I'm just glad that this whole drama is over. A couple more days and I'm afraid I would have to have taken both these girls to the hospital! They were so close to attacking each other, each day it got worse and worse. Luckily, Tanya's vacation days aren't that many. _

_End Flashback_

Coming back to reality once again, I realized that my car was parked in my driveway and I was just sitting in it. For how long I don't even know. I got out of my car and went inside the apartment.

Once inside the small amount of joy I felt at the memory of Tanya and Bella left me. Despair took its' place. The apartment was empty, no sound, no Bella to come yell at me. Nothing. Following Alice's wishes, I took a shower and changed. But I couldn't eat. If Bella is barely holding on to her life, why should I live mine? What's the use?

When morning came and passed, I sat stiffly awaiting the time when I could finally see Bella. I hadn't gotten an ounce of sleep. Bella's sleeping and possibly forever, I don't deserve to live right now. As soon as the clock struck noon I was out of the apartment and on my way to the hospital.

"How is she? Is she okay? Did anything happen?" I hounded on Alice all of my questions while she looked up at me, annoyed.

"Nothing happened while you were gone. You're not a miracle worker, Edward! She's still the same. Nothing's changed." Alice's words hit me hard. _Nothing's changed…_

Bella's still in a coma. Still holding onto life but just barely. Like a rock, I became nothingness. I felt nothing, saw nothing.

A week passed since Bella was in the hospital. I don't remember doing anything except feeling this nothingness, this whole in my heart. Though I faintly recall Jasper and Emmett taking me home and forcing me to do the daily necessities, shower, change, and sleep a little. I never got much sleep but when I did rest my eyes I only saw memories I had with Bella in the past year. Most of the time I sat on a chair next to Bella's room.

"Mr. Cullen?" Doctor Gregory came to me.

"What is it? Did something happen? Is she awake?" My heart fluttered in my chest with the possibilities.

"No, no, nothing's happened but you've been here for so long that I guess you could go in and see her. Mind you, she's still in a coma and might not be able to hear a single word you say. Also, please try not to be shocked by how she looks, it's not as bad as it may seem." My heart beat twice as fast with the doctor's words. I could see Bella! Maybe miracle of all miracles she'll be able to hear me and wake up!

Going into the room and looking at her, I saw that the doctor was right. Needles were everywhere; there was a heart monitor and a machine giving oxygen to Bella. I sat down beside her. Staring down at the broken angel in front of me. Wishing it was me instead of her.

"Bella, beautiful, it's me. I'm so sorry at what's happened to you. You're so good and strong, you don't deserve this happening to you. It should be me in your place. This is my fault and I'm so sorry for that. I'm sorry for everything I've done; it's just that you're my first love. My first everything. I love you so much, I'm so sorry." I sobbed while holding her hand, squeezing it tightly. I wish she could squeeze back and tell me everything's okay.

"Please wake-up, please. I miss you, I need you. Wake-up, love. Wake-up." I stroked her smooth ivory cheek and kissed her forehead.

**Bella POV**

My head throbbed with pain. I can't open my eyes but I hear people screaming things.

"She's waking up! Give her anesthesia!" A bunch of needles pierced my skin then another and I blacked out.

Slowly, I felt consciousness take over my body, fluttering my eyes open I saw that I was in a meadow. What a beautiful meadow it is! So filled with life, filled with beauty. It was a perfect circle, there were little animals everywhere, and flowers of all color were in bloom. The sunlight hit the entire meadow perfectly it looked as if it was the Garden of Eden. So beautiful.

I sat myself down right in the middle of the place and finally looked down at what I was wearing. It was an old white gown that looked like a hospital gown. Why am I wearing something so ugly? It doesn't matter; I should enjoy this meadow while I can.

Therefore, following my advice, I basked in the sunlight for who knows how long. It was lovely! I feel like I can just sit in this sunlight forever!

My head pounded painfully. It's as if I'm supposed to know something but I'm missing out. Then something clicked. Where is everybody? Why am I the only one here? Shouldn't there be other people? But, where am I in the first place?

The wind blew my hair around and all the little animals started jumping about. Watching them frolicking around made me forget all my worries. It made me forget everything except the animals. They were so cute!

I don't know how long I've been playing with the animals and enjoying the sun and the meadow but I'm starting to get scared. Why am I here all alone?

I feel so lonely. Sure, I have the animals with me but there's only one of me and thousands of them. The sunlight crept out and shined down on my face, as if giving me reassurance, courage. I smiled.

Suddenly, out of nowhere, I felt a raindrop on my face. Not long after, it was pouring! But there seemed to be no way of getting out of the rain! The trees made a barricade around the perfect meadow circle. It rained hard for a while and soon it subsided to a slight drizzle. That's when I heard it. I heard an angelic voice.

"Wake up, love. Wake up." I wanted to tell him that I'm already awake! I wanted to say something but I couldn't reply. My head started hurting again. I couldn't take it!

I succumbed to the dark once again.

**Edward POV**

It's been two weeks since she's been brought to the hospital and nothing! No progress. Nothing.

Everyone's seen her by now. All except one person. Jacob. My fists clench at just the thought of him. He was with Bella when she got into the accident. Sure it's my fault that she left the office but he was there with her! He should have done something! If he ever shows up here, I'm going to kill him.

"Mr. Cullen, family, I'd like to inform you that Bella has woken up!" Everybody smiled and cheered at that. My mind became numb. She woke up. Bella woke up. She's alive. Everything's okay!

"Can we see her? How is she?" Alice was about to barge into the room when the doctor stopped her.

"No, no, I'm afraid everything's not okay yet. You see, she wakes up and then falls back again. Her mind is having trouble staying conscious. We have to run some tests and see, uh, how she is mentally." The doctor looked uncomfortable telling all of us this. He also told us that we couldn't see her because she fell back again and they don't know when she'll be around but when she does come around, they have to be there for it. Depending on how bad things are, they might even have to perform surgery on her.

My poor Bella, she might have to go through surgery! The guilt hasn't subsided for even a second in the past two weeks. The flashbacks keep coming. Her look, her smile, her laugh, her scream, her eyes, her touch, her kisses. They never leave me alone!

"How is she? I called the hospital and they told me she woke but fell back again! Did you meet her? Did she say anything?" We all looked up as the one person I despise most besides myself came running into the hospital. Jacob Black.

"What are _you _doing here?!" I pulled him aside so my family wouldn't witness this.

"What do you mean? I've known her most of her life, why wouldn't I be here?" I fumed at his words.

"Where were you these past two weeks?! Where were you when she got hit with the baseball?!" His eyes hardened.

"I was at home because I don't think I could stand being here! I feel guilty beyond life, okay! What was I supposed to do then? The baseball could have hit either one of us but it hit her! It's not exactly my fault, we were both turned away!" How could he say that?

"There was plenty you could have done! Here's a thought, moved her aside! I don't care what you thought or if it caught you by surprise! She's my wife and when someone is with her, I expect them to make sure no harm befalls her! I don't care if it was a baseball or a meteor from outer space coming and hitting her! When you're with her, I expect her to be in safe hands! I also expect her to come back in the perfect condition I leave her in! Not get stuck in a coma! Just leave, get out before I force you out!" He didn't even reply but just left.

Smart kid, if he stayed any longer I would have attacked him.

"That was harsh, Edward. Completely uncalled for." My dad came and put a soothing hand on my shoulder. I guess they heard everything.

"It's how I feel. I don't care." Pushing his hand away and disregarding the doctor's orders, I went into Bella's room. She's the only person that can calm me down. Even though she's not exactly awake, hearing her breathe and looking at her calms me down. I think I've spent every waking second in this room other then the times Alice forces me home.

When I sat down and looked at her. Everything was different! It wasn't like before when she looked deathly pale and on the verge of being gone forever! I've seen her sleeping too many times to know the difference between them! She's sleeping right now! The doctor lied!

Her breathing grew shallow and rapid, as if she were fighting to stay partially in this world. Taking her hand, I screamed in my head with all my might for her to wake. As I gently placed my head next to her stomach, still holding her hand, I felt it. Her hand squeezed mine. She was waking! Tears of joy fell down my cheeks.

Her eyes opened and she looked around herself in bewilderment. Looking around the room, her eyes finally landed on me and confusion covered them.

"Who are you?" It all dawned on me. The doctor's sympathy, his lie, her confusion, her words. My beautiful darling wife has _amnesia_.

**At least she woke up, right? Hehehe, I promise to update ASAP! So sorry for all that has happened to Bella but there is all good reason for it… And for those of you who are confused in BPOV when she wakes up, it's not for real, that is what is happening inside her head during the coma. I hope you liked this chapter! =]]**


	6. All About Me

**Thank-you all for the awesome reviews!! I know I'm laying it hard on Edward but don't worry, it'll all get better! Enjoy :)**

**Chapter 6: All About Me**

**Bella POV**

"Who are you?" This gorgeous man was staring at me with tears in his eyes. Why is he crying? He had bronze hair and sparkling emerald green eyes. Gorgeous. Wait, he isn't crying over me is he? I don't even know how I got into the hospital.

At my question, he looked shocked at first then more tears sprang into his eyes and he held onto my arm as if his life depended on it.

"No, no, no! This can't be happening! You know who I am, you know who you are, why can't you remember, Bella?!"

"Who's Bella? What am I supposed to know?" Wrong thing to say because he kept shouting 'no, no, no'. Tears fell down his face like a waterfall; I don't want him to cry! Trying to soothe him, I put my hands on his face and attempted to calm him down and stop the tears.

"Please don't cry, I didn't mean to make you cry. It's just, I don't know who I am or who you are or who anybody is! I don't even know why I'm in a hospital. Could you please explain to me?" More tears watered down his face but before he could reply, the door burst open and a tiny woman with spiky black hair came in. She looked like a pixie. Followed by her was a tall man with blonde hair, an enormous man with huge muscles and curly brown hair, a tall woman with blonde hair who looked like a goddess, a petite woman with caramel colored hair, and lastly was another man with blonde hair who looked handsome but old. Who are these people?

"Bella!" The woman with spiky black hair called out and came rushing to me but when she saw the sadness in the bronze haired man's face she looked perplexed. All of them started to murmur excitedly and I couldn't understand why. I tried to get their attention.

"Excuse me?" As soon as I spoke the room became silent; since I had their attention, I continued.

"Sorry to bother but, um, who are you people?" I bit my lip nervously and as soon as I finished speaking they all looked shocked and a little bit upset. It looked like they coordinated it but one minute they all were staring at me and the next at the bronze haired man next to me.

"Edward? Why did she just say that?" Once again the tiny woman spoke. It seems the bronze haired man's name is Edward. That suits him nicely, I like it.

"Edward! What is wrong with her?! I'm talking to you!" The tiny woman got violent and shoved Edward roughly. Hey! That's not nice.

"Stop that! Can't you see he's upset over something? So stop pushing him! Leave him alone." At my outburst everyone turned to look at me again. For some unexplainable reason, I blushed furiously. Why are they staring at me? I only defended him.

"You know it would be really nice to know why my sister in law has no clue what's going on! What the hell happened, Edward?" The blonde goddess came up and glared menacingly at Edward. In a quiet voice, so quiet that I didn't think I heard it, he said:

"She has amnesia." Everyone did a collective gasp at that. Amna what?!

"What did you say? I have what?" He turned his tear stained, piercing green eyes on me and suddenly I felt as if the breath was knocked out of me.

"You have amnesia. Memory loss. You don't know who you are, who we are, and nothing but the basic stuff and then some. For example, you should most likely know how to read, write, walk, and talk." Another man came into the room and answered. He looked like a doctor.

"Why didn't you tell us?! Why did you pretend like she fell back into a coma?! You have no right to withhold information like this from us! From _me_! I am her—

"Calm down, Edward, please follow me outside and I'll explain." Bewildered and concerned, everyone followed the doctor outside, leaving me in this room all alone. The doctor must be explaining what he didn't tell them all before; apparently I was in a coma, whatever that is.

I wish I had a mirror so I can see what I look like. All I know is that I have pale skin and brown hair. With nothing else to do, I looked around the room until my eyes landed on the door. Maybe I can listen in…

"I'm sorry I haven't explained this before but I didn't think it was the right time to tell you all. Now as I've said before, you are all her friends. Nothing more and nothing less."

"But doctor, I'm her hu—

"_Best friend_. Edward you must understand, she's in a very delicate state right now. She's very fragile. Besides, she's pregnant." Another collected gasp sounded at this. I don't know what pregnant is exactly but apparently it's not good to be it.

"She's WHAT?! She can't be! You know we've never…I've never…we…" Edward's voices screamed outrage, is being pregnant that bad? Must be…

"Hahaha, I'm kidding! Goodness, I'm trying to lighten the mood here; you all look as if she died! Be happy, merry! Your Bella has survived, awake, sure she may not remember anything but at least she's awake! This is a miracle; I hope you all know that!" The footsteps of the doctor, I'm assuming, started to gradually fade away followed by the outrage of everybody.

I ran back to the bed just seconds before everyone re-entered the room looking somber. Why do they look so bad? At least I'm not pregnant!

"Hey, are you okay? Does anything hurt? Feel bad?" The tiny woman came up to me and looked at me as if I were made of glass.

"Um, I'm fine except for the fact that I have no idea who any of you are except Edward because you guys called him that. By the way, that's a nice name, I like it." I smiled at Edward much to the shock of everyone. Okay, that is so getting old right now.

"Okay, okay, whatever, let's move on. My name is Alice, this is my boyfriend Jasper, his brother Emmett, Emmett's wife Rosalie, their mother and father Carlisle and Esme, and lastly you of course know Edward who is also Carlisle and Esme's son." Alice pointed everyone out as she said their names but the information just became too much, my head pounded in my brain with pain. Wobbling, I fell back on my bed clutching my head like crazy.

"What's wrong? Are you okay? What happened? What hurts? Should I get the doctor?" Edward came up to me, his hands hovering over me, afraid to touch me I guess.

"No, uh, it's just my head. It hurts a lot, I can't remember your names, I'm sorry. I think it's too much information to take in. Sorry." I really do feel sorry; I don't mean to be such a burden to these people. Edward looked extremely angry for some reason.

"Alice! You should have been more careful! That is way too much information for her to take in right now. You know what the doctor said! We stress her too much and she might slip back into her coma or have faint spells on and off!"

"Stop it Edward! Anyone could have made that mistake. Nothing's happened so let's just move on." The younger blonde man spoke this time; he had a hint of a southern accent in his voice.

"I'm sorry, are you all fighting about me? You seem like a really strong family, I don't want to be a burden so, um, if you don't mind then, uh, if you could direct me to where I live, I'll be out of your lives. I don't mean to be a burden…" I trailed off because they were all giving me disbelieving looks. What now?

"No! You're not a burden, please, you could never be! Besides, you are a part of this family." Everyone turned to glare at Edward for some reason; I think he's just being nice, why would they glare?

"Okay, thanks for the support, Edward, but, um, how exactly am I a part of all this?" Again, everyone glared at Edward until the tiny woman, whose name I think is Alice, responded.

"I can see the confusion, so my name is Alice, just to remind you. You are a part of this family because you and I have been best friends since were in diapers! And that would be about 24 years ago!" So I'm 24 years old; that's something I should keep in mind.

"So we've known each other a really long time! But the rest of you, wow, thank-you so much for worrying about me even though I'm just Alice's friend! You guys must be really nice people."

"Yea, uh, about where you live, you live with me! Jasper here, lives with us too because he's my boyfriend but we share an apartment." She pointed out Jasper to me, which turned out to be the young blonde haired man who spoke earlier!

"She lives with you and Jasper?!" Edward spoke in an angered tone; I don't want him to be upset anymore.

"That's right, Edward, she lives with us, always has." Alice spoke through clenched teeth. I can see that they don't really like each other…

"Edward?" The moment I called his name, Edward turned to me and his expression softened immediately. He seems sweet.

"Yes?"

"Well, I trust you guys so much because apparently you're family and they don't lie to each other. Knowing that I have no relation to you besides Alice, it's really nice of you to care about me. But…Alice said I lived with her and Jasper so don't be angered. Please don't be upset about it." I touched his arm in a comforting manner and he seemed to visibly calm down instantaneously, everyone else chuckled at this.

"Thank-you, Bella." He smiled a stunning crooked smile. Wait, he called me Bella!

"Is that my name?" They all looked stunned that I didn't know my name but nodded anyways.

"Yes, your full name is Isabella Swan-Cu, I mean your name is Isabella Swan but you liked to be called Bella." Alice replied for me.

"Are we all done, here? If you would like to take her home then I just need Edward to sign these papers." The doctor came back into the room, everyone glared at him, but they didn't say anything. He said Edward had to sign papers, I wonder why.

"Wait! Why does Edward have to sign papers for me to leave?" I shocked all of them once again, what am I saying that makes them react this way? I'm just wondering why Alice wouldn't sign my papers. Hold it! Shouldn't I have parents?

"Well, um, that's a good question! We need everyone to sign papers for you since they've been here so long and Edward's the only one who hasn't yet." Oh, okay that answers that one.

"But, where are my parents? Shouldn't they have to sign something too?" They all looked panicked and scared at my questioning.

"I'm your father, dear, uh, we've already signed everything." The old blonde haired man stepped forward holding the waist of the lady with caramel hair. So she must be my mother…

"You're my dad and you're my mom?" They both nodded as I pointed them out.

"But wait, aren't you Jasper's mom? Is Jasper my brother?" Again, they all looked stressed and weary to answer me.

"No, not exactly. You see, after your parents, uh, passed away a couple years ago, Carlisle and I, my name is Esme, took you in. After a while, I guess you started to feel like we were your parents because to some extent we are." Okay, that kind of clears things up. I don't have real parents but there are two adults that care about me nonetheless, it's all good.

"Are you all ready to leave, sweet—Bella? Yea, ready to leave sweet Bella?" Edward came back into the room, acting very weird. Why did he just call me sweet Bella? The whole room besides me glared at him while I looked at him in puzzlement.

"Ha! You might be wondering why I just called you that! Ha! Well, uh, good wondering! Uh, I called you that because, uh, in the year that I've known you, um, you've been very sweet so we came up with a nickname for you. Sweet Bella!" Everyone looked at him in bewilderment, I don't know why though! I think that is very…sweet!

"Wow, that's so nice of you!" I hugged Edward much to his enjoyment because he hugged me back but Alice looked horrified for some reason.

"Okay, time to go home now! Come on, Bella!" Alice started tugging on my arm to get me away from Edward when he replied.

"Time to go to her apartment, Alice? Did you make sure her room is in tip top condition?" He smirked at her while she looked scared for her life. What did he say?

"Her room! Edward Anthony give me your house keys right now and go take Bella somewhere! But first, change into these Bella; so much better than a hospital gown! I cannot have you running around in _that_! You know what? Come with me for a second!" I know that Alice is really nice from the last 10 minutes or so that I've known her but why do I, all of a sudden, feel scared of her? I silently pleaded Edward to help me with my eyes but he just smiled apologetically.

An hour later, just about I think, Edward and I were walking inside a fancy looking restaurant because I felt hungry.

"How many?" A waitress came up to us.

"Two and private, please." Edward smiled crookedly at the waitress who seemed to go into a daze at that. For some reason I got angry at him for that. Why did he put that waitress into a daze just to get his way? As we sat down at our _private_ table, I called him out on it.

"That wasn't very nice." He looked up at me innocently.

"What?"

"You smiled and somehow put that waitress into a daze just to get what you want!"

"I only asked her nicely, it's not my fault that she listened to me." Impossible! This man is impossible! He just doesn't get it. Wait, why am I so angry at him for something so simple?

"You know, I really like what you're wearing, it suits you nicely." Pointing down at my outfit, he smiled again. Alice had forced me into this outfit. It was only some jeans with a t-shirt that was really tight and a sweater on top that she didn't let me button up. I guess it's okay. I also got a chance to look at myself; I won't say I'm pretty but I'm not ugly. Brown hair and brown eyes with a pale face; just a plain Jane.

"Thanks." I felt it again. At Edward's compliment and smile I blushed but I did it again. I seem to do that a lot with him.

"So, does your head hurt right now?" Concern was flooding his eyes like crazy; why does he care so much? Whatever, it's nice of him.

"Um, no. But I do have questions!"

"Okay, shoot. I'll try to answer as many as I can."

"Cool, do you know what my favorite color is?" This feeling of excitement filled me; I can't wait to learn about myself!

"Well, you don't have a favorite color. For you, it changes day to day depending on your mood."

"Cool, I remember Alice said that I'm 24 years old so, uh, I must be done with school, do I have a job?"

"Yes, you work with my dad, Carlisle's, publishing company. You're an editor and technically I'm your boss." My eyes widened at this! I'm having dinner with my boss!

"You're my boss?!" He chuckled and smiled at this.

"Yes, but no worries. You're not being evaluated now or anything." That makes me feel slightly better but does he expect me back at work soon? I'm not quite sure what my job is…

"Will you be expecting me to come back to work soon?" Horror overcame his face at my question.

"No! No! Of course not! You just recovered, I don't expect you back to work for at least a year." A year?!

"A year?! Won't I lose my job if I don't come for so long?" He smirked slightly but said no anyways.

"You won't lose your job because I won't allow you to come back until a year."

"Good Evening, my name is Steve and I'll be your server tonight. Is there anything I can get you?" The waiter came to our table but he looked at me the whole time he was talking. From the corner of my eyes, I saw Edward glaring at him fiercely. Just then I realized that I should have been looking at the menu, not talking to Edward! So I picked the first thing I saw on the menu.

"Mushroom Ravioli, please." Reluctantly, it seemed, the waiter turned to Edward.

"The same thing with two cokes." Writing it all down, the waiter left.

"Why were you glaring at him?"

"Nothing, um, I wasn't glaring." Out of nowhere, Edward smiled and laughed a little much to my confusion.

"Sorry, but you ordered the same exact thing on our first date." His eyes widened in horror before he continued, stuttering.

"I mean, on our first date that we came here! Alice, the family, you, and I, we all came here and that's the same thing you ordered!"

"Funny…" I trailed off as Steve came back with the cokes, winking at me quickly before he left.

"So, will you tell me all about me?" Edward jerked his head up at that.

"Of course, what would you like to know?"

"Um, everything! Tell me everything you know about me."

"Everything? Um, I'll try. You like the smell of strawberries, you are slightly health conscious, you think you're not beautiful when you are very much an attractive woman, uh, then, uh, your favorite color changes from day to day, your all time favorite book is _Wuthering Heights_, although you do like classics such as _Romeo and Juliet_. Um, you also like listening to classic music, Debussy's Claire De Lune is your favorite. You don't like shopping or dressing up but Alice makes you do it anyways and you like cooking. That's all I know…" He knows a lot about me! Mostly things right now, too bad he doesn't know my past…I really want to know what growing up was like. Maybe I can ask Alice later!

"What about boys? Am I in a relationship? Did I get out of one?" Edward looked like a frog the way his eyes widened!

"I-I, um, I don't really know anything about that…Ask Alice!" Just then the food arrived and since I was so hungry, we ate dinner in silence.

After we finished, Edward took me to someone's apartment. I'm guessing it's mine and Alice's.

"Is this where I live?" It seemed really big, the apartment and I haven't even gone inside!

"Yes, wait, no, I mean no! No, you don't live here. I'm sorry I accidentally took you to my apartment, ha; I guess I'm just used to coming here…" Okay…He is really strange.

"Can you take me to where I live?" His cell phone rang at that moment and I didn't pay attention as he talked with whoever was on the phone. I looked around his car; it was a shiny silver Volvo with a leather interior.

"Ready?" I jumped as Edward's voice startled me awake from day dreaming about nothing. I think I'm losing it!

"Yeah, sorry." He pulled out of the driveway and drove in silence to I'm assuming where I live.

"Bella!" Alice came running out of the building as Edward parked.

"Hi, Alice! We live here, right?"

"Correct!" This apartment building looked slightly smaller than Edward's but huge nonetheless.

"You have to go now, Edward, right?" She spoke to him pointedly and in response he sighed and left without a goodbye.

"Is something wrong with him, Alice?"

"No, no, nothing! He's just moody a lot. Anyways, want to see your room?!" At first I felt bad for whatever was bothering Edward but Alice's cheery mood brought me out of it as she led me inside the apartment.

The whole inside looked absolutely amazing! The walls were painted a lime green and there was black furniture. It seemed very chic.

"Wow, it looks amazing Alice!" She beamed at me and led me straight to what I'm guessing is my room.

"This is your room! Sorry, if it seems boring or anything but before your, uh, accident we were going to change stuff around. We could do it now, if you like…" My room looked very soothing, comfortable. The walls were painted a light blue, my bed had a black frame with royal blue sheets and there were a bunch of bookshelves filled with books. That was about it. Other than a writing desk, I guess I only like to read.

Alice left me as I got re-acquainted with my room. I scoured through the bookshelves; each and every book was tattered as if it was used a lot. There were books such as _Pride and Prejudice_, _Much Ado About Nothing_, _Of Mice and Men_, _Romeo and Juliet_, _Macbeth_, _Hamlet_, _Wuthering Heights_, and much more.

There was also a window near my bed; it out looked the driveway. I also had my own private bathroom and that was my room! Nothing too special about it but it's really nice.

"Alice?" I called out for her because I have no idea where she is.

"Hey! I was just about to watch a movie; Jasper is going to sleep over with Edward tonight to give us some private girl talk!"

"Can I ask you some questions about me?" At that, Alice immediately stopped messing around with the TV and sat on the couch.

"What's up, Bella?"

"Could you tell me a little about me? Edward told me some basic stuff but I want to know more! You said we knew each other our whole lives, what am I like?" She smiled happily at this.

"Well, you're a very kind hearted person. You always want everyone else to be happy before yourself. Very altruistic of you. Um, you're very beautiful but you refuse to admit that to anyone. Let's see, you're a hard worker and you've worked hard all of your life for the things you want. You—

"Could you tell me about my past?" She stopped talking altogether and looked at me.

"Hey, Bella! Oh, wow! Look at the time! It's time to go to sleep!" It was only nine o' clock but Alice said it was time to go to sleep. I guess I'm an early sleeper.

Alice handed me some pajamas and I quickly changed and got into my bed.

In my dreams, I was yelling at a man. It felt like I did that a lot with him but I was so angry that my body was shaking! Words couldn't be heard to me because I was watching myself and some man in the shadows arguing. I'm missing something. Who is this man?

Suddenly the man in the shadows disappeared and I saw this tall man with silky black hair and russet skin.

**I know this didn't really seem like a chapter but I needed a filler. There were clues in this chapter to what's coming but yea…I hope you liked it! =]]**


	7. The Past

**Hey all! Thanks for the reviews, you are awesome! To clear up some confusion:**

**Bella is NOT pregnant, the doctor was joking when he said that to try and get everyone to relax, I know it's a stupid joke but yea…**

**Bella will definitely get her memory back soon enough, nobody is saying anything about her right now because her brain is in unstable condition, and if they fill her in on everything then she might fall back into a coma. As the doctor said before, she's had too many concussions so one more injury is really bad for her.**

**I know Alice seems pretty mean right now but honestly if your sibling or best friend fell into a coma, I don't think that you would be all sunshine, it's just my opinion. She will get nicer but she's really stressed out and worried for Bella now.**

**Also, some of you don't like the coma and amnesia but in my opinion Edward's and Bella's relationship can grow by the fact that she doesn't know anything. Of course, she will remember everything soon enough but not yet. Anyways, she really hated Edward a lot for being a jerk, she knew she had an attraction to him but she didn't like him because he was so mean to her. Again, if your worst enemy suddenly wanted to be your best friend, would you be so open with them? I think not, you would probably be cautious around them first. **

**Sorry for the long A/N but it had to be done to clear up the questions. Now on with the story!! Enjoy :)**

**Chapter 7: The Past**

**Edward POV**

She's not here. My beautiful wife is with Alice in her apartment and I'm here all alone. I can't believe I accidentally took her here by mistake! That was a close one. If not for Alice and the doctor then I would have told her everything. But the doctor told us all that in her past she got injured too many times—I winced just thinking about how many times my Bella got hurt and I wasn't there—and now once more she got a concussion. We're in dangerous territory; if she falls into another coma then she might not ever come back. So we have to be careful with the information we give her; we can't tell her too much all at once. We especially can't tell her that I'm her husband because of how much my Bella didn't like me. I was a big influence in her life and simply telling her about me might cause a breakdown in her brain.

Now Alice is so over protective of her. I honestly wish I'm the one to take care of her right now but no Alice is. Since she knew Bella the longest, she insists on taking care of her; besides what about the questions Bella might have that I can't answer. About her past. About her parents…

Bella's past is something I really do not want her to know about. She's gone through so much hurt and pain.

"Edward are you okay? You've been in Bella's room for over an hour." Jasper staying with me for the week; not only for moral support for me but also a chance for Bella and Alice to talk.

"I'm fine. Why did this happen? Jasper, can you tell me that?" He looked at me with sympathy

"Sometimes things happen for a reason, I'm sorry but I can't tell you the answer to your question." This made me angry; I even knocked a chair down in my fury.

"Why?! Bella is the sweetest person in the entire world! Why did this happen to her? Why did all of that shit in her past happen to her?! She doesn't deserve any of this! She deserves to be in a mansion, she deserves to be treated like a queen, and she deserves to have her prince charming! But instead in a drunken stupid we got married and she hates me, her whole life she's had to work hard for everything, she fell into a coma and woke up with amnesia! And sooner or later she's going to get her memory back and remember all the crap that's happened in her life! It's not fair!" Tears were spilling down my eyes and Jasper continued looking at me with sadness in his eyes.

"I'm sorry, Edward. There's nothing we can do about any of it. What's happened has happened and we have to move on from all of this. We have to work with what we have. Bella has had a very bad life but she's survived. She's a strong girl and I have a feeling that you are her prince charming, Edward. She may not know it or think it but I know that you are, everyone else agrees too. I'm sure that if she regains her memory then she'll be just as strong as she was when it actually happened."

"How could you say that? Don't you remember what she was like when her parents committed suicide?! When she found out?! If Alice wasn't there I don't know what she would be like right now! What if she can't handle it? What if something goes wrong this time?"

"Edward there are too many 'what-ifs' to count, we just have to handle everything as it comes. Nothing will go wrong. Just calm down." After that, Jasper left the room. I guess he could see that I wouldn't be moving any time soon. Bella is my life and knowing that she doesn't remember her past but will soon enough it hurts.

I set myself up on Bella's bed and thought about what Alice told me about Bella's past. It definitely hasn't been easy.

_Flashback _

_"Yes, sir." Bella left my office portraying serenity but inside I knew she was fuming. I smirked as I heard her scream in the distance but not even a minute later Alice was at my door. _

_"What the hell, Edward?! You just gave her extra work to do that you have all weekend to do! Seriously what is your problem?! Don't you know what happened?!" Alice stopped talking, her eyes widened in horror as if she said something she isn't supposed to. I know Bella's only been here six months but I really feel like I'm in love with her so what Alice said definitely has something to do with her._

_"What happened? Is she hurt? Does she have a disease? What?!" Alice's eyes narrowed into slits. _

_"Edward, I know that you think you love her but treating her this way is not the way to go about it! This is so elementary school! Go out there and apologize to her!" _

_"Stop trying to change the subject, what happened?!" Her eyes filled with grief and regret. _

_"Alice tell me right now!" I probably shouldn't be yelling at her right now but it must be bad if she can't just out right tell me. Tears watered down her face._

_"Edward, Bella's…Jacob's dad called yesterday." Jacob? What does that mongrel have anything to do with Bella? Alice continued on, ignoring the tears now. _

_"Jacob's dad is really close friends with Bella's parents and…and, Jake told me that…that her parents committed suicide the day before yesterday. On their wedding anniversary and Bella's birthday. She doesn't know yet, we're trying to figure out a way to tell her." Suddenly we heard a gasp and a bunch of things clattering to the floor. Bella overheard Alice talking. _

_"NO! They can't! They said that no matter what they loved me! They can't! No!" Bella ran away, forgetting everything. I was about to follow her but Alice stopped me. _

_"I'll get her." I plumped down on my chair. I can't believe this. Bella's parents committed suicide? Why would they do that?! I remember Bella's birthday perfectly, I left flowers and chocolate for her on her desk along with a diamond bracelet. Anonymously, of course. She had smiled when she saw them. _

_I didn't give her too much work to do because it was her birthday and I remember that in the middle of the day she got two phone calls. One after the other. Right after she had smiled like she won the lottery. I found out later, from Alice, that her parents had called telling her happy birthday and that they loved her. I can't believe that they committed suicide after that! How could they do something like that to Bella?! _

_It's been a couple days since Bella found out. I gave her the rest of the month off to grieve but according to Alice, Bella's been a zombie. Rose and Alice have to spoon feed Bella to get her to eat, they have to force her into the bathroom, and they have to give her sedatives to get her to sleep. I'm worried about her; I hope she doesn't get too depressed. Bella doesn't deserve this type of tragedy. How could her parents do this?! I just can't imagine it. _

_"Alice? Can I talk to you for a second?" She stopped mid way to Jasper's office and backtracked to mine. _

_"Yes, Edward?" She didn't look too happy; she looked like she needed sleep very badly. _

_"What happened in Bella's past?" That question must have surprised her because she grasped her chest and fell back on a chair with wide eyes. _

_"Why do you ask?" _

_"I know something happened, Alice. Bella has fallen into major depression and what she said the days he found out. It doesn't make any sense. She's always been so strong and this has completely ruined her! Can you please tell me?" I felt bad because Alice didn't reply, instead she broke down crying. Patting her back gently, I tried to calm her down but the tears kept coming and coming. _

_Finally after almost an hour of crying, Alice answered. _

_"She was never loved." _

_End Flashback_

**Bella POV**

Almost a week has passed since I came back from the hospital. Nobody would tell me anything about my life or my past; they would only tell me things about myself. They have also kept me locked up in Alice's apartment, except for when Edward comes. He always takes me out to fun places.

"Bella? Honey, you need to eat. Why are you staring off into space?" I snapped to and looked at Alice who had a spoon and bowl of soup in her hands. Oh, it's lunch time.

"Sorry, um, I was just thinking." Her forehead creased with worry. That always happened when I told her that I was thinking. They're afraid I'll get my memory back but I don't know why. What could have happened in my life that's got them all worried?

"Bella! You need to eat! I don't want you to get sick or something so grab that spoon and eat!" Rosalie yelled at me. She hasn't exactly been hospitable but she hasn't been mean either. She always did the best things for me but in her own style and before she could yell again, I grabbed my spoon and started slurping up the hot tomato soup that Esme made for me.

"So what did you dream about last night? You still haven't told us." Esme walked into the room smiling. You see, everyday I would tell everyone about my dreams—everyone being Esme, Alice, and Rosalie. The guys always had work to do so I didn't see much of them. Except Edward, I almost always saw him. It's so sweet of him to really care about me; he even gave me a year of no work!

"Last night, I dreamt about a park." The ladies froze when I told them this. Is something wrong with the park? Alice nervously told me to continue.

"Well, it was a beautiful park! I wish I could go there but anyways I was there with someone. I couldn't see him properly but it was a boy and he was walking with me. Then out of nowhere the scene changes from the park to nothing then to the hospital when I woke up. I don't know but it feels like I'm missing something there, as if I'm supposed to know something but I don't." Silence filled the room, everyone looked so tense.

"I'm sorry but did I say something wrong?" Esme got out of it first and answered me.

"No, of course not! That must have been a lovely park! How do you like the soup?"

"Yes! It was really good; you're such a good cook Esme! I can't believe that I don't remember your cooking, it's absolutely amazing!" She blushed at my compliment and continued eating her own soup.

"No offense but I think that was a silly dream. You should forget about it." Rosalie threw her two cents in but I don't think it was stupid. In my gut I know it's important. I'm supposed to know something about the park, a boy, blackness, and the hospital. They somehow all connect.

"Bella! Let's go shopping!" Random but I've gotten used to Alice and her oddity by now. Just the mention of shopping had my stomach in knots though. So far I've only gone once with Alice and it's a nightmare! She makes me try on so many clothes and forces me to so many shops I feel like I'm dead by the end of the day!

"No, Alice, I think I want to stay and finish reading my book." Ever since Edward told me that I loved reading, my goal became to read all of the books I have. I've only finished four books now but I'm almost done with my fifth; it's just that Alice keeps bothering me.

"Nope! You've been reading for the past three days! Now it's time to go shopping besides all of your clothes are so last year! We need to get you a new wardrobe!" If there's one thing I've learned, it's to never to deny Alice anything especially when it comes to shopping. Maybe I can ask if Edward can come, he always makes everything better.

"I'll go but can Edward come too?" Whenever I mentioned Edward everyone always looked really weird but whatever, he's awesome! The only problem is whenever I'm around him, I feel like I'm supposed to be angry but I don't know why. He's really sweet and caring and an all around awesome person!

"Um, sure, why don't you call him? He might have work to do seeing as how it's Friday and still a working day." Ignoring Alice, I called Edward.

"Hello? Edward Cullen speaking."

"Hi, Edward, it's Bella. Can I ask you something?" I could sense his joy through the phone, he always seemed very happy around me, that's what I liked about him a lot.

"Hey Bella! Of course, ask me anything."

"Alice wants me to go shopping but I don't want to go unless you come. Are you too busy to come with me?"

"No, I'm never too busy! The publishing deadline is the day after tomorrow but I can always get my assistant to do some work for me. Tell Alice that I'll meet you guys at the mall, okay?"

"Okay, thank-you Edward!"

"Anything for you, sweet— sweet Bella. I'll see you then." He's taken to calling me sweet Bella for some reason but I think he's the one who deserves that nickname! Edward always does anything I ask him to; it's so nice of him!

"What did he say?" I looked up at Alice who had an interesting expression on her face that I couldn't quite make-out but whatever.

"He said he'll meet us there."

"Great! Let's go." Do I detect sarcasm in her voice? Alice is very unique, I guess.

At the mall, Alice was a tornado! She would jump from shop to shop quickly and every time we entered one a split second later I would see her with a bunch of clothes that she would have me try on.

Edward and Alice didn't really get along seeing as how they kept fighting every five minutes. He keeps saying that we should take a break and she should slow down but then she would retort with the fact that the mall closes in three hours and we need to get me a new wardrobe so she has to work fast. I didn't really care; Edward kept me company so it wasn't so bad.

"Bella! You've been in there for five minutes now, are you done changing?" Alice had me change into a light blue sweater dress that she thought would be perfect for me, even though summer was about to start she said that I'd need it for later. I came out and she squealed.

"That's perfect! Now go change! We're buying that!" I changed back into my t-shirt and jeans quickly and came out to see that Alice was already at the cash register. Edward smiled at me and I smiled back, but I do feel bad for him. He has to carry all the bags, all of _my_ shopping bags.

"Edward do want me to help carry the bags? You have almost 20 bags with you and another one is coming!" In response he smiled again and shook his head.

"No, it's fine. Bella there is a reason I work out at the gym. I don't need help." I rolled my eyes at him. He's so chivalrous at times it can get very annoying but still sweet. You don't see that many gentlemen around these days. In a way, I feel like Edward is my prince charming. He doesn't treat like I'm his employee; he treats me like a queen at times. At least, that's what it feels like.

Three hours later, we were told by security that we had to leave the mall because it was closing. It's only eight but I guess they're closing early today, much to Alice's dismay.

"You know, Alice, you have a real addiction. I think you should try quitting shopping and letting someone else do it for you." Alice gasped at Edward's comment.

"Are you kidding me?! How can I give up shopping?! Especially when Bella wanders off into her mind?! She's always doing nothing and shopping fills the void!" Even though I could understand what Alice was saying, it felt almost as if there was a double meaning to her words.

"So you want to head back to my place? It's closer and I'm way too tired to drive another minute." Before Alice or I could even reply, Edward made the turn that lead straight to his apartment.

"What are you doing, Edward?! I don't want to go there! Stop! Turn around right this instant!" There was true panic in Alice's voice but why?

"Calm down, Alice. I've never been to Edward's apartment so let's go! Besides I really just want to sit down on a couch and drink some much needed coffee. Why are you so afraid?"

"I'm not afraid! It's just that I really want to get home to Jazzy and plus we need to organize your things into your closet!" Edward smirked at Alice from the rearview mirror.

"You can always do that tomorrow, Alice. Besides Bella's never been to my apartment and she wants to see it." Alice's eyes narrowed so that I could barely see them.

"Oh you are so going to pay, Edward Anthony! Don't forget that I'm the one who dressed up your wi—I mean, don't forget that I'm the one who shops for you!" Edward looked horrified at what Alice was saying. These people are crazy!

Before I knew it, I found myself sitting down on Edward's couch after a little tour of the place with a mug of coffee in hand.

"Do you like it?" Edward regarded me with eagerness after the tour.

"Definitely! It's so modern yet retro! But for some reason I get a déjà vu feeling being here with you guys. I know that I've never been here before but it feels like I have." Both of them laughed nervously at my remark. They're hiding something.

I just know that they're not telling me something! All of the Cullens and Alice have been acting weird but I just thought it was their craziness but now I figured it out! They're hiding something from me! Why don't they want me to get my memory back? Isn't it a good thing if I do? I don't want to continue going through life not knowing anything.

"Guys? Can I ask you something completely serious?" That wiped the smile off their faces.

"What is it, Bella?" Edward used a cautious voice as if he was afraid of what was to come.

"Can you tell me about my childhood? About my parents? About my past?"

"No! I mean, um, the doctor told us not to say anything, we need you to remember on your own or you might fall into a coma again." Edward looked almost afraid to say anything to me. But why?! I don't understand this!

"Why not?! It can't be that bad or anything! I want to know, I'm ready to find out! It's not fair! You guys don't understand what I'm going through! I don't know anything and I feel so insecure about myself all the time! It's torture! My head hurts with the knowledge that I should know something but I don't! When you guys have the information why can't you just tell me?! I have a right to know! And, and if you don't tell me then I'll search myself up and find out that way! I've been waiting for you guys to explain to me but it's been a week since I came back from the hospital! Tell me!" Tears had formed in my eyes by now and I was yelling.

"Bella, it's just not the right time. Even though you feel like it's been forever, it's only been a week! Like you said, only a week since you came back. If we tell you everything now, your brain might not be able to take it. We need to give it time to adjust no matter how ready you feel. I swear, we will tell you but when the time is right."

"No! That answer is not good enough! Edward, don't you get it?! I need to know, please! It's not fair! I need to know, I just do! Please?" I got down on my knees in front of Edward; Alice was silent this whole time.

"Fine."

"What?!" Both me and Edward answered, shocked at Alice's acceptance.

"What are you talking about, Alice?! I'm the one who wanted to tell her some of it before but now what are you talking about?! You gave us all a lecture about keeping everything from her and now you relent?! This time, I refuse! You can't tell her and I won't let you!"

"Edward! You have no control over me! Alice wants to tell me so she will! Stay out of it if you don't want to hear!"

"Edward, I know what I said before but we'll tell her what she needs to know, for now. We'll go little by little. I don't agree with telling her now but if we tell her it's a whole lot better then if she goes out and finds out everything on her own." He looked pleadingly at her but she held firm and turned to me.

"Bella, I'm going to tell you about your childhood and parents but that's it. As you will soon find out, it's shocking enough news and we don't want anything bad happening so if it gets too much tell us immediately and we'll stop. Is that agreed?" She seemed so businesslike but as long as I was getting my information, I don't care so I nodded eagerly.

"Okay, your parents' names are Charlie and Renee Swan. They got married right out of high school and a year later they had you. Your hometown is Forks, Washington and it is a tiny little town. The problem comes now, you see, your mom didn't like such a tiny town but your father was in love with it. Five years later, your mom had enough and she left both your father and you. Your dad went into semi depression but he still stuck through for you. But your mom is kind of eccentric, she changes fancies very quickly. One week she'll like one thing but the next she'll hate it. That was her downfall because she couldn't maintain a job. Because of her instability, she came back to your father a year later." Alice decided to pause at this but I was soaking up the information like a sponge.

"Charlie was so happy when she came back! You, Bella, not so much. Since you took care of yourself for so long, you came to resent your mother but you did love her nonetheless. I came into the picture because your parents met my parents when you were born and my parents became your baby sitters. Almost 24/7. When Renee left, Charlie wanted something to remind him of her besides pictures so he always kept you with him but when she came back, my parents resumed their role as your caretakers. Now don't get me mistaken, your parents loved you very much but they were a bit selfish. They weren't ready to be parents." I noticed Edward and Alice started to tear up; the hard part must be coming.

"Your parents ignited their love for each other again and were happy but still your mom wasn't happy with Forks. She even became pregnant again but the baby had a miscarriage and your mom went into a downward spiral. She left your father again. And by now you were entering high school. From the contact you had with your mom once every couple months or so, we concluded that she was depressed. About her lost baby, about her lost love, about her sad life we don't really know. We also never found out how she was living or surviving. That was your mother now here comes your dad. He didn't take her second leave very well. He sort of became a zombie but lived his life nonetheless. Charlie went to work and came home and spent his spare time looking at pictures of your mother. He just stopped caring. You were all on your own but you held strong. You took care of him, took care of yourself. Soon enough you graduated high school and was granted a scholarship to the local college. I went wherever you went so we went to the same college and once we graduated we decided to move to New York because it's always full of so many opportunities. I immediately got a job at a fashion company but you were struggling a bit and when I met Jasper I asked him to get you a job with Edward. Now Bella, this is the hard part so just stick with me. You've been doing great so far. Your birthday…your birthday is September 13 and it is also your parents' wedding anniversary. They called you one day one after the other and wished you happy birthday. But Bella, that night…that night they-they committed suicide." Alice stopped talking as her sobs overtook her body, Edward was silently crying but nothing came for me.

I felt numb. I felt nothing. My head was slightly hurting but this wasn't the type of information I wanted. Of course, I'm happy to know about my past but this is horrible!

The doorbell rang and Edward went up to get it, tears still in his eyes. When the door was thrown wide open, I saw him. The man that was in my dreams! He was tall, with russet skin, and silky black hair. Jacob.

**Wow, that was pretty intense at the end! Sorry for the long paragraphs but I didn't want to keep breaking it down and stuff. I hope this clears up some of the confusion from my previous chapter. I hope you liked it! =]]**


	8. I'm Fine, I Forget

**Hey everyone! Thank you all sooo very much for the awesome reviews! I'm glad the last chapter cleared things up! Now with the situation about Bella's parents' deaths, well they both died near each other without knowing it, creepy huh? Lol, anyways, Enjoy :)**

**Chapter 8: I'm Fine, I Forget**

**Bella POV**

My head started pounding in my brain once again but this time harder. Jacob, I see Jacob. I call him Jake, his last name is Black. He's been my best friend for years. Edward's enemy. Once again I had the odd suspicion that I didn't know something but it was right in front of my nose. Then I remembered that Jake was the person I saw in my dream! Wait, why was I dreaming about him?

By this point I didn't realize that everyone was huddled around me screaming my name, but before I could reply my body gave way and I succumbed to the darkness again.

When I finally woke up after who knows how long, I found myself in the hospital. Edward was sleeping on an uncomfortable looking chair next to my bed and Alice was on the sofa.

"Alice? Edward?" I didn't exactly want to wake them up but I don't quite understand what's happening. For some reason I faintly recall being told about my parents and my past but it doesn't affect me. It's as if my brain hasn't fully comprehended what happened to them. As if I've already moved on without knowing it.

Slowly, day by day I'm getting my memory back. I think. My brain is able to remember things much better now, a prime example being that I can now recall all of my memories that have to do with my parents. They're not much, I barely saw them growing up. Now I just wish I could remember everything else.

"Bella! How long have you been up? Are you okay? Does your head hurt? Do you know who I am?" Edward whispered anxiously to me his worries. He cares so much for me, I can't stop saying it, he's too sweet!

"I'm fine, I'm fine. I didn't get amnesia again; I remember what's happened since I woke up here last week but I also have an inkling about someone named Jacob. Do you know someone with that name?" He stiffened slightly and Alice stirred in her sleep but still remained in dream land.

"Yes, you have a friend named Jacob but he hasn't come to see you until yesterday and that's when you, uh, fainted." His voice was like Alice's before, businesslike.

"Oh, is he here? By the way, where is everybody else?" Dragging my eyes around the room, I just now realized that no one else from the family came here.

"Only Alice and I decided to stay, we didn't want to overwhelm you with all of us when you woke up."

"Is anybody awake in here?" Doctor Gregory came in smiling and whispering like us.

"Hi doctor." I, too, smiled at him and he chuckled quietly turning to Edward.

"See? I told you that she would wake up soon; you worry far too much for your own good Edward. But I guess it is good if you're dealing with Bella here who's had nearly 20 concussions in her life! You are very lucky to have this man, Bella." Doctor Gregory smiled at me as I blushed; he thinks Edward and I are together!

"So, uh, when can I go, doc?" Edward got up from the chair and stood beside my bed with the doctor—looking down at his clipboard—on the other side.

"Well, let's see, just for Edward's benefit why don't we let you stay one more night to make sure everything's running smoothly?" One more night? What am I supposed to do all day if I can't leave the hospital? Call me crazy but I don't want to have anybody else suffer here with me, maybe I can ask Alice to get me some of my books so I could read. As if reading my thoughts, Edward responded accordingly.

"I'll stay to keep you company if you want, I mean I don't really have anything else to do besides work but I don't want to do that…" Crookedly smiling, Edward pleaded with his eyes for me to let him stay.

"You can stay, I don't mind but I don't want you to give up this entire day just to stay with me! If you really don't want to stay, could you bring me my books so that I can read?"

"Of course I want to stay! Anything to spend more time—getting to know the hospital! Yeah, um, you seem to come here a lot so if I stay here maybe I could get more comfortable here, yea…" I looked at him suspiciously—that annoying voice in my head telling me I'm missing something—but shrugged it off anyway.

"Edward? Did Bella wake up yet?" Alice's eyes flickered open and she realized that I was standing right there with the doctor continuing to check my vitals.

"Oh! Hey, Bella! Sorry I dozed off there, what's happened? Aahhh! I'm so glad you woke up!! Gosh, Bella I was so scared! Ugh, I knew I shouldn't have told you! Wait, where is everybody? Weren't they just here?" Man that girl can talk fast! It took Edward and me about five minutes to figure out just what she said as she was still clinging onto me like a madwoman.

"Alice, Alice calm down! First of all, it's morning so everyone except us left last night. Jasper wanted to stay but Esme convinced the rest of them that Bella needs to be surrounded by us first since we spend the most time with her. The doctor said she has to stay here one more night so they can check to make sure everything's okay. So I'm going to stay here, you can go home if you want." I just noticed, the doctor isn't here anymore. Anyways, Alice had an astounded expression on her face at Edward's remark.

"Me? Leave? Are you kidding me?! Bella's my bestest friend in the whole wide world! Why on Earth would I leave her now?!" Suddenly, Jasper came walking through the door with a cup of coffee and Alice squealed 'Jazzy' before flinging herself at him; luckily he placed the coffee on a table seconds before Alice's jump. Quick thinking.

"Good morning to you too, sweetheart." They smiled at each other and pecked the other on the lips, both Edward and I awkwardly looked away but I noticed a sort of pained look in his eye at their display of affection. Maybe he loves someone who doesn't love him back.

"I'm so glad you brought coffee! Are you going to stay with Edward, Bella, and me?" I replied for Jasper on this one.

"No offense, Alice, but, um, you don't have to stay with me. Edward will stay and that's enough for me. I mean I don't want to ruin today for all of you guys so one person is enough for me. And I know that you feel guilty about telling me stuff but I swear, I feel much better after that. I feel like I actually know myself more." I went up to her and hugged my best friend tightly.

"Bella that's not the only reason I want to stay, like I said before, you're my best friend in the entire world! How could I leave you alone at the hospital in a condition like this? I'm staying."

"Alice, please don't be ridiculous! You haven't spent any time with Jasper since last week; go have a special day off to yourselves! And what condition are you talking about? I feel so normal! Sure I can't remember a couple unimportant things—

At that I heard Edward mutter something that sounded similar to 'like our marriage', what is he talking about?

"Sorry, Edward, I didn't hear you." Alice stomped very hard on his foot and while he was doubled over in pain, he answered.

"I said, ouch, um, like, uh, like my favorite color! Psh, you don't know my favorite color but you used to before!" In response I just gave him the 'I think you are crazy but I'm just nodding along' look and continued on.

"As I was saying, I can't remember some things but thanks to you I know so much more about my life than before! I'm sorry to say but I don't feel bad about what happened with my parents, for some reason I just don't feel it. And the only reason I fainted was because I saw Jacob! Although, I still don't know him…"

"Wait, wait, wait, how do you know about Jacob?!"

"I remembered his name! He was the man in my dream!" Her eyes widened in horror while Edward and Jasper looked confused.

"What dream?" Edward was the first to snap out of it.

"Well, see, the other day I had a dream about being at a park with this guy! I think I was mad or something but anyways, I was walking with him and suddenly I get a pain in my head, darkness, and then the hospital!" After I finished explaining, Edward and Jasper's faces mirrored Alice's. What is so wrong about that dream?

"The guy I told you about is Jacob! He's the guy I was walking with! Maybe I can talk to him and see if this is some sort of memory! That's why I really need to talk to him!" A crazed manic sensation filled me as I thought of talking to Jacob and finally putting pieces of what I have in my head into the full puzzle!

"No! I mean, um, no. You don't need to see Jacob because that never happened. Jake and you aren't on very good terms. Yea, you had a fight in 5th grade and ever since then you guys haven't really talked to each other. Right, Alice?" There's a sinking feeling in my gut that Edward is lying but he wouldn't lie to me nor would Alice.

"Um, okay…Back to the point, I'm staying here, Bella. My emotions are at a frenzied point right now until I know that you are okay and going to be fine. So until then, I am here to stay!"

"I'm fine! Why doesn't anybody believe me when I say that?! Jasper, I haven't really hung out with you but don't I look fine? I look normal, right?" The only people I've really spent my time with would be Alice and Edward, on occasion I would see everyone else but mostly it was just those two. Jasper appeared nervous to answer; both Edward and Alice's menacing glares must be getting to him.

"Uh, in all honesty, forgive me Alice and Edward; I have to say that you do look fine. You remembered me so your memory does seem to be getting better and I'm sure that the doctor wouldn't lie to us again of your condition. In my opinion, you look normal…" He trailed off as Alice got a wild look in her eyes.

"How could you say that?! Jasper, you're supposed to be on my side! And you're right, the doctor lied to us so who says he won't do it again just to 'spare our feelings'?! She is not completely fine or she would know—she would know everything. Meaning, her entire memory would be back!" Jasper put a calming hand on her shoulder and she visibly calmed down but I don't think the fight is up.

"Alice, how can I prove it to you? I'm fine and I will get my memory back, just stop, okay?! Right now, I feel more normal than ever before! I never thought that it would get better; it was as if I was living in darkness and now I found the light. Go hang with Jasper! Just let me spend some time with Edward, please?" We stared at each other hard, her suspiciously and me pleadingly. Why does she have to be this way?! I don't want to make her feel bad or anything but she is really making me angry right now. For once in what life I remember, I feel normal and almost happy but she's ruining this by reminding me of what I don't have.

"Okay, but I will come in and check on you soon!" Sensing my growing frustration, Jasper pulled Alice out of the room and down the hall. After that, I turned around to Edward who regarded me with caution and apology.

"Please don't be mad at her, she just cares for you a lot. We know that you're 'normal' right now but Bella you've had so many accidents in your life, we don't want to lose you. That's why we're so overprotective." He wrapped his arms around me and lifted me up so that I was sitting on the bed and he was standing in front of me.

"I'm not mad at her…that much. It's just that after Alice told me about my parents, I feel so knowledgeable about myself. My life doesn't feel like an empty hollow, it's filled with something. It may not be good but at least it's something, right?" Nodding and smiling Edward was about to say something but the doctor came back into the room.

"Sorry to interrupt you all, but I've done some basic checking up and you seem to be fine, Bella. I do still want to inspect your brain waves and such so yes you do need to spend the night. For now, I would really appreciate it if you could rest some more, you're probably not all that sleepy but please try. It's important for your brain to have some well maintained rest if you're to get all of your memory back." The doctor left the room again and Edward got a concerned gleam in his eye.

"He said that he wanted you to rest, so no more talking I want you to sleep."

"But Edward, what about you? You can't just stay here doing nothing!"

"Tell you what, I'm going down to the office and checking up on everything there while you sleep. When I come back, I'll bring lunch because I definitely know from experience that this hospital food is awful!" He grinned crookedly, kissed my forehead, and whispered 'sleep, Bella' before he left. I guess he really wants me to take rest and get better. But it still seems like he's hiding something from me; not just information but also some sort of emotion or something. I just don't get it.

The rest of the time at the hospital I slept except on the occasion when Alice would visit and when Edward came with lunch. All in all, it was a very boring, mundane day.

When morning arrived, I woke up to find Alice with a bag of clothes waiting eagerly. She's gotten so much more energetic and happy since last week. It's as if a light went on in her head and she's concentrating on 'the now' more than she is for the future. As if she wants to make the best of each and every moment.

"Please! I've already missed a week why can't I go now? You even said that I seemed pretty normal, it's not fair!" Currently, it's mid morning and I'm trying to convince Edward to let me go to work but he refuses saying that I'm still recovering.

"No, Bella. You're still not all better so you're not going. I care about your well being so the answer is no." Ugh, he's so darn stubborn! Annoying too, why didn't I notice this before?

"Edward! Come on, you're impossible! I want to go! I'm fine, please?! Come on!" By now I was gripping his arm tightly while he was standing in my living room; lucky for me, he decided to stop by today. That's most likely because I was pleading with him to let me go to work today last night but nonetheless now that he's here, he has to let me go!

"Bella, no! I already told you, the doctor said to take lots of rest and that's exactly what I'm going to make sure you do." Stupid green eyed boss! Why can't he just let me work? Unless…unless he found a replacement!

"Edward, you didn't…you didn't replace me, did you?" Tears slightly quelled in my eyes because I wasn't even given a chance.

"No! Of course I didn't replace you! It's just that I don't want you to get worse or anything, as the doctor said your brain is delicate and we shouldn't stress you too much and work is definitely stress." This time I gave him puppy dog eyes and pleaded again.

"Please? I won't ask for anything else in the entire world! Just please, I want to go! Please?" At first his face still appeared stubborn then conflicted and finally into a face of submission.

"Alright, but I'm not going to give you a lot to do so don't expect anything." Doesn't matter, I get to go to work! Squealing, I hugged him like crazy.

"Thank-you, thank-you, thank-you!" He chuckled and hugged me back.

Arriving at work—finally!—I took a moment to appreciate the outer beauty of the office before rushing inside as fast as I can in the outfit Alice made me wear. It was a tight gray pencil skirt, white blouse, and black heels. I'm not too good with walking around and stuff, very clumsy.

"Bella, slow down before you hurt yourself! At some point you're going to trip and fall then land back inside the hospital." On the outside it was obvious that Edward was joking but I could see the honest worry in his eyes. Rolling my eyes, I replied.

"I'm not going to trip and if I do, I know that you're here to catch me! Now let's go! I want to see the inside of the office!" He laughed and led me inside and upstairs through the elevator all the way to the 40th floor. Darn, that's high! There must be very few people working up here. Walking through the hallways, I got a glimpse of something in my head. It was me and Edward yelling at each other, me panting and out of breath, Edward smirking. Hmm, these must be things that happened before. I wonder what Edward and I were fighting about.

"Hey Eddie! Oh, _she's_ back." Who is this? Apparently she knows me and doesn't like me very much by the way she's glaring at me.

"Edward doesn't like to be called that, but anyways, who are you?" She looked at me with disbelief and flipped her platinum blonde hair over her shoulder.

"Excuse-me? You like don't know who I am?!" Edward stepped forward this time.

"Uh, Lauren, the rumors about Bella's accident are true, she has amnesia so please take a fresh start with her and become friends." He smiled at her and then turned to me, telling me that he has to make an important phone call before disappearing inside an office door behind the desk 'Lauren' was sitting at.

"Hi, sorry about the freak out, but my name is Lauren and I'm _Edward's_ girlfriend and secretary. He probably told you that he doesn't like to be called 'Eddie' because only I'm allowed to call him that." I never knew that Edward had a girlfriend and his secretary at that! Why has he been skipping work so much if he had a girlfriend here? No wonder her didn't want me to come today, probably wanted to spend some alone time with her. Now I just ruined that!

"Oh, he never told me that he had a girlfriend. Sorry for barging in and stuff, in case you don't know or something I'm Bella and I'm not quite sure what my job is here…" She was just about to reply before Edward called my name. Better go see what he wants so I waved goodbye to Lauren and headed off through the same door Edward took.

"Hey, you called?" He glanced up from his desk and smiled at me.

"Yea, you should probably get settled into your desk and stuff so I can give you your first assignment! Wait, what's wrong?" Wow, he's good! He must have seen the little bit of guilt hidden in my eyes.

"I want to apologize; I feel so bad right now." He wrapped his arm around my shoulder.

"Why? You don't need to apologize for anything."

"I'm sorry for barging in on you and your girlfriend. No wonder you didn't want me to come to work today! You've been spending way to much time with me that she's probably jealous!"

"Wait, what girlfriend?"

"What do you mean 'what girlfriend'? She's your secretary and right outside this door! How could you not notice her?" Lauren is wearing one of the most revealing outfits in the entire universe, she has platinum blonde hair, and is wearing way too much make-up, how could her own boyfriend not notice her?

"Bella, do you think—do you think Lauren is my girlfriend?" His voice held outright astonishment and disbelief.

"Yea? She told me that she was your girlfriend and she's the only person that calls you 'Eddie'…" He looked angry and regretful.

"You've got it all wrong, I don't have a girlfriend. Lauren lied, you see, she has this sort of obsessive crush on me and you weren't exactly friends with her. I was hoping that she wouldn't be that way now that you don't know her but I was sadly mistaken. I'm sorry; I should probably talk to her one of these days." Oh that's a great relief! Now I don't feel so bad about coming to work anymore.

Throughout the day Edward would give me little projects to do, sometimes editing short stories or organizing something but finally it came time to end the workday.

"Ready to go home?" Edward came up to me and lent a helping hand seeing as how I was sitting on the floor. And yes, he drove me to work with him. Nobody trusts me to drive myself yet even though I think I remember how to do it but none of my friends are willing to take the risk.

"Let's go." Once inside the car, I turned up the air conditioning and glanced at Edward through the corner of my eyes. He's such a great guy! I hope he finds his true love soon, he deserves it. I mean, look at him! Who wouldn't like him? He's funny, handsome, kind, gentle, sweet and…Wait! I don't really know anything about him! How could I be so selfish? All this time and I haven't asked him a single question about himself! I haven't even tried to get to know him.

"Edward? I faintly recall you saying that I knew your favorite color before I lost my memory so why don't you tell me now? Surprisingly after all the time we spent together, I haven't gotten the chance to know basic things about you! So let's do it now."

"Okay, what do you want to know about me first?" There was a sparkle in his emerald eyes that was never there before.

"Um, let's see…what's your full entire name? I know Edward Cullen but do you have any middle names?"

"That's an easy question, Bella, my full name is Edward Anthony Cullen." I smiled at him and bolted questions one after the other, who said we had to go slow?

"What's your favorite color? Favorite food? Favorite book? Favorite type of music? Do you play any instruments? What exactly is _your _occupation? Do like it? What was your childhood like?" Before I could fire some more off, Edward interrupted with answers to the ones I already asked.

"Whoa, whoa, slow down! Let's see if I get this in the right order. Brown, pizza, _Romeo and Juliet_, classical, piano, I am the chief executive editor of my father's publishing company, sometimes my work gets tiresome but I like it, my childhood was pretty good…" Whoa, information overload, maybe taking it slow is a better idea.

"What do you mean by 'pretty good'?" He looked uncomfortable now, I wonder what's wrong.

"C'mon, what happened, Edward? It can't possibly be as bad as mine, can it?"

"No, no, no, it's not that bad but it's not good either at least before Esme and Carlisle that is…"

**What happened in Edward's past?? Well you shall all find out next update! I hope you liked it! =]]**


	9. The Past Can Come Back

**Hey all!! Thank-you so much for the reviews!!! I know a lot of you want sweet moments from Edward and Bella, trust me they're coming! Some are in this chapter but please be patient while they work a new obstacle out of their way…But before you read, I would like to issue a warning that this chapter is INTENSE! So keep your emotions checked and possibly a box of tissues near you! Enjoy :)**

**Chapter 9: The Past Can Come Back**

**Bella POV**

"You're adopted?!" He smiled but not in a way that portrayed happiness, more in an 'I am sad to say but yes' sort of way. Before saying anything more, Edward parked in a nearby diner and led me inside into the nearest booth.

"What can I get ya?" A red haired diner girl came over and started eyeing Edward like a predatory watching its' prey. What else is new? Everywhere I go with Edward, come girl is always looking at him. Most of the time—I must admit— it's me, but nonetheless almost every girl in this universe is infatuated with Edward Anthony Cullen.

"Two special burgers with cokes, please." He ordered quickly and she walked away reluctantly. I feel kind of bad for her because I think Edward is in love with someone. I mean, why else is he so sweet? He's in love but I don't know with whom yet.

"Yes, I'm adopted. Carlisle and Esme are the second pair of parents to adopt me." My eyes widened with curiosity. Why is he being so secretive about all of this? What happened in his childhood?

"What happened, Edward? Come on, you can tell me, I promise not to judge and who am I kidding? I probably had a far worse childhood than you!" Again, he smiled in the sad sort of way and began his story.

"I'm sorry but this is hard for me to start, I'm not quite sure how to begin but here goes. My parents' names are Edward Senior Masen and Elizabeth Masen. I was born on June 20th in the middle of the night and there were, uh, slight, um, complications with my mother's pregnancy. She had to be put on drugs and, well, she got addicted. But that's not the end of it, my father was enraged at her addiction and he would take any means to get her to quit. Stalking her, denying her, conversing with her, reasoning with her, blackmailing her, and…hitting her." I must look like a frog by how huge my eyes are right now.

"Edward, I-I'm so sorry!" He's always comforted me when I need it so I should do the same for him. I moved over to his side of the booth while at the same time the waitress came back with the food and left it there without a word. This may seem weird but I sat on his lap and put my arms around his neck in a hug, attempting to comfort him. I think it worked because he visibly became less tense.

"That's not all, Bella." His eyes glistened with tears that didn't fall but held infinite sadness in them.

"You don't have to tell me, Edward. It's okay, I understand."

"No, I have to tell you. The only people who know are Carlisle and Esme, I've never told a single soul outside of that but I feel like I have to tell you."

"Alright, but just know that at any moment if you want to stop then it's okay." My arms tightened around him and his did the same around my waist.

"He hit her countless times and by now I was a three year old infant but I understood. I knew what was happening, I would see the belt, the blood, the tears, and hear the screams of plea and shouts of anger. Soon enough, hitting her didn't just become a way to try and stop her growing addiction; it became a sick kind of sport. My father turned into an abusive person and hurting my mother wasn't enough for him so he turned to me, too." I gasped and tears spilled from my eyes at what a three year old Edward must have been subjected to.

"The one true saving grace from all the abuse was my mother; she wouldn't let him hurt me. She would try to stop him every time she could and instead of me, she would be subjected to all of the abuse. Hitting her and on occasion me didn't become enough for him, he wanted more from her. He wanted her to submit to him. Yes, that's right my Bella, he raped her. Many, many times. But what could I do? I was only an infant and fighting a 140 pound man was not something I could have achieved." Luckily, he took a moment to pause, this is all so intense! What Edward has gone through in the past! It's just too much for one person to have to deal with on their own!

"Soon enough, I couldn't take it! Although I didn't know what he was doing to her at the time, I heard her screams of pain from under my bed. I heard my sick, twisted father's grunts and groans of pleasure. I heard everything."

"Stop! Stop, please stop! Edward, this is too much! I can't take it! Just stop!" I started hyperventilating while Edward calmed me down.

"I'm sorry, Bella, I shouldn't be telling you this. You're so pure and sweet, I shouldn't taint you with this kind of thing. Come, let me take you home." Nodding my head, unable to speak, I let Edward take me to his car, discarding the untouched food.

"Edward can we please not go to my apartment, I don't know what to say if Alice asks me about my state right now. Can we go to your apartment instead?"

"Of course." The drive to his apartment was spent in an eerie silence, none of us wanted to say anything.

Once inside, Edward let me change into a spare pair of my sweats that Alice left here for some reason because I really needed to get out of these clothes. He also changed into pajamas and we sat on the couch in silence, again.

What Edward went through in his infant years is just…indescribable. How could someone be tortured like that? Where is the justice in that? Edward is so sweet and gentlemanly; one would never think that he went through something like that! Especially by the way he acts! He appears to be the exact opposite of what his father was. I need to know more. No matter how tough this is for me, he has to tell me. I need to know and he needs to get this all out. Like he said before, only Carlisle and Esme know, keeping that sort of secret inside for so long is too much for one person to have to be burdened with.

"Tell me."

"What?" His eyes looked at me with an expression I can't quite describe. Too many emotions swirled around in his deep emerald pool of eyes.

"I said, tell me. Edward, I need to know and you need to get this out so tell me. I want to hear the rest of it." Before I was even done speaking, Edward was shaking his head 'no'.

"Bella, I'm not going to continue telling you something as horrible as my past. It's just not right and I don't think you need to know. I've already gone through therapy so a breakdown is not coming anytime soon."

"Edward, I need to know this. As you said before, I feel like I need you to tell me this. Just, please?" Sooner than I thought possible, Edward agreed silently to my request. Looks like he needs to get this out as much as I need to know. Taking a deep breath, I prepared myself for what was to come.

"Are you—are you sure?" Instead of responding, I just nodded my head.

"So as I was saying, I heard everything. One day, my anger got the best of me. My mother's screams were becoming too much for me and I was haunted by them wherever I was. That one day, I tried to stop my dad from hurting my mom. I stood up for her and myself only to be met with a broken glass bottle. Once again, I heard my mother screaming from the horror that my dad committed. For, you see, I was lying on the floor with my head bleeding. The sad part is, I didn't cry, I didn't feel anything, and I didn't pass out. When true harm came to me, my mother must have snapped out of something because she yelled at my dad. She stood up for us both. I'm not quite sure what happened after that but in the end I heard a terrible cry of pain." For the second time today, I found myself sitting on Edward's lap crying along with him.

"Your mother—your mother, she didn't—she didn't die, did she?" He didn't answer for a long time and the worst came to mind but before I got too carried away, I saw the tiniest movement of 'no' from his head.

"The cry of pain came from not my mother but from my father. She stabbed him, she killed him. For herself, for me, and for us. For us, my mother became a murderer. The thing that hurts me the most about that is the fact that she loved him! No matter what he subjected her to, she loved him! When he was at work, I could hear her talking to herself. She would do nothing but praise him! She killed the man she loved all for me. In truth, she never cared what he did to her, if he would hurt me that's when she would get angry with him. When the police arrived at the scene, she was to be put in jail and I in foster care except she tested positive for insanity. My mother was hospitalized in a mental institution somewhere in the south while in the meantime I was put in an orphanage. A couple weeks later, I was adopted by Esme and Carlisle. After Emmett and Jasper, she couldn't have anymore children but she wanted a third son so they adopted me." I wrapped my arms around him in a vice grip and he did the same with me.

We remained in that position for who knows how long, he yearned for the comfort and I was there for him. This is all so much, how could he have kept this to himself for so long? The kind of burden that he's carried for so long, I can't imagine anything like that. Edward's father, the thought of makes me so disgusted. What kind of father would do that to his wife that he supposedly loved and three year old son? I may not have gotten time to spend with my parents all too much but I know that they would have never done anything like that to me.

My entire childhood was hardly ever filled with my parents but when they were there, they always said they loved me. I was the precious jewel in their lives.

"Thank-you for listening, Bella. I know it's hard but thanks, I really needed to get that out." Edward broke the silence with his unnecessary thanks but there is one thing that is still bothering me. He had said before that Carlisle and Esme were his second adoptive parents, who were the first?

"Edward, you said that you were adopted twice. Who was the first?" He smiled a sick smile with his head in his hands.

"Edward Senior and Elizabeth Masen."

"But—

"In a way, Bella, I'm an illegitimate child. My mother got impregnated by some man that I don't know of and Edward Senior, being the gentleman," Edward said the word with cruel humor, "he was, offered to marry her. They fell in love throughout my mother's pregnancy and everything came apart after I was born. That's something I'll never forget, seeing as how I was reminded of that every time my father beat me. I don't really know what happened to my real father nor do I care. He left and that's all I know. He didn't love my mother, he simply used her for his pleasure and that was it."

"Edward, what you went through, I-I'm sorry. That must have been so hard, I can only imagine."

"I'm glad that you can only imagine! I don't want anyone to go through something like that, especially you!" At this, he had his hands gripping my shoulder as if I was the life raft that would save him from the memories. I wish I could, I really wish I could.

The doorbell ringing brought us out of the tense atmosphere. Quickly, both Edward and I wiped away our tears and made ourselves seem normal before he went to get the door. Heated whispers were heard and finally Edward came back into the living room with someone following him.

"Jacob?" My voice held doubt because I can't believe this, this Jacob would finally visit!

"Bella, you know me?! You recognize me?" His deep, throaty voice replied with shock.

"Yes, that's why she fainted before. You came." That wasn't nice. Edward appears to dislike Jacob a whole lot but why?

"Or maybe she fainted because of the information that _you_ let Alice tell her! When she just recovered nearly a week ago you go and decide to tell her all about her parents?! How stupid could you be?! Do you know how dangerous that was?! We're lucky she woke up at all!" It seems like Jacob hates Edward just as much.

"Edward!" A new person burst through the doorway, following behind was Carlisle and Esme. The woman who came in front of them was beautiful! She had bronze hair and green eyes, like Edward. My eyes froze on her in shock, like Edward meaning that she could only be one person. Is she his mother? Turning to look at him, my answer was there. But instead of the happiness or surprise I expected on his face, it was anger. Why would he be angry that his mentally instituted mother came back?

"What are you doing here?!" Esme gasped at Edward's rudeness while everyone else looked surprised.

"Edward, I'm your mommy! How dare you talk like that?!" His mother seemed normal but I think she thinks that Edward is still a child.

"How could you come back? Don't pretend like you're my mother because you're not! A mother would actually care for her child, not leave it alone to go get high! A mother wouldn't have married an abusive bastard!" His language shocked me and I can't make sense of the situation. What Edward told me and what he's saying now doesn't seem to fit. But his mother completely understood and became extremely outraged.

"Edward Anthony Masen don't you dare talk to me like that! Your father is a respectable man, how many times must I tell you that the cut is from a broken plate that I dropped?! Or that this bruise came from me slamming the door on myself? Now, go tidy up this place, your father will be back soon and I want everything perfect for him." He scoffed in response and instead of replying, turned to Carlisle.

"Why did you bring her here? She was living with a nurse far away from here, why is she back?!" Rage was clear on his face but Carlisle only radiated calm.

"Edward, she is your birth mother and very ill, please treat her nicely. Her nurse quit because your mother has been asking for you, well more of demanding it violently."

"Why should I care? So what if she's been asking for me? What would make you think that I would want to do anything about that?!"

"Edward! Carlisle and I did not raise you to be that way! Be the gentleman that we taught you to be and treat your elders with respect." By now, I was confused beyond reason and Jake was sitting on the sofa with a thoughtful expression.

"Baby, are you really going to be like this with mommy? You know daddy loves you! Why don't you go play with your dinosaurs in your room and I'll make your favorite dinner? Like I said before, daddy will be home soon, we don't want to upset him, do we?" Elizabeth used a voice one would use with a child; it's as if she's in the mindset that Edward is a little kid. As if her mind is in the past.

"No! Don't you get it by now?! I'm not a child anymore! Daddy dearest is dead and gone and he never cared! He never cared about you! He only used you for himself! You had money, you were pretty, and you were pregnant without a husband or a boyfriend! Can't you understand that by now?! Just stop acting like you care, okay?!" In response, Elizabeth's eyes watered and she fell on her knees crying.

"He does care! He does! Stop saying that! He's coming back from work soon so you better go wash up! Tanya might come back soon, too. So please be good. She's a lovely girl you know." The whole room held their breath at Elizabeth's words. She knew a girl named Tanya and that seemed to be a big deal, who is this girl?

"Lizzie! I can't believe you just left a note telling me that you were here and went off on your own! Edward is a big boy now; he can take care of himself. Unless, you want me to take care of him then I will do so happily!" I'm assuming this is Tanya, but a strawberry blonde haired girl strolled into Edward's apartment like she owned the place. Edward's eyes narrowed dangerously and his voice held calm but there was a scary undertone in it.

"What are you doing with my mother?" The girl responded with a blinding little smile and placed her arms around Edward. That got my nerves, why is she touching my Edward?! Wait, _my _Edward? Since when did that happen?! I don't like Edward…or do I?

"Oh, Eddie! You're so silly! I've been watching your mother for the past seven years! I should tell you, by the way, she hasn't taken her medicine in quite some time!" She giggled like a school girl with a crush. And she called Edward 'Eddie'! He doesn't like that name so nobody should call him that! Why don't people get that?!

But she also said that Elizabeth hasn't taken her medicine in a while. Which might mean that her condition has worsened instead of getting better! That's why she's under the illusion that Edward is a little kid!

"Get off of me! What do you mean that you've been with my mother for the past seven years?! How dare you even come near her after what your father did to her! After what your father did to me! I accepted you before because I knew that you didn't choose who your father was, but now this is too much! I told you never to come near her after that incident in high school!"

"Edward, grow up already! My father was just as cruel to me and my mother as he was to yours so what are you going on about?!" Okay, now I'm really confused. What does any of this have to do with this girl's dad?

"He never abused her did he? He never raped her did he?! He never hurt a single hair on your head did he?! What about me, Tanya?! Abusing and torturing my mother wasn't enough, he had to go and hurt me too! Not only that but he was having an affair! An affair that created you! And did you know that I never said anything bad to you about that because I actually felt sorry for you to have a father like that? I loved you as if you were actually my sister! I ignored your attempts to seduce me because I knew it was wrong and I would never love you! Do you hear me?! I will never love you! I love Bella and that will never change!" By now, Elizabeth and Esme were in tears, Carlisle and Jacob were in a shocked state, and I was just there. But when Edward's last sentence came out, I froze on the spot.

Edward loves me? Edward loves me. _Me_? That doesn't make any sense! He's my boss! How could he—how could he love me?! But do I love him? My heart fluttered in my chest at the thought of me loving Edward and Edward loving me. But that's not right! I'm missing something.

"Please?! The freak you're married to?! If that's the way you want it then, Edward, fine. You take care of your sick mother! Stop sending checks to the address, too. I'm not her nurse anymore." Tanya walked out. Wait, she said married. Married? She said I'm _married_ to Edward? Again, my heart fluttered in my chest at the thought but that, too, doesn't make any sense! I can't be married to Edward! My head faintly pounded in my brain but this is not the time to think of stuff like this!

I have to help Edward with his situation; I have to get to the bottom of this confusing puzzle!

"Edward, baby? I think your father's supposed to come home soon, will you please check for me? You know I'm getting older and older everyday! My bones hurt!" Edward's jaw quivered but he kept himself together, picked up his mom and left to his room. Faintly, we heard him murmuring some soothing words to her and putting her to sleep. He came back out, looking around the room and resting his gaze on me before sitting on the couch with his head in his hands.

"I'm sorry guys, but could we maybe talk to you tomorrow? Oh and Esme can you please inform Alice that I'm staying here tonight?" They, including Edward, looked shocked at my words but nodded and left quietly. In the meantime, I went over to Edward, wrenched his head out of his hands and placed myself on his lap.

"Edward? Are you okay? I didn't understand anything that just happened but something seems to have struck a nerve with you…" I trailed off as he held me close and cried. For I'm not sure how long, we remained in this position while he cried and cried and cried.

After a while, he calmed down a bit to apologize to me for I don't know what but I just continued holding him and soothing him.

"It's okay, calm down, I'm here and I won't ever leave. Ever." When I said this, he got more panicky and hysterical.

"Calm down, calm down! Edward, I promise you that no matter what I won't ever leave. You need me and I think—I think I need you too." The last part I whispered quietly but he heard it and looked up at me with some foreign feeling in his eyes.

"Do you—wait, you can't promise me that. I know you can't promise that."

"No you don't, Edward nothing in the world can possibly go wrong with you while I'm here. Nothing will happen and I have no reason to ever want to leave you."

"Bella you can't possibly promise me that, I know you can't."

"And how do you know that I can't?"

"Because—because you don't know the entire truth."

"Then tell me the entire truth." I didn't notice before but our faces were mere centimeters apart and when I said that, his response was to kiss me. And I let him.

**Whew! That chapter has taken so much out of me! I promise you all that this is not the end! There will be more to come! But sadly this chapter has drained a lot out of me so I might not update quickly, we'll see depending on the feedback I get! If it's good or bad, I don't know but I do hope you all liked the chapter! =]]**


	10. The Truth Of Things, Almost

**Hey all!! Thank you so so so much for all of the reviews!! I'm sorry I didn't update yesterday but it was my birthday so I wanted to relax! =] This chapter isn't as intense as the last one, but to tell you guys the truth, you don't know all of Edward's past yet…there is a little but of EPOV in here!! Enjoy :)**

**Chapter 10: The Truth of Things, Almost**

**Bella POV**

We kissed and kissed and continued kissing for I don't know how long. It wasn't the savage need sort of kiss but Edward kept it soft and sweet. Finally, we pulled away for breath, both of us panting and sharing goofy smiles.

"That was—that was amazing." I looked over at him for reply but his eyes were still closed and he had an 'I'm the luckiest guy in the world' smile. So cute.

"Yeah, amazing." Panting, out of breath, and with me still sitting on his lap, Edward gazed into my eyes with an in-depth appeal. His eyes were so deep with emotion, some unknown to me, and others I could clearly recognize, one of them was guilt. Why is he feeling guilty? Does he think that our awesomely amazing kiss is wrong because he's my boss?

"Edward, what's wrong?" He was about to reply but was interrupted because my body gave way and I yawned.

"It's late and you're tired, I should get you to bed. Come on, I'll show you to, uh, your room for tonight." Before I could even say anything, he pulled me up with him and started leading the way towards the room I'd be spending the night in. I was about to protest again but I yawned for the second time, I'm tired and I should sleep. Especially if I want to, uh, talk with Edward tomorrow.

Just as I entered the room, my clumsiness caught up with me and I tripped. But this time, I had Edward to catch me. Instead of setting me back on my feet, he picked me up and gently placed me on the bed while I blushed as red as a fire truck.

"Thank-you, but, uh where are you going to sleep? Your mom took your bed and now I took this one…"

"I'll sleep on the couch." Edward smiled and was just about to leave but I stopped him. Sleep on the couch? Not on my watch.

"Sleep on the couch?! I don't think so, Edward. Your back will hurt like crazy in the morning if you sleep on the couch. This bed is, uh, very big for one person, so, uh, we can share it." In response, he chuckled a little and once again had that foreign emotion in his eyes.

"Bella, I can see how uncomfortable you are with that thought, honestly it's okay. I've had to sleep on the couch before, it was before your, um, accident. I've slept there for nights at a time, so I'm pretty used to it by now.

"Edward Cullen, you are not going to sleep on the couch one more night if I have a say in it! Now get in this bed this instant!" I don't know why but I can't bear the thought of him sleeping on the couch or him not being anywhere near me.

"Alright, alright, alright. No need to yell, Bella." He pretended to salute me like a soldier and got in the right side of the bed while I took the left side.

Once we were both settled, the awkwardness of this all came upon me unawares. I'm in bed with my boss. Wait, saying it like that sounds weird. I'm sleeping in the same bed that my boss is right after I made-out with him. Yup, that just about sums up everything.

"Bella? Are you sure this isn't weird for you? You seem kind of tense…" Rolling over, I turned my body to face his only to find that he was already looking at me.

"I'm fine, I'm fine, it's just that everything we did is finally dawning on me. I mean, you're my boss! This is kind of weird….but nice." When I said that this was weird, his face fell a little but as soon as I said it was nice, his face lit up with…hope? Ugh, he is so confusing! First, he feels guilty about making out and now he likes it?

"Well, Bella technically I'm your hus—I mean, I'm your best friend before I'm your boss. So, does that make it feel any better? You must think this is weird and, don't deny it from me, but I know you feel uncomfortable sharing a bed with me. Honestly, I can go to the couch."

"No!" I grabbed his hand and scooted over closing the distance between us so that I was in his arms. It felt really good to be there. Edward's arms felt like a safe harbor to me, all of those things from his past and my past can't reach me here. I just hope he feels the same way.

"Edward, please stay with me. I need you to stay." I didn't even bother for his answer and made myself comfortable enough to sleep. Just before unconsciousness took over my body, I heard him whispering.

"Good night, my lo—my Bella." In my half-sleep state, I smiled. The use of possession felt normal, it felt good. As if I was his and he was mine. I like that, I really like that.

I spent the night in Edward's arms and when I woke up; it was to see his emerald eyes gazing down at me with happiness and a bit of concern.

"How long have you been watching me?" At this, he smiled and shrugged.

"A while. You know Bella; you talk in your sleep. I've heard it before but did you know that?" I blushed madly, so he must have heard what I think of him. But wait, what do I think of him? I know I feel strongly for him but I always thought that was friendship or something. Now after last night, am I feeling something else for him? I need to talk to Alice about this, maybe she'll know.

"No, what did I say?" Slight concern and sadness filled his eyes.

"Just little tid bits about what happened last night. Look Bella, I'm sorry for telling you and I'm sorry for you to go through all that but you have to believe me. Don't listen to a word Tanya says because she's a liar." I don't understand anything he's saying! What does he mean by 'don't listen to anything Tanya says'. What did she say that concerned me?

"Edward, I don't quite follow. What do you mean?"

"Nothing, um, nothing. Come on, I'll go make breakfast. My mom might wake up soon and I want to cook something nice for her. It's been forever since I've last seen her, so, uh, yeah. I've already brushed my teeth and stuff so the bathroom is yours. Oh and Alice dropped off some stuff you might need earlier." He hastily got up and left the room. Okay, I'm guessing we're going to pretend that _we_ didn't happen last night.

I got up and did the necessary morning routines before heading inside the kitchen. Luckily Alice did drop off some stuff otherwise I would have to had brushed my teeth with my finger and I'd still be wearing sweats. But what she did bring for me isn't much better; it's simply a really long t-shirt with skinny jeans. I don't even know whose t-shirt it is but I know it definitely isn't mine.

When I got into the kitchen, Edward was cooking. _He_ was cooking! I didn't know he could cook! That's so, I don't know how to describe it but it's pretty cool that he can cook. I cleared my throat so he would notice me, he turned around and once he spotted me, his emerald eyes grew darker with desire…And to my sudden surprise, he kissed me! Guess we're not forgetting last night…

He pushed me back onto the fridge and we continued kissing until we heard someone's footsteps coming this way.

"Edward?! Baby, honey, where are you?! How many times does mommy have to ask you to sleep in the same bed as her so daddy can have one to himself?! He likes to keep to himself! Good thing he already left to work, young man! Since I didn't wake up early enough, he might get a bit angry sweetie, but remember he loves you. Now, where did you go off to?" Elizabeth finally found her way into the kitchen and saw Edward standing next to me.

"Darling here you are!" She went up to him and kissed me lightly on the cheek, having to go up on her toes to do so.

"Mom, um, good morning. Dad isn't here and he won't come back." I could hear the undertone of anger in Edward's voice but why is he so angry? I feel like he's hiding a lot of things from me. Things that I should know.

"Edward! Don't say things like that, you know it makes me angry. Now, who is this lovely young lady?" If she still thinks Edward is a toddler, how old does she think I am? Edward wrapped his arm around my waist and introduced me to this mother.

"Mom, uh, this is Bella. Bella, this is my mom." I smiled at Elizabeth who regarded me with curiosity. She kept glancing from my face to Edward's arms around me to Edward's face. What is she thinking?"

"Bella." Elizabeth came up to me wagging her finger at me, Edward's arms tightened around me.

"Now, Bella, you take care of my Edward. He's very special and looks like he's special to you. And Edward, baby, you watch this young lady and take care of her properly. Baby, you've found a gem among the rocks!" She smiled at us and pulled us in for a hug. Edward smiled like he was one of the happiest men in the world and I'm just confused. What does she mean?

"Alright, I'm going to go freshen myself up a bit then I'll be back. Looks like you've already cooked breakfast, Edward." She smiled lightly at him and kissed him on the cheek before leaving the room.

"Edward? What does she mean?" Panic flashed across his eyes quickly before settling into calm.

"Nothing, uh, she means well that's all." 'You've found a gem in the rocks!' 'Take care of him', that does not sound like nothing. If I didn't know better, then I would think that she thinks Edward and I are together. Wait, that's exactly what she thinks! But are we—are we together? We've already done things that couples do so does that mean that we're a couple ourselves? Do I even feel that way for Edward?

"Bella, I've got your food right here. Eat up! I don't want you to go hungry on this beautiful—and I mean beautiful— Friday morning." At the word 'beautiful' he looked at me and smiled. But his use of words, I recognize them from somewhere; I'm getting that déjà vu feeling. I don't know when or where but I've heard those words before.

My head pounded in my brain and random words flitted through. _Marriage. Freak. Tanya. Jacob. Park. Hate. Club. Divorce. Contract. _What do all of those mean?

"Ed—

"Edward! Why is Bella standing around while you've got hot food on the table?! Come on, be the gentleman I taught you to be and escort her to her seat!" Edward followed her orders and led me to the seat but I don't care for reality right now. My mind is running those same words over and over again. They're significant and if placed right then I should be able to figure out everything. At least I hope I will.

**Edward POV**

Having my mother live here doesn't exactly comfort me. For most people, seeing and living with their mother after seven years is a Godsend. But for me, it's a nightmare. With her here, all of those old memories I've repressed for so long come back.

Bella being here doesn't make it much better. How can I survive this without my love to keep me from falling under? Sure, before she hated me but I know that if I were in this situation then, she would have kept her own feelings aside and comforted me.

When Tanya dropped by yesterday, I freaked out. How could she have been my mother's nurse?! How could she have not given my mother her medication?! High school sabotage just wasn't enough for her, she had to go and ruin seven years of my mother's life!

And that kiss with Bella. Well, more of those kisses with Bella. They were amazing, absolutely fantabulisticly amazing. It's been so long since I've been able to do that and, God, I feel like I'm home at last! It feels like my life is complete, like I'm the happiest man in the world! The best part about it is that not only did my mother actually approve of Bella this morning—that feels good because my mother's never approved of any friends that I had—but also because Bella wanted to kiss me! She wanted me to sleep in the same bed as her last night! She wanted me!

But then again, what she said in her sleep last night was equally horrifying. From her words I could tell that she was imagining my childhood. She was imagining the horrors of my past! I shouldn't have told her, that is something I both feel happy about and intensely regretful for. By telling her, I let her inside of my past and let her see my true self but then again, I tainted her pure soul. Because of her parents, her life has been hard enough but now with the knowledge of what I went through a long, long time ago she must feel burdened! I knew I shouldn't have told her! Then why did I? For my sick, selfish needs! I needed to tell someone, I needed to talk through it with her, not just any old someone. Because of that selfish reason she must feel horrible! Then I go and offer to tell her everything and I kiss her! How could I kiss her?!

Of course it felt amazing to do that but there I go again with my selfish needs! I took advantage of her and she probably still thinks that I'm her friend and would never do that to her. But I did, I took advantage of her feelings for my gain. She was feeling sympathy toward me and I took advantage of that! How could I?! After 'daddy dearest' didn't I promise myself I wouldn't do that?! Then this morning when she woke, I tried to pretend like nothing happened but when she came into the kitchen wearing my shirt, my primal instincts took over. It felt right to say _my_ Bella. I forcefully kissed her, yet she didn't say anything. Why didn't she say anything?

Is she starting to feel the same for me or was it sympathy again? I bet it was sympathy, how could she fall in love with someone like me? I have the most horrible past imaginable and I'm not special in any way. There are so many better people in this world for someone as pure and perfect as Bella. But just because I know that she can't love me doesn't mean I'll give up on her so that that retched Jacob Black could take her.

Ever since high school he's hated me because Tanya was infatuated with me. As if I could ever like her! She's claimed to love me but I've never felt anything other than 'family affection' for her. But knowing what she's done now, she doesn't even deserve that. Bella is the one I love and I will always love.

"Edward?! Darling, you've been staring off into space for a while now. Your food is getting cold so eat up!" My mother snapped me out of my thoughts and back to the present. We were sitting down and eating the breakfast I had prepared. Ironically enough, my mother was the one to teach me how to cook. Back in high school, she thought that I should know how to cook so that when the right girl came along, I would be able to take care of her and treat her like the queen she is. I already have that girl yet she doesn't know who she is and when she knew it, she didn't care.

"Sorry, I was just, uh, thinking." Before any of them could reply, I stuffed the food in my mouth and finished quickly. Carlisle and Esme should be here soon, I have to go to work so they promised to take care of mom for me until then. No sooner had I thought that, the doorbell rang.

"I'll get it." Quickly rushing to the door, I opened it only to see Jacob Black facing me on the other side.

"What are you doing here?! Twice you come here only for me to have something horrible happening, now going for a third time?" He sneered back at me but stayed nonetheless and whispered furiously in reply.

"None of that was my fault, in case you'd like a reminder. I'm here to talk to Bella; last time I came she wanted to talk to me so now I'm here." I rolled my eyes; he actually thinks I'm going to let him talk to her? Please, I'd rather be struck by lighting then let that happen.

"I don't care what she might have said, you are not talking to her lest we want another accident to befall upon her and I'm not letting that happen. In case _you'd_ like a reminder, she's in this situation because of _you_."

"Me?! She only ran away because you're treating her like some trophy object, a contract?! Are you serious?! Marrying her and keeping her through a contract? How low could you possibly get?"

"She chose to sign the contract! I did it because I love her! Do you love her? No! You want her because I have her!"

"She's my friend, Edward! Long before she was yours! I care about her and I want to protect her from the likes of you!"

"Protect?! You weren't protecting her at the park now were you?! When she's with me, she's protected 24/7 from any harm and right now that includes you!"

"I bet she cried every single night of your marriage! When she was with me, I would listen to her go on and on about how much she dislikes you! How much she wishes that you would agree to a divorce!"

"Well fine then but you weren't the one that she was kissing last night now were you?!" His eyes bulged out at this information but his face once again turned into pure rage. He's like some sort of animal, he can't keep control of his anger and that's his weakness.

"Took advantage of her while she was in no state, Edward! You obviously told her about your sob story past but, hmm, let me guess you didn't tell her all of it now did you? You only told her enough to gain her sympathy. Just like Edward Senior now aren't you?" By now, we were both yelling, Bella and my mom must have heard because not a second later I heard footsteps coming this way. If not for them coming, I think I would have been choking him by now. He has no right to talk to me that way.

"Jacob Black?! Is that you? You've grown into such a big boy! You have your father's eyes." That was the last straw!

"Get out of here, right now." My eyes narrowed and I lowered my voice to a dangerous low. He better get the message before I kill him.

"I'm sorry Elizabeth, but I have to go to work right now. Goodbye!"

"Goodbye!" My mom was leaning out of the doorway to say goodbye to that scoundrel! He even had the nerve to address her!

"Um, Elizabeth I think I see another car pulling up, would you mind going to say hello to them?" Bella was right, Carlisle and Esme pulled in as soon as Jacob left. Bless her soul, she knew that I was shaking with rage and wanted my mother out of here.

**Bella POV**

Lucky Carlisle and Esme pulled up as soon as Jacob left, whatever they talked about must have infuriated Edward a lot because he was visibly shaking with anger.

"Um, Elizabeth I think I see another car pulling up, would you mind going to say hello to them?" She obeyed and went to go greet them, thank god because Edward doesn't look to well right now. They were going to come back inside to say a quick hello but I told them now wasn't the time. I have to go see what's wrong with Edward. There's a lot that I'm missing, that I don't know.

"Edward? What's wrong? What did Jacob say?" I kept voice calm so as to not anger him anymore by demanding answers from him. He doesn't look like he wants to talk about anything but he needs to get it all out. What he told me last night wasn't all of it. I could tell he was withholding some information from me and I didn't mind then but I have to know now.

"Bella I don't want to talk about it right now." Just like last night, he put his head in his hands while sitting down on the sofa and I went up to him and sat myself on his lap.

"Edward you have to talk about it. You may not want to but obviously you haven't told me the entire truth of your past, now tell me what went down with you and Jacob? Did he want to meet me?"

"Stay away from him, Bella. He's bad news and not good for you." This angered me, he's not telling me everything and yet he wants to keep me away from someone I had a dream about? Jacob is important somehow and I'm going to figure out why.

"How do you know that? You hate him a lot so that must mean that you don't talk to him quite often, now I don't know why you hate him but I'm going to meet him one day. I had a dream about him and that can't just mean nothing!" His eyes darkened but not from desire from suppressed anger and he wrapped his arms around me tightly, not enough to hurt but as if he never wanted to let go.

"I know it Bella. I know Jacob far closer than you think! The dream you had about him should be called a nightmare! It may seem like a good dream but what happened at the end, Bella?! You woke up in a hospital! Jacob is not good! He's—he's vile! You are not going to see him and that's final!" Now anger flashed through me! He can't just tell me what to do!

"Edward I am not a child and I am not a sick patient in need of care, you cannot tell me what to do! You have no right! I am my own person and I just can't wait to be free of you! I never want to see you! You won't tell me anything! You won't tell me the truth when I ask and now you're acting as if you own me!"

Suddenly, everything rushed inside my head. I understand now. I understand everything. I know everything. I got up off Edward in disgust. The ring near my clothes suddenly makes sense. Everything makes sense.

**Whoa, didn't expect that now did you? For those of you that wanted to see Bella/Edward fluff and then them falling in love, I'm sorry it's not in this chapter! But don't worry there is a lot of fluff coming up in later chapters. Bella's ridiculousness won't last for long!! Anyways, I hope you liked the chapter—I had a lot of expectation after the last one so I hope that this could live up to it. =]]]**


	11. Liars

**Hi, everyone! Thank you all so much for the lovely reviews! To perfectly make clear last chapter: Bella got her memory back! Though she can't make total sense of everything, she knows what happened…This chapter is all about how Bella is so stupid, haha, you guys will understand soon enough…Enjoy :)**

**Chapter 11: Liars**

**Bella POV**

I regarded him with disgust. He didn't tell me anything and he's known this whole time! I'm—I'm married to him?!

"How could you?!" He better have a good answer for this, he's known this whole time. It's been two weeks since I woke up and he hasn't told me anything! Nothing! Nor did Alice or anybody else, how could they keep something so big from me?! And not letting me see Jacob, what a pathetic attempt to keep me to himself! He didn't reply but continued looking depressed and put his head in his hands again.

"Edward, I'm talking to you! How could you keep that from me?! I've been with you so many times, I kissed you, and I shared a bed with you! I can't believe this! You're awful and then trying to keep me away from Jacob! You're such a sad person! How could you do something like that?! I thought you said you loved me and if you did then you would have told me the truth! Not take advantage at my vulnerable time! And Alice and everyone else listening to you?! I just don't understand."

"Bella, it's not what you think; I wanted to tell you everything. From the beginning I've wanted to tell you everything so you could choose for yourself but the doctor and Alice said that too much information for you would be bad. I didn't want anything to happen to you and I was going to tell you yesterday but I—I chickened out."

"Chickened out?! Edward this is my life and you haven't told me! I can't bear the sight of you anymore, just leave me alone!" I started heading toward the door, I don't know where I'm going but anywhere has to be better than here.

"Bella wait! Where are you going? You don't have a car! You can't just leave, I need you, I—

"Don't you dare say it. You don't need me and you certainly don't love me! If you loved me then you would have told me no matter what anybody else said. If you loved me then you wouldn't have forcefully kept me with you when I loved another man!" He looked completely taken aback at my words, but it's the truth.

"What?" He's trying to act clueless now, oh please!

"Don't act clueless! You know perfectly well that I was in love with Jacob before the accident. You know perfectly well that he loved me back too. That's why you hate him so much! That's why you won't let me meet him because you're afraid that I'm going to fall in love with him again! You know what? That's exactly where I'm going to go; I'm going to go see Jacob!" Without even a backward glance, I left the apartment.

But on my way down to the lobby, my mind was having a war with itself. In all truth, I don't love Jacob. At least, right now I don't feel anything for him. But why else would I dream about him? I've never dreamed about Edward or I can't remember it yet I remember the dream about Jacob so clearly. We were strolling together in the park. I had to have loved him before, that can be the only explanation.

My heart says that I love Edward but my mind tells me different. Why would he lie to me like that? Why would he not tell me that we're married? Why do I love Jacob? I shouldn't love him, should I? But then why am I married to Edward if I loved Jacob? That doesn't make any sense, and the contract? Why did I agree to that? This is all so confusing…

"Bella? What happened?! Why are you crying?!" I didn't realize it before but tears were falling down my face and Alice was facing me. The sight of her angered me; Edward's not the only person that withheld information from me.

"Leave me alone, Alice." I walked past her and started down the path toward Jacob's shop when she came in front of me again, blocking my way.

"Something happened, tell me! Did you have a fight with Edward? Did Elizabeth say something mean to you? Did Tanya come back? What happened?!" Trying to get her to leave me alone, I had kept walking but she followed me like a golden retriever so I rounded on her.

"How long did you think I would remain clueless?" At this she looked shocked and confused, probably faking it.

"What are you talking about? I'm confused…"

"Oh, don't pretend like you have no idea what I'm talking about! Just leave me alone!"

"No, Bella! We have to talk about this; can you please explain to me what you're going on about?" By now we reached the main street and people were staring at us but I could care less. They have no idea what's going on so it doesn't matter.

"I don't _have to_ talk about anything with you. If you want to know so bad why don't you go ask your good pal Edward?!" I sneered his name in disgust and repressed anger.

"Wait, what? You're angry at Edward but why?"

"I'm not mad at just Edward, I'm mad at everybody! Why did you tell me?! I've been awake for two weeks now and yet you guys haven't told me anything of my life! Sure, you told me about my past but what about the little significant detail that I'm married to my boss?!"

"You found out." Wow, she didn't even have the courtesy to look guilty but instead she looked concerned. For who? Edward? Why does she even care about him so much?

"Yes, I found out! How could you guys not tell me?! I thought you were my friend, my sister, Alice! I thought you did what was best for me yet you sided with _him_ over me!"

"I sided with him but only for you, Bella! The doctor said that if we told you then you might fall into a coma and never wake up again! What else could I do?!" She looked desperate now but as if I could care. The moment she started lying to me, our sisterhood ended. The moment she betrayed me, our sisterhood could never be the same.

"Then he changed his mind and wanted to tell you everything but I couldn't let him! You were falling in love with him, Bella. I could see it and by telling you everything I knew that you would react this way. Just please keep an open mind while we explain, please let us try to explain ourselves!"

"No, why should I?!" She's lying to me, none of them ever planned to tell me anything. I may be falling in love with Edward but that's all because of their carefully constructed plans. If not for them then I'm sure I would have been in love with Jacob by now.

"Because I'm telling you the truth now! Don't act rashly and let your emotions get the better of you! Just please listen to what I have to say! Please?!" Should I listen to her or not? Even though I can't truly trust her, she could tell me stuff that fills the gaps between everything I know or at least everything I think I remember.

"Fine but not here, follow me." I led her into a coffee shop with hardly anyone inside and we got a table all the way in the back so we could have some privacy.

"Tell me everything, start from the beginning, and don't leave anything out." And she did, she told me everything. From the moment she first met me to how she got me a job to my impromptu marriage to the accident. By the end, we had spent over half the day in the coffee shop but I think she told me everything. But can I trust her? She didn't say anything about me loving Jacob but then again how do I know for sure that I loved Jacob?

"Bella? You haven't said anything, what are you thinking?"

"For real, Alice, why didn't you tell me? Who cares what the doctor said? Why did you tell me at least a little bit to try and jog my memory? I was clueless the entire time! You let me hug and spend time with someone I originally hated! Why?" She appeared slightly guilty now.

"I did that part for your benefit, Bella I know that you feel something for Edward. I can just tell. Yet before you wouldn't admit it, you would always go on and on about how much you hate him and what you don't like about him. But, Bella, you liked him too. I once heard you talking in your sleep when you slept over, you would never admit it consciously but you liked Edward. If you fell in love with him and then we told you maybe you could try to understand, Edward was dead set against this and I guess he turned out right…for once."

"I have to go." This is all fine and dandy but I have to take this in and I need to talk to the one person I still haven't seen. I need to talk to Jacob. Maybe he can explain to me about _us_. Alice either didn't know about it or she's lying to me again.

"Bella, where are you going? What about us? What about Edward?"

"What about Edward?! I don't care right now, Alice. I need some things explained to me by the one person who can clear everything you just said." Confusion and caution slipped onto her face.

"Who are you talking about?"

"Jacob. I need to go see Jacob." Just like Edward, anger crept up into her features.

"You can't see Jacob! Of all people, Bella!" And just like Edward, she thinks she can tell me what to do.

"You think you can tell me what to do? Alice, in case you haven't noticed I'm a grown person now! You can't tell me what to do; after all we've been through! Jacob is the only person that can clear things up for me. I gave you a chance to tell me the entire truth but once again you lied to me."

"What are you going on about now, Bella?!"

"I'm talking about the fact that I'm in love with Jacob Black! You didn't tell me that now did you?" Shock colored her features and then again back to anger.

"I don't know who told you that but you most certainly do not love Jacob Black, you never did and, if I have any say, you never will!" Rage shook my body, how dare she tell me that!

"Alice Brandon, you have no right to talk to me like that! Why else would I dream about him? Before the accident wasn't the only dream I had about him! I've been dreaming his face for so long, what other possible reason could it be?!"

"Maybe the fact that because of him you got put into the hospital! He was the last person you saw before you fell so of course you would see his face sub consciously!"

"For once, listen to me and leave me alone! I need to go talk to Jacob!"

Having no car was a disadvantage but walking the four blocks to Jacob's shop gave me the chance to think things over and calm myself down. Alice told me so much that the information is all exploding inside my head.

The only thing she told me about Jacob was that I thought of him as only a friend but he had a slight crush on me but that can't be true. If he was my true friend then he would have been at the hospital. Then again if he loved me he would have been at the hospital. Unless…unless he did come but Edward kicked him out? Technically as my legal husband, Edward could do that.

Alice also told me about why I got into the accident in the first place. Edward and I had a fight and I went to Jacob as a refuge. That doesn't make sense, if I had a fight with Edward; wouldn't I turn to my 'sister' first? Wouldn't I have gone to Alice immediately? But seeing as how she is all Team Edward, I could see why I would go to Jacob to talk.

**Edward POV**

She left. For real, this time. She won't come back, I know for sure this time. Ugh, I've been such an idiot! How could I let this happen? She's right; I should have told her parts of the truth from the beginning! I shouldn't have lied to her!

Because of that stupid mistake, she's gone forever! What do I do? Should I call Alice? Should I run after her? No, I can't do that. If Bella wants to leave then I have to let her, no matter how much it hurts me. Now is not the time to be selfish.

Completely forgetting about work, I spent the rest of the day curled up on the couch thinking about Bella. How she used to laugh, how she used to smile, how she used to fight with me, how she used to walk, how she used to glare at me. All of these are the 'used to', I'll never get a chance to experience them again because of how much of an idiot I am!

Bella has always deserved someone better than me and now that that fact is catching up to me, I can't bear it! If Bella is not with me then I can't live. I can't survive without her. She's my everything. And when she said that she was in love with Jacob, I think my heart stopped beating for a second. She can't love Jacob, but she's always defended him, always wanted to meet him. No, she would have told me before!

I know for a fact that Jacob is in love with her but is it—is it a reciprocal? Just the thought of that made my heart splutter in its steady beat. The beautiful Bella I know could never love that scoundrel! She could never but she doesn't know him for his true nature. She doesn't know who he truly is.

Suddenly there was a knock on the door and I muttered a quiet 'come in'. Seriously, if that was a burglar, I'd let him steal everything and be left with nothing. Metaphorically, I am left with nothing. No matter how much stuff I have, all in all, I have nothing if I don't have Bella here to share it with.

"Edward?" Oh great, the next best thing, Alice. I do not want to hear her berating me for being an idiot right now. She's been telling me to explain to Bella my true feeling for the past week and I didn't listen to her. I can't tell Bella what I feel for her without explaining everything. Without the assurance of a reaction. Before when I told Bella how much I love her, I always knew that she would get angry but I saw the speck of acceptance in her eyes.

"Now is not the time, Alice. Leave me alone." Surprisingly, she chuckled at my words.

"Funny, those are the exact words Bella just told me." Bella? She talked to Bella? At this thought, I immediately sat up and invited Alice to sit down across from me.

"What did she say? How is she? Where is she?"

"Calm down, Edward. We've been talking this whole day and I've explained everything to her. Do you know what she said? She said that I was a liar! She doesn't believe me and she hates me!" Alice, who was always so strong, started sobbing.

"It's okay, it's okay, she's just confused that's all. I think everything is too much for her because just as she left she said that she loved Jacob. She must be kidding, right Alice?" My desperate attempt to make myself believe she was kidding when she said that was futile because of the expression on Alice's face.

"She told you—she told you that she loves Jacob?"

"Yea but she must be kidding! She can't—she won't, Alice?" Doubt prickled inside my head. She may not love me and she may have left me but the one thing that will truly crush my soul will be if she is honestly in love with Jacob.

"That's what she told me, I think she's under a misunderstanding, Edward. I know that she likes you, at least I know that she used to."

"Used to? Why is everything used to these days?! Why can't everything just be normal?! Why did this happen?! It's not fair! If Bella is gone, I can't live. If Bella loves Jacob, then I can't exist at all."

"Edward, don't be so dramatic! Bella is not gone forever; she's just taking some time to think things through. The real Bella would never leave us."

"How are you so sure about that Alice?" Tears welled up and fell down her face.

"I'm not, Edward, I'm not."

**Bella POV**

"Bella! It's so nice to see you after so long! I'm sorry for everything! Please, forgive me! Wait, you don't know what I'm apologizing for do you? I bet Edward and Alice didn't tell you anything." He hit it right on target.

"That's exactly it! Jake, you have to help me! I remember everything but none of it makes sense to me and Alice explained everything to me too yet there's stuff that I don't understand…" He smiled a warm smile at me, pulled me into a soothing embrace, and whispered comforting words to me.

"Stop crying, please stop crying, Bella. Come on, we can talk inside." Jake led me into his mechanic shop and grabbed two chairs for us to sit on.

"Now, tell me what happened." He smiled encouragingly at me and I told him.

"After you left this morning, Edward was really angry but I don't know why and he never explained. I was trying to comfort him but he was still upset. Then he told me that I couldn't trust you and that I wasn't allowed to see you. How stupid is that?! He said something and my head rushed and I remembered. I remembered everything. What on earth makes him think that he can tell me what to do?! I gave him a piece of my mind because he's kept all of this from me! I have a right to know about my own life! Then as I was leaving, Alice found me and we talked and she told me everything. But she forgot one minor key, she lied to me again!" By now, Jake was leaning forward on his chair, intent on hearing every word I say.

"What did she forget to tell you?"

"She forgot to tell me that—that I loved you." Shock completely overtook his face and so many emotions flashed by in his eyes that I couldn't tell them apart.

"Bella, you know I love you for real right?" How could he ask me such a question?

"Of course! This is why Edward hated you so much! I loved you and you loved me and he was jealous! That's why he came up with that contract thing, I don't know what I was thinking when I agreed to that!"

"Bella, you—

"Yea, he was so happy when I agreed to it! And then after this whole fiasco, he never let me see you! In the past two weeks, I haven't seen you at all! All of them always told me to keep away from you! Even Alice!" Anger settled onto his face but I don't know why.

"They told you to keep away from me?! They have no right! Edward isn't the only one who's in love with you and wants the best for you!"

"I know! That's what I told them! Wait, so does that mean that Alice and Edward were lying when they said I didn't love you?" Conflict flickered in his eyes before finally settling on determination.

"Yes, you loved me and I sincerely loved you but Edward loved you too. That's why when you were drunk, he took advantage of you. He does that a lot with you, for example last night. He told me that you kissed him—

"I didn't kiss him! He kissed me and I thought that he—

"It's okay, my Bella, you don't have to explain it to me. I know Edward is as sly as a fox; of course he took advantage of you at any weak point. I understand." Jake smiled forgivingly and sympathetically at me and pecked me on the lips. For some reason, when he did that, my heart suddenly panged for Edward.

But it shouldn't! I don't love Edward, I love Jacob! This has been an exhausting day and I think I want to just take a stroll and figure things out, smooth things over in my head. I said goodbye to Jacob and just started walking in a random direction.

Now let me take this all in. I'm in love with Jacob who loves me back. That's easy as 1, 2, 3, A, B, C but the problem comes when Edward falls in love with me too. According to Jacob, Edward took advantage one night when I was drunk and persuaded me to marry him, which I did. Then when I woke up the next morning, he made up a contract that I should stay with him for a year and if I don't fall in love with him then he'll sign a divorce.

God knows why, but I agreed to said contract and we all lived life then on. Then one day, I get into a fight with Edward and seek refuge with Jacob but a baseball hit me in the head and because of all the concussions I've had in my life, I fell into a coma and woke up with amnesia.

When I woke up, both Alice and Edward thought it would be best if I didn't know what was happening and never explained anything to me. They also didn't let me see Jacob at all for whatever reason. Either they didn't want something bad to happen to me by seeing him or they thought I would run away with him. The latter seems to make more sense because Jacob himself told me that I loved him and he loved me. Yet why does it feel like something is wrong in this equation?

Just thinking the fact that I love Jacob, it feels different. If I said I love Edward, then it runs smoothly in my head. But what they each told me is different. Jacob told me bad things about Edward and Edward did the same with Jacob. And Alice told me nothing bad about anyone but only good things about Edward. This is all so confusing!

I kept walking without looking where I was going and finally realized where I was. I somehow brought myself to the park. Now there's one question I have to ask myself.

Am I on Team Jacob or Team Edward?

**Hahaha, this is a question we all ask ourselves at some point in our very short lives…As I said before, this chapter was all about Bella being stupid and trying to figure things out. Just to explain now before anybody asks: yes she remembers everything but she's so flooded with information that she can't exactly piece everything together right. Because of her dreaming about Jacob and talking to Jacob all the time before, she thinks that she's in love with him especially because she had hated Edward. I hope that explains it and I hope you all liked the chapter!! =]]]]**


	12. What I Used To Hate About You

**I'm so very sorry for the long wait!!! I just haven't had the time to write and I had writer's block, but here is the next chapter!! I hope this is actually worth the long wait!! Enjoy :)**

**Chapter 12: What I Used To Hate About You**

**Bella POV**

This is now the crucial question. Team Jacob or Team Edward? They're both such great guys and I love them both. I used to love Jacob but now I feel as though I'm in love with Edward.

Ignoring all of the curious stares I received because of my disarrayed state, I went and sat on the closest park bench. As soon as I sat down, memories flooded inside my head. It's as if I was watching my life pass by as an outsider. Finally it ended with me waking up in the hospital. But none of it makes sense with what Jacob has told me. All of the memories inside my head make sense with Alice's words yet wasn't I supposed to be in love with Jacob? I have no memories of that. But then again, why would Jacob lie to me?

So, now it's time for me to choose. Obviously I can't be with both so I have to choose between my legal husband who loves me and the man I'm supposed to love who loves me. On one hand there is Edward who loves me a lot, is very sweet, caring, gorgeous, loving, protective, but he's also a liar and I'm supposed to hate him. On the other hand there is Jacob who is fairly handsome, nice, caring, is most definitely not a liar, and I'm supposed to love him. Okay, by that score I would say the favor is more on Jacob. Let me think this through, once more and thoroughly; I don't want to miss any detail.

Jacob is mysterious, protective, and caring. I haven't gotten the chance to talk to him much but from my memories, I know that he is a good guy and he's never given me a reason to think of him as the bad guy. As far as I'm concerned, he's never lied to me either. But being with Jacob doesn't feel right for some reason, when I was with him before, my heart had panged for Edward. Being with Jacob makes me want Edward that much more yet that doesn't make any sense. I'm supposed to love that tall, russet skin colored man.

Jake also has this wild nature about him, I feel so exhilarated and desire adventure when I'm around him. He's a sort of 'bad boy' and that's a refreshing change for me. I've known Jacob for a very long time so he's obviously the safe choice but is that really what I want now?

Edward, opposite to Jacob's dangerous vibe, is very sweet and very loving; he honestly does care for me but may not have the best ways of showing it. Then again I am extremely upset with him for not telling me the truth from the beginning but if he was in that position, wouldn't I do the same? If he had amnesia and the doctor told me not to tell anything to him, wouldn't I have listened? My anger towards him is irrational but it is still there.

Sure, he married me at a very inconvenient time but we were _both _drunk, not just me. I can't necessarily say that he took advantage because he asked and I said yes. But when I asked for a divorce, he refused and came up with the contract. Once again, I agreed to it but if I loved Jacob, why would I agree to such a contract? If I always thought Jacob was the one for me, why wouldn't I keep insisting on a divorce? Legally, he can't refuse a divorce if I keep asking for one so what happened? Could it be that I was slowly falling in love with him before?

Right now, I don't feel anything for Jacob. I mean I like him as a friend, but thinking of him as a boyfriend makes me miss Edward that much more. Shouldn't I feel the same way for him? Is it possible he's lying? But why on earth would Jacob lie to me?

Suddenly, I heard my name being called by two very different voices. One was very rough, husky, and deep while the other sounded like smooth velvet. Along with the voices came two figures running to where I was on two different paths.

To my right was the velvet voice accompanied with a bronze haired, green eyed man. To my left, the husky voice accompanied with a silky black haired, black eyed man. It's as if the fates expect me to choose right now, choose one and the other is heartbroken.

Taking a deep breath to calm myself, I stood up and walked towards Edward…

**Edward POV**

"She can't, Alice, she can't! How can she possible think that she loves Jacob Black of all people?! I bet he had something to do with it. That mongrel, when I find him I'm going to kill him, rip him to—

"Edward! Stop pacing back and forth punching the air, it's not helping! We just have to think this through, like I said she can't leave. The old Bella would never just leave us like that and seeing how she still has some of the old Bella in her, she won't leave for good this time. Now, I remember she told me that she was going to Jacob because she had to consult with him. Knowing how much he hates you, he is definitely going to lie to her and say that she doesn't love you or anything at all." My eyes widened, she knew. I can tell, she knew it.

"Wait, you know don't you?" My heart pounded in my chest as I awaited her answer. She knew. She knew. She knew! Once again, tears welled up in her eyes as she nodded her head solemnly.

In response I sighed and sat down on the sofa with my head in my heads; I seem to be doing that a lot lately.

"Who told you?"

"Carlisle and Esme, last night. They told us about your mom and…everything. About Tanya, about your dad, about your mom, just…everything. I'm so sorry, Edward." Sobs racked her body while anger overtook mine. I don't want sympathy! I don't want people to say they're sorry! What on earth would that do? Would that erase all the pain, hurt, betrayal? No, it won't do anything. But nonetheless I had to comfort my sister-in-law.

"It's okay, Alice, you don't have to be sorry. What's done is done and we can only deal with the now. The now being my wife left me for a scoundrel. Life is so unfair!" I talked with cruel humor in my voice.

"She'll come back, you just have to believe." Again, laughter filled with cruel humor escaped my lips.

"Believe? Believe in what?! For me, if there was something to believe in, I would have been the one in the accident with amnesia! I don't want to know my past! I don't want to remember it; I don't want to live it! Look, uh, I'm sorry for blowing up it's just I'm so angry. Why did she have to leave me?! Why?! She's the only thing that is actually worth living for! As corny as this seems, she's the guiding light to my heart, the one that keeps me from doing something stupid. She can feel whatever for me, just as long as she's here and let's me love her and treat her like the queen she should be! But I can't even have that! Jacob freaking Black of all people had to go and snatch her up!"

"What are we supposed to do, Edward?! We can't just go there and attempt to ruin her life anymore than she thinks we have! We have meddled enough and we just have to wait the outcome. The light always beats the dark, the sun always rises, she _will _come back to you." Alice had so much fervor in her voice that I almost believed what she said. That is, until reality settled back into my heart. She hates me and will believe anything that Jacob tells her.

"You know what? I'm not going to just sit around and wait for him to ruin my life any further. Bella does not love Jacob and I'm not going to stand here and let him make her believe she does! I'm going to do something I should have done a long time ago; I'm going to set things straight; starting with Jacob." With that, I picked up my jacket and left before Alice could say anything else.

The drive to Jacob's shop, I spent pondering what kind of horrors I can put him through and ignoring the constant calls I received from my other family members. No doubt, Carlisle and Esme told everyone and now Alice told them where I was going.

When I got to a red light, my phone beeped again and I just picked it up to answer whosever call that was.

"Hello?"

"Edward, what the fuck are you doing?!" Great, it's Rosalie. She's never been too nice and too mean. But then again, she's very blunt about things and always speaks her mind.

"Rosalie, I'm going to Jacob's house to settle this once and for all and tell Bella the entire truth." I kept calm and relaxed; that's the best strategy when talking to Rosalie but I still heard her scoff of annoyance through my phone.

"Oh yeah, that's the smart thing to do! The poor girl just got her memory back and now you're going to burden her with all of your crap! I'm sorry, Edward that you had a bad past but there's nothing to do about it now so we all have to move on. If Bella thinks she loves Jacob then she thinks she does, let her figure this all out." Anger bubbled up inside, she was right but yet she was wrong. She doesn't understand how much this woman means to me!

"Rosalie you may be right but you don't understand how much Bella means to me! If I loose her, I don't know what I will do. Look, I may put up a front about being confident and all that but that is exactly what it is! A façade, in all honesty I am a bloody coward! I can't let her go no matter what."

"Even if it's for her own benefit? Even if Jacob is better for her than you are?" She sounded nice and calm but I couldn't believe her words!

"Rosalie do you know what you're saying?! Are you honestly telling me that Jacob is better than me?!"

"Edward you can't choose your parentage! You of all people should know and understand that!"

"I can't talk to you; just leave me the heck alone!" With that, I snapped my phone shut and turned it off so no one else could call me. They don't understand!

Bella is everything to me and as possessive as this sounds, she is mine! I can't live; I can't survive if she goes with anyone else especially if it's Jacob.

Finally, I saw his mechanic shop. Time to get and deliver some answers. I went up to his door and knocked, well more of _banged_, on it until he opened.

"Where is Bella?" At first his eyes widened in shock and then his face settled into his ever present sneer.

"You know you were right, she kisses like an angel." He didn't. No, Bella would never let that happen! He didn't taint her, did he? I'm going to murder him!

"Where is she?!"

"Obviously, anywhere that you aren't."

"Jacob I swear if you don't tell me where—

"Alright, alright! Calm down, Mr. Anger Management! She took a walk to clear her head; you missed her by about five minutes." A walk to clear her head, which could only mean one place. I guess he realized this the same time I did, he took longer, just for the record. We both whispered 'the park' at the same time because that's the only place Bella would go to clear her head.

All of a sudden, it turned into a race. Jacob and I discarded everything and both sprinted towards the park, who could get to Bella first was the name of the game. It's always been that way with us. Who was better? Our universal question.

We raced and ran as fast as we could but were both tied. When we reached the park, I took the left path while he took the right. And then I saw her, sitting on a park bench looking conflicted. If I had my way, there won't ever be another care in the world for her. My days of immaturity are now over; I will treat her the way that I feel for her. I won't give her useless files to do, her job from now on is to sit there and look beautiful. Which she does anyway so her job is done.

"Bella! Bella! Bella!" Both Jacob and I shouted her name to try and get her attention first, who would she pick? As if snapping out of a trance, she jerked her head up and noticed us running towards. Again, conflict flickered on her face and in her eyes.

I came to a stop and noticed Jacob did too. This is the moment of truth, who will she choose? Then she started moving, at first it looked like she was going towards Jacob and my heart was ripping into a million pieces but she started walking towards _me_. The walk soon turned into a run and she yelled my name and jumped into my arms. I'm the happiest man alive right now.

"Edward! I'm sorry, I'm so sorry! But I choose you!" She cried as I spun her around in my arms. She chose me! Bella chose me!

"Bella! Don't you remember? He lied to you, you love me!" Bella landed lithely on the ground with my arms still around her waist.

"I'm sorry, Jacob. I may have loved you before," My arms tightened around her at her words but she turned back to me and smiled reassuringly, "but I don't anymore. I don't love you now and I don't think that's fair for you or me if I stay with you." His face distorted into a mix of anger and pain but it didn't matter to me, Bella is here to stay. With me.

"No! You can't be with him! He's a liar and a cheat! Just like his mother!" That was going too far, nobody can insult my mother, especially Jacob Black.

"Shut up! Don't you dare say anything about my mom!" I pushed Bella behind me and faced Jacob head on.

"Why? Can't handle the truth, _Cullen_? Can't handle the fact that your mother was a no good prostitute who turned into druggie?! Can't handle the fact that she landed herself in the loony bin?" His words cut me like a knife. Jacob Black cannot talk to me of all people like that!

"My mother was none of those things, your father on the other hand…" I trailed leaving it to open air; I have Bella with me so I'm not going to let his words get to me.

"Edward? What are you guys talking about?" Bella, the innocent angel she is, looked at me curiously. Rosalie's words hit me, she's right. How can I tell my beautiful angel the truth? How can I tell her who I'm actually related to? Jacob sneered at me again and regarded me with distaste.

"You didn't tell her? I'm shocked! Little Eddie can't tell Bella the truth? Trying to protect her from what you really are? Well, why don't I tell her?" I took a deep, calming breath; it's needed when I'm dealing with this mongrel. No use exploding at him in public, that will just create a scene.

"Jacob, you should treat your elders with respect. I'm older than you so start showing me some respect, _junior_." His body shook with what I assume is repressed anger, that made me smirk. Junior can't handle himself too well.

"The day I treat you with respect is when angels come down from heaven and serenade me! You're only older than me by two years!"

"Oh so that's how long it took your dad to move on! Boy, your dad travels fast. Is he with a whore now? He's no better than one so what does it matter?" Grabbing Bella's hand, I started leading her away but Jacob interrupted once again.

"Shut up! My dad is a respectable man! Besides, look who's talking? He's your dad too!" He said too much. I heard Bella's shocking gasp so pulled her hand harder and led her away from him.

**Bella POV**

Edward started leading me away but Jacob's words were still ringing in my ear. They didn't make any sense. _He's your dad too! _As in, Jacob's dad is Edward's dad? But that's impossible!

"Bella?" His melodic voice brought me back from my thoughts and I turned to see his distressed face.

"Edward—

"We'll talk about everything later but my car is still in Jacob's shop, do you want to stay here while I go get it or do you want to come with me?" Preferably, I'd like to stay here but it's starting to get dark and I don't want Jacob to find me because that is one confrontation I do not want to face right now. But then again, do I really want to walk another four blocks back to his car?

"Um, I'll go with you." I'd rather not be standing here at the park alone just waiting for Jacob to come look for me, that is if he will do that at all but I'd rather not take the chance.

The walk to his car was in silence, I left him to his thoughts and he left me to mine, although he did insist on holding my hand.

Now, uh, the big question is, why did I choose Edward? In my honest opinion, he's the better guy, at least for me. Again, he may not have the right way of showing his love but it's there. He loves me a lot and I don't think he can survive without me. Wait, that sounds superficial but it's true. He cannot go one day without doing something that shows his love for me, even when I couldn't remember anything at all, each day he would treat me as if I am a queen.

Jacob, on the other hand, from what I could remember is my friend. I don't recall feeling anything different for him but he says I loved him. And if I did then that's that but I don't love him anymore. Edward may have lied to me but it was for my own good and I can understand that now. Whatever he does is always whatever is good for me, he never thinks about himself.

Jake hasn't showed his love for me. He treats me like a friend and I guess your life companion is your best friend but Jacob is only a friend to me. I hate to admit it but Edward is my best friend.

"Bella? Get in." I realized my setting and saw Edward holding the passenger seat open for me, always the gentleman.

"Sorry." Blushing I got inside while Edward gave me his crooked smile. Wow, I haven't seen that for such a long time, even though it's only been a day I missed that smile. I've never seen him give anyone else that smile so in a way, it's my smile. Reserved only for me.

"So, uh, how are you feeling?" Edward's sad attempt to make conversation but when I looked at his face, I saw genuine concern in his eyes. What goes on in that man's head?

"I'm fine, look, Edward, I'm sorry for yelling at you before and for running away and—

"Don't apologize; you have nothing to apologize for. Let's just move on, okay?" I smiled at him and agreed.

Thanks to his super fast driving, we were home in just minutes. When we got inside, I saw that there were 50 missed calls and 20 voicemails left on his phone. I wonder who called so many times.

"Do you want to go change before we talk?" Nodding my head eagerly, I went into my room, took a shower, and threw on a pair of old sweats and a t-shirt. Alice would kill me if she saw this, it's not designer.

"Edward? Are you here?" Walking into the kitchen, I spotted him heating food up, that's when I realized that I haven't eaten anything all day! Man, I'm hungry!

"Thought you might be hungry." He smiled my smile and I noticed that he, too, was in sweats and a white t-shirt. We matched. The pasta finished heating and he scooped it onto two plates. We sat down in the kitchen, me next to the counter top and him on the other side, and started eating in silence. How exactly do you start the type of conversation I want to start? I mean I can't just outright demand to know whether what Jacob said is true or not. It hardly seems likely, Jacob's dad being Edward's dad? That must be impossible! It doesn't make any sense.

Before I knew it, we finished eating and went to sit down in the living room, still in silence.

"Edward, this may seem forward but I just can't take it anymore, is it true? What Jacob said, is it true?" Pain, suffering, and sadness leaked through his eyes as he nodded yes. The impossible just became possible. I don't know what to say, wow.

"But, how?"

"I'm sorry Bella but what Jacob said at the park is true. I haven't been completely honest to you about my past." He paused, as if what he was going to say was painful to him so I squeezed his hand in reassurance.

"William, otherwise known as Billy, Black is my father. He and my mother had, um, a fling that produced me. My mother was rich, she was well known, and she was extremely beautiful. She loved him but he only used her. After that one fling, he left her and never showed up again. That is when my mother met Edward Senior Masen, as you can guess I was named after him. Anyways, you know what happened after that but, I'm not surprised at all by this, he was having an affair. An affair that produced Tanya." My eyes widened, Tanya is related in this?! She's Edward Senior's daughter?!

"Yes, Tanya is Edward Senior's daughter. After he, uh, passed away and my mother was put into a hospital, I found out. I saw my own records in the orphanage and after a while Carlisle and Esme adopted me. My mother was released from the hospital when I was a senior in high school and she came back for me. Although she still required medications, she was otherwise almost normal. The only problem was she kept reminiscing about Edward Senior and that bothered me, I couldn't stand remembering. Because of that, I was always angry at my mother though I do love her a lot, I was angry at her for reminding me. For making me relive those horrors every night in a dream." He paused again and took a shaky breath, what can I do to make him not so upset?

In an attempt to calm him down, I scooted closer to him and put my arms around him in comfort. He smiled appreciatively and picked me up, placing me on his lap so that he could use my shoulder as a head rest.

"Tanya was still in the picture because I was living in the same town as before and she got a little obsessed with me. She liked me a lot but I only liked her as a sister, I never blamed her for what her father did. It's not her fault so I always treated her cordially. Jacob was also there and he liked Tanya for real but she would never give him the time of day. He got jealous of me and told me about his father. What his father did to my mother and ever since then we never got along. At the same time, Tanya was angry that I wouldn't give her a second glance so she took matters into her own hands and risked my mother's life. You see, we took turns watching over my mother, mostly it was me but sometimes I would need her to look after while I was at a club or something. One such day, she made sure my mother didn't get any of her medications. That made my mother's life turn very dangerous. With the loss of the sedatives, my mother went mental again.

"She had to be hospitalized for a year again and then a nurse accompanied her home. What I didn't know until about a day ago was that Tanya became her nurse and Jacob is still in our lives. As your friend and my enemy." He ended his story with tears threatening to leak out while mine were flowing freely.

He's had such a bad life yet he's turned into such a gentleman! No matter the horrors of his past, he puts it aside and acts normal! So sweet, caring, and loving!

"Edward, I don't know what to say." He smiled sadly at me and used his thumbs to wipe away my tears.

"You don't have to say anything, love, just please don't cry. Let's forget about my past and focus on the now and the future. I assume you're going to be my permanent wife from now on?" Edward looked at me suggestively and I had to laugh. He can actually make a joke after telling me all of this.

"Of course I'll be your wife! Who wouldn't want to be?" I giggled while his face looked priceless! I don't think he ever expected those words from my lips.

"You know, Isabella Swan Cullen," He beamed with delight at my name and I have to admit that I did too, "you are the most wonderful creature I have ever met in the entire world. I love you." Blushing at his words, I replied back.

"You know Edward Anthony Cullen, you may have had a horrible past but you have turned out into the most sweet and caring and loving person I know." I paused smiling mischievously while he looked at me anxiously.

"I love you, too." His eyes burst with excitement, happiness, and undeniable love. Not being able to take it anymore, I crashed my lips into his, falling into bliss while doing so.

**I know, very surprising twist! In my opinion, this doesn't quite feel like an ending and I don't really want to say goodbye either but if you guys feel like this ends the entire story then please tell me! I'm not quite sure if I should continue but I do have another twist coming up if I continue so…please tell me what I should do! Thanks for reading, I really hoped you liked it and it was worth the wait! =]]]**


	13. Reality Catching Up

**Hey all!! It has been forever since I last updated and I'm so sorry for that! School has been absolutely horrible! A nightmare! I have so much work and so many tests! But, as promised, my first break started today and I'm updating!!! Hopefully, none of you have given up on this story because I definitely intend to continue it! Anyways, I hope you like this chapter!! Enjoy =]]**

**Chapter 13: Reality Catching Up**

**Bella POV**

Edward and I were cuddling by the couch with me still sitting on his lap and we were just joking around, having fun for the first time.

"No, no, no! I so did not do that! Seriously, Edward, what kind of person do you think I am? I don't ever remember dumping coffee on you!" I'm surprised he understood me because that sentence came out in giggles! He smiled with glee and a hint of amusement.

"Actually, love, you did. And not just any old coffee, you gave me the hot and cold treatment! First you dumped freezing cold iced coffee on me then scalding hot! All on my lap now let me tell you, I was uncomfortable for days!" We laughed some more at my ridiculousness, I cannot believe I actually did that!

"Wow, I'm sorry, Edward, I can't believe I did that! That's one thing I don't really recall too clear, we've just had too many Edward/Bella fight moments." Again, we shared a secret smile together at our silly little kid antics, well mostly mine, back in the day.

"Although, I do have to admit that I kind of deserved it…" He trailed off as I saw obvious amusement on his face. Now that made me suspicious, I'm never one to do things without a good reason.

"Alright, mister, what did you do to make me dump coffee on you?" A mock admonishing look was on my face as I tried not to crack up laughing. In response to my 'stern' look, his face turned into a cute little face of guilt; it was like a five year old being caught red handed next to the cookie jar.

"Um, I may have put some of your designer clothes that Alice got you into the dryer when it's not supposed to go there so they would shrink and when you wear it—

"Okay, okay, okay! I do not need to know your naughty thoughts about me." I smiled mischievously at him and once again gave him the 'stern' look before cracking up laughing. He was just too cute!

"Hahahaha, hmm, I don't think spilled coffee is enough for that little stunt! Shrinking my designer clothes! What a scandal!" We cracked up laughing at my little Alice impersonation.

"In all honesty, we both got in trouble with Alice so we're even. I ruined your clothes and you ruined mine." He smiled cheekily at me as I just shook my head at him. Nothing could ruin this moment.

Then reality caught up to us in the form of a knock on the door. We both froze in place because the last time there was a knock on the door it caused this whole drama.

"I'll get it." Edward murmured before gently placing me on the sofa and getting up to open the door for the intruder.

"Please! We have to go to the hospital! Edward, baby, please! Please, we have to go, take me, please!" A crying Elizabeth came into the living room followed by Tanya with silent tears flowing down. She shook her head no at Elizabeth's words while Edward and I looked stunned. What's going on and who's in the hospital?

"What's going on?" Edward voiced my thoughts with a mix of confusion and horror in his face. It's as if history may be repeating itself, that's the danger. Another accident, another person.

"Hospital! Edward, hospital!" Sobs racked Elizabeth's body as she pulled her hair in a futile attempt to voice the problem. Edward and I turned to Tanya in hopes of answers.

"Billy is in the hospital." Tears freely flew down Tanya's face, why is there so much sadness these days? So many tears, so many accidents, so many secrets, so much confusion.

"He's in the hospital, Edward! Hospital! Bring him back, make him better! Do something!" Elizabeth screeched at Edward but he was standing still, frozen by shock most likely.

"Why is he in the hospital, what happened?" I at least still had my mind working so I went up to Tanya.

"I don't know, he has a weak heart so I'm guessing something to do with that. But either way, we can't go. Elizabeth's mind is not stable so I refuse to allow her to go there." Edward scowled at her words.

"Why do you care? Why are you even here?" Fury ignited in her eyes while Elizabeth kept on begging us to take her to the hospital. I feel so conflicted, there's too much going on.

"I'm here because whether you believe it or not, I do care. In a weird, twisted way I am a part of this big jumble you call a family so I care. Elizabeth is my patient and I care for her that way too."

"You are not a part of this family and as long as I live, you never will be. Now tell me, what have you done to my mother? She's never acted this way and I know Billy isn't the only reason." The smirk I expected on Tanya's face was missing; she just looked grief stricken as if his words actually hurt her.

"I haven't done anything to her, the only reason she seems a bit more emotional is because she has gone back on her medication.—

"I do not want you to give my mother medication! Just stop doing it! I can take care of my mother, I don't need you."

"Unless you want her to go back to the mental institution, I suggest you trust me, Edward! I'm not some lying, cheating bitch, okay?! I can be trusted, I'm normal! Your mother is just as important to me as she is to you."

"Oh, really? Then why did you stop giving her medication when she needed it?!" Now voices were being raised, one day we're going to end up in jail for disturbing the peace.

"Because she asked me to! What should I have done? Continued sneaking her medication when she didn't want to go numb? She wanted to remember you, Edward. She didn't want to forget you, what am I supposed to say to that?!"

"You—

"Stop it! Just stop it, both of you! Edward's biological father is in the hospital possibly with a severe heart condition and you're fighting like two toddlers?! Just stop it!" Tanya looked furious at my yelling while Edward at least had the dignity to look abashed.

"Bella, I—

"No excuses! I don't know whether or not you two care but Elizabeth is pining for her lost love because she actually can remember him! Edward's father is in the hospital! If I put myself in Elizabeth's situation I would want to go and see if he's alright. If I put myself in Edward's position I would want to know whether or not I still have a father! So the question isn't whether or not you should be in this family, it's who's driving?" Immediately after I finished, both Edward and Tanya started complaining what was wrong with my speech and that we can't go to the hospital no matter what.

"One at a time, I can't understand!" I feel like I'm a teacher by the way these two are acting and by my yelling.

"Bella, darling we can't go to the hospital! He left my mother when she was in trouble and I refuse to let her see him again no matter what!—

"Yea, _Bella_, you just don't get it! You're not in this family so stop pretending like you are and just get out and go whore off someone else's family, not this already screwed up one!" My temper flared at her words because that is not how this is! _Tanya_ of all people has no right to talk to me like that! Edward thought the same because he voiced his opinion right out.

"Tanya, now I understand the situation and I understand that we're all stressed out but you are to never talk to my Bella like that. Never, now apologize so we can move on." Other than Elizabeth's wails in the background, the room was silent as Edward and I waited for Tanya's guttural apology.

"Whatever, sorry Bella, happy now? Can we move on and go to the fact that Billy is in the hospital and we _cannot _go there under any circumstances?!" Tears welled up in her eyes, threatening to explode. There's just one thing I don't get right now, why does Tanya care so much?

"Bella, darling, sweetheart, as much as I don't want to go against you, I agree with Tanya. My mother's mental condition is obviously not very stable and who knows what will happen if she sees Billy again. The last time she saw him was when I was in high school and he visited…with Jacob." That was news to me. Elizabeth saw Billy after…the _accident_?

"Edward I feel like I still don't know the whole story yet. Can you please stop with all the secrets and tell me everything? I'm so damn tired of not knowing and finding out when it comes to situations like this! Now, you two sit down and explain to me _everything_." A scowl made itself known on Tanya's face as she reluctantly sat down while Edward moved towards me. He wrapped his arms around me and kissed me softly on the forehead, Tanya's scowl deepened.

"Love, there are no more secrets. I've told you everything.—

Before I could protest, he continued on,

"I swear, darling, I've told you everything. Yes, Elizabeth did see Billy after the, uh, _accident_…But I don't think she quite remembers…" Edward trailed off quietly while Tanya's scowl lessened slightly and I looked up at Edward for any sign of pain or misery or hurt or anger.

"Of course I remember him! Edward, how could you?! I _love_ him! Now, take me to the hospital this instant! Please, it's not fair!" Elizabeth wept more profusely than ever and she started stuttering something while on her knees in front of Edward. He bent down and helped her up onto the loveseat.

"What is it, mom?" His words seemed to have had some occult power over Elizabeth and something seemed to have clicked in her. She looked down at Edward—who was on his knees facing her—in a motherly way, swept her hand delicately over his cheek and spoke.

"Darling, he loves me too, I know it. I love him and he loves me, it's the truth. And, son, it's time you faced it." Quiet tears spilled out of both Elizabeth and Edward's eyes.

"No, mom, you don't under—

Elizabeth put a hand over his mouth, cutting him off.

"Son, he loves me, he told me so last time and he wouldn't lie. He would never lie to me; darling, I let him go. I didn't want him and, there's something I've never told you." I don't know if this is the real Elizabeth or her medication talking but Edward continued listening rapturously.

"When I found out that I was pregnant, darling, I'm so sorry, but….I didn't want you." Her words seemed to reverberate around the room as Tanya, Edward, and I regarded her with disbelief. This put a whole new meaning and level to family drama.

"What? Mom, that's impossible, you—

"I know what I told you and I know that I lied." Elizabeth stopped for a moment, closing her eyes but forcefully continued. "Your father loved you with everything, but I was young and naïve and just so stupid. I pushed him away, forced him away more like it and, because he loved me so much, he listened. After he left, I went immediately to the doctor's to get—to get better but it was too late. That day I met Edward Sr. and, oh my goodness, he made me feel so good about myself. Becoming pregnant at such a young age, I felt like a common whore but Edward Sr., he made me feel different, special and I fell for it. He convinced me to keep you and through the whole process and we fell in love. I'm sorry, this is all my fault and I just, I'm sorry. I made a mistake and now it is my chance to correct it. A proper mental condition may not be exactly what I have but I know what I'm saying, Edward, darling."

It took a couple minutes before everything that Elizabeth said could sink in and once it did the whole room erupted in chaos. Tanya was going off on a disbelieving tangent, Edward was just pure angry and showing it, and me, well, I'm still quite shocked to say anything. Finally, after 10 more minutes of chaos, the room became silent and everyone stared at Edward for his next reaction.

My poor Edward held a look of shock, disbelief, anger, and pure, solid sadness—he looked like he wanted to break down in tears of sadness and anger.

"Edward? Are you okay?" I went over to him and hugged him by the waist. He bent down slightly and whispered in my ear:

"Love, I don't believe this; why is this happening to me? Haven't I gone through enough already? Why is this happening?!" He looked down into my eyes and I felt his emotions seep through me by his hold on my waist; everything that he's gone through came to me and I wish I could just soak it all up like a sponge; I wish I could take it all away from him.

"It's okay, Edward, I'm here for you. Your mother is still in a condition, she could just be saying this, I mean, and how are we supposed to believe her?"

"That's not true; she can't be lying like this. I mean, she may have a mental condition but I don't think she could make something like this up, and she was so serious." His eyes showed how badly he wanted to believe me, how badly he wished what I said was true.

"Edward, you still don't know for sure. She only just started taking medication, this could just be some hoax of it or a defect or—

"Elizabeth, don't tell him the truth!" The door slammed open and in came Jacob.

"What?!" Tanya, Edward, and I all shouted at the same time; this day was just getting weirder and more horrible by the minute.

"What are you doing here, mongrel?!" Edward's anger was crystal clear in his voice; I think the stress of everything is finally getting to him. These past days have just been a roller coaster of emotion and stress; I don't think any of us can take anymore! Ignoring Edward, Jake went straight to Elizabeth and started questioning her:

"Did you tell him anything? What did you tell him?! I told you not to tell him the truth, I told you not to say anything! You know what Billy said!" At this, Elizabeth's head turned up and her eyes narrowed in on Jacob.

"I know what he said, Jacob, but I also know what is best for my son and I think he deserves to be told the truth! Why should I continue to make Billy look like the bad guy when he's not?! I'm the bad guy! I'm a failure as a mother and isn't that enough? I don't need this burden anymore!" Her voice was cracking by the end of her rant and she regarded Jacob in complete confusion and horror.

"But Elizabeth, damn it! He wasn't supposed to ever find out! Isn't that what Billy told you?! Isn't that what he said?! Isn't that what we agreed?! And Bella—

He cut off before he could say anymore but what about me? What was he going to say? What the hell is going on?!

"Would somebody care to explain ANY of this?" Tanya had had enough. Jake and Elizabeth simply looked perplexed at her question, as if they were just having a regular old conversation and she interrupted.

"Nothing that you guys don't know already thanks to Elizabeth here." Vitriolic humor came from Jake's lips as he replied to Tanya.

"Excuse me?! Thanks to me? Have I not explained already? Edward needs his father! He's never met the man and now he's in the hospital because of me and none of you will let me go see him?!" Edward's head snapped up; whoa, whoa, whoa, Billy is in the hospital _because_ of Elizabeth?!

"What did you do to him?! All these years of lying to me and putting me through that hell hole with Edward Sr., isn't enough?! Now you went and killed my real father?! The only person that is my living relative that I can actually trust?! That's it! Enough! I'm going out of here. Come on, Bella." Edward grabbed my hand and pulled me out the door while ignoring everyone else's comments. As he pulled me into the elevator, I started asking him where exactly he was taking us.

"Edward, where are we going? I know that you feel confused in all the emotions you're going through but running away isn't going to solve anything; we should talk to them, we should—

"Bella, I don't want to talk to anyone but you. Look, Bella, I just feel so screwed up right now and I know running away is never the solution but that is exactly what I'm going to do right now." The elevator dinged at the lobby and he stepped out of the apartment building into the pouring rain and rumbling thunder.

"Edward! It's raining badly, we should go back inside! Or go to Carlisle's or Alice's! I don't want you to get sick!" I had to scream for him to hear me because of the rain but he heard me and chuckled sarcastically in response. With a bitter, crooked smile, he held me by the waist and spoke:

"Love, I don't want you to get sick. I'm sorry I dragged you into this; just go back inside and out of this rain. I'll come back later, I just need to think." With that, he started running down the sidewalk while I stared at his back. Wait, I'm not going to let him just run off and with that last thought I started running after him.

I don't know exactly where he's going but I've been try to follow him for almost an hour now, in the pouring rain. Finally, after what seemed like hours later he stopped at the entrance to a forest. I know this forest, he took me here once. A long time ago but I remember. This is the entrance to our meadow. He told me that he only comes here when he feels like doing some serious thinking. I guess it's a good thing I followed him.

When we finally reached the entrance to the meadow, he spoke:

"Bella, love, will you never listen to me? I told you to go back inside; I don't want you to get sick." He turned around and I saw the genuine concern for me; it's as if he's putting all his attention on me so he doesn't have to think about anything else. I walked up to him and put my hand on his cheek; the rain was still pouring all around us.

"Edward, I know you're not feeling okay right now and I love you so, so much. That's why I followed you and that's why I'm here right now." He looked torn between something, as if he's deciding something or having an inner war.

"I love you too, Bella but I'm such a screwed up person. My life is not normal and it never will be. I'm so sorry you have to be a part of that." His hand touched my cheek so gently and he gazed into my eyes deeply. "It's just my life is a whirlwind of scandal, shock, and drama. I'm a living soap opera and, Bella; you don't deserve all of this nonsense. You deserve so much more than me; it's not fair!" Anger started to replace his sorrow.

"This isn't fair! I haven't ever done anything to deserve all of this shit in my life! My mother has been lying to me my entire life, a father whom I though I hated actually turns out to be the good guy, and I'm just caught in between everything and this all happens right after you and I actually together! It's not fucking fair!" His anger spread through him so much that he punched a tree really hardly and I saw blood on his hand.

"Edward—

"Bella—

He cut me off by kissing me ferociously. The kiss wasn't like anything before; it was violent, passionate, needing. He continued kissing me roughly while pushing me back against the tree he just punched.

"Edward—

"Shh—

The kiss continued, as if he was showing me how much he needed me, how much he wanted me. His hands held me tightly while he continued to show his raw passion. I felt as thought this would go farther than just a kiss when, suddenly, he stopped.

Edward started backing away from as if I had a disease or something. His eyes were wide in shock.

"No, no, no, Bella, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, I can't—

What is he talking about? Why is he sorry? I get that he needs to let his feelings out but I'm so confused.

"Edward, what's wrong?" By now, Edward was at the other side of the meadow and I had to, once again, shout for him to hear me and vice versa.

"Bella, I shouldn't have, I'm so sorry."

"What shouldn't you have, Edward?" He replied so quietly that I had to strain to hear him;

"I shouldn't have kissed you." My heart stopped a beat before continuing at a slightly faster pace. I walked over to him and knelt down so I was face to face with him.

"Edward, what do you mean?" He looked up at me in anguish.

"I shouldn't have kissed you…like that. I'm so sorry, Bella, I almost took advantage of you. I just feel so messed up right now and all of that was coming out, huh, what am I talking about? There's no excuse for what I almost did." He looked like he was in complete agony over what just happened.

"It's okay; it was only a kiss, Edward. You weren't taking advantage of me at all. You didn't even do anything but kiss me!"

"Yea but if that continued I could have done something horrible! Bella, forgive me, I'm so sorry. Please, love, I didn't mean to, I—

"Edward! Stop it! I forgive you! I forgive you." Eyes of emerald glanced deeply into mine and I saw sorrow and self-hate in them.

"Bella, I don't deserve you. You're so pure and good and I'm such a horrible monster. My life is just nothing but sadness and horror. You don't deserve this. You—

"Stop it! You can't choose your life, Edward! Even though you went through all of that bad stuff in your past, you still grew up to be such a good person! Such a wonderful, caring, loving husband! Edward, I love you and I don't care whether we deserve each other or not but as long as I want you and you want me then we belong together…You do…want me, don't you?" Doubt crept into me; maybe this is why he was apologizing, he doesn't want me! But he quickly got up on his knees and held me by the waist.

"No, no! Of course I want you, I'll always want you. But Bella, I don't deserve you," before I could interrupt with my argument he shushed me and continued, "Shh, darling, I know that you think we belong together but darling my life is not sunshine and daisies. You deserve someone normal, you deserve a normal life. One that could lead to a happy marriage, a white picket fence house, a huge family, beautiful grandchildren, and, finally, death with the person most perfect for you."

"But Edward I want all of those things with you! You're the one that I want to marry, to have a white picket fence house with, to have a huge family with, to have beautiful grandchildren with, and to die alongside! Edward, I want you and only you!" Before I could continue on, Edward kissed me deeply. This was the type of kiss I wanted to share with him; it held so much love and passion but in a gentle way.

After a while, we broke apart and just stared into each other's eyes. He sighed and spoke:

"Bella, we need to talk."

**Wow, again it's been forever since I updated and I really wish I haven't become a novice in writing…Please tell me if you liked it or not! I really look forward to all of your guys' comments!!! **

**Live well. Laugh often. Love always. **


	14. I want you, you want me

**Hey all!!! Thank you so much for the reviews! I really appreciate them!! I would also like to thank those of you that are continuing reading this even though it's been three months since my last update!! Again, school is a LOT of work, speaking of which I should probably do my homework :P Anyways, this is the next chapter!! Enjoy =]**

**Chapter 14: I want you, you want me; let's keep it that way**

**Edward POV**

"What is it, Edward?" She looked so distraught; all of this shit that's been happening must be getting to her, she's worrying about me when she shouldn't be. The rain came down heavier around us but we couldn't feel it; we were in our own little bubble and nothing could interrupt it but me and what I was going to do.

"Bella, I love you—

"I love you, too." A tear formed at the corner of her eyes and I just so badly wanted to wipe it away, to wipe the pain away; it's as if she knows subconsciously what I'm about to do. I sighed shakily and continued:

"Bella, I love you, but—

Thunder crackled loudly before I could say any more and when I opened my mouth again, a tree branch nearby fell down loudly. I moved closer to her so as to protect her from any other falling objects. When I opened my mouth to say more, once again, thunder rumbled loudly and lightning struck not too far away.

"Bella, I—

This time my cell phone ringing interrupted us; it's as if the universe doesn't want me to say the next horrible, destructive words. Giving Bella an apologetic and regretful look, I talked into my phone.

"Hello?" Black's voice came out frantically. What's he so worried about?

"Edward, get the fuck over here, now!" What is he talking about?

"What the hell are you talking about, Black?!" As soon as those words came out, Bella appeared more concerned for me than ever; she moved closer and I could smell her sweet, delicious freesia scent.

"Edward, damn it, get to the hospital! Dad just had another heart attack and he's begging to see you! Get the fuck over here, man!" Hospital? Dad? Billy. My eyes widened as realization hit me. Billy, I mean, _dad_ has been in the hospital this whole time! He's had _another_ heart attack?!

"Edward, what's wrong? What did Jacob say to you?" Bella's sweet, angelic voice came to me as she hovered over me, clearly worried about me again.

"We have to get to the hospital, now." Urgency danced throughout my otherwise calm tone. Bella's eyes also widened and she looked horrorstruck.

"What happened? Is Billy alright? Is he, is he—

"Shh, darling, come on." Even though it was going to kill me later, I pecked Bella, my Bella, lightly on the lips and picked her up bridal style. With her in my arms, I started running out through the thick, dense forest.

By the time we got out of the shade of the trees, the rain had slightly lessened but Bella and I were drenched from the beginning.

"I can walk from here, Edward." The slightest bit of annoyance swept through her otherwise angelic voice and I hugged her briefly before placing her down gently. She never did like being babied but as long as I can, I will baby her because I love her too much. I hailed a taxi down when we got to the streets and suddenly everything was slamming down on me. My father, he was, he was…_dying_. I've truly never genuinely met the man and he's dying.

"Where to?" The cab driver pulled me out of my stupor but Bella answered for me and she comforted me the whole ride there. By the time we go there, I was completely out of it. Everything seemed to hazy to me, Bella took care of everything and before I even knew it I was in front of my father's room.

"Son, please, you've been standing there for 10 minutes, say something, do something." Carlisle appeared in front of me and shook me out of the daze.

"What? Is that? Is he, is he in there?" They all knew who I was talking about and replied nodding their heads up and down. Taking a deep breath, I pushed the door open and saw him lying in the hospital bed with tubes all around him; Jacob was sitting next to the bed grief stricken. He looked up as I came in and slightly nodded his head and left the room silently. Bella understood that I needed to do this alone and she stayed outside with everyone else; Elizabeth and Tanya were no where to be seen.

"Dad?" I whispered the word so quietly but some occult power made it so that he heard me. My father slowly fluttered his eyes open and I saw him; for the first time in my life, I genuinely, truly saw my father. He looked at me in amazement as did I. The curious thing was while I looked exactly like my mother; Jacob looked exactly like my father. Billy and Jacob were almost exact replicas except for the fact that Billy didn't have hair as long as Jake's.

He had tan skin, noir-black hair, eyes of a comforting dark, dark brown, and a fatherly smile. There were wrinkles around his face but it didn't make him look ancient at all, he looked wise and knowledgeable about life.

"Edward? Is that you, son?" His voice was rough and sounded as though he just woke up from a long dream.

"Yes, um, dad, it's…me." As soon as I spoke, he tried sitting up to get a better look at me but ended up falling back on the pillow because of how weak he was.

"Don't, um, don't strain yourself…dad." It sounded so weird to say the word "dad" to this man whom I thought to be a sick, repulsive person when he really was not at all.

"Son, come here, let me get a good look at you." I slowly walked closer to him, but each step was like a year of my life going by. When I finally reached him, he held his hand out to me and I grabbed it. There are no words to describe this. This feeling, this moment, this thing is just…everything all at once.

"Dad, I—hi, wow, um…" I don't quite know what to say. What should I say? I mean, I'm 26 years old yet I'm really meeting my father for the first time, this is weird and awkward but in a good way. In response, he just laughed a good hearty laugh while I committed it to memory. Who knows how long I'll have to get to know him. That did it, now the tears started. I do like to say I'm a man but I also have those moments; and this is just one of those moments.

"Edward, son, it's so good to see you. But first, I wanted to apologize; I'm so sorry that I haven't been there for you, Edward. When your mother was with that scoundrel, son of a gun…" He was getting worked up calling very colorful names to Edward Sr., huh, so he does care; he really, truly cares. "…bastard, one that doesn't know a woman's worth of a man, I should have done something. I'm sorry, son, I'm sorry that I haven't been there for you; I guess I can understand if you hate me." Big, gulping tears escaped from his eyes and I just felt completely horrible. How could I have ever hated this man?

"Dad, you don't need to apologize; uh, mom explained everything to me and I don't hate you at all. Right now, you're my hero, dad." What I did next completely surprised the both of us; I went and gave him a hug. Tears continued down his face as he laughed and slightly cried at the same time.

"Ha, should have known your mother would do that; look, son, just don't hate her too much. She was young at the time and she didn't know what she was doing. You—

"I have every right to be a little bit angry with her right now, dad! She was young well so were you! You had the common sense yet she—she wanted to get rid of me! And all these years she told me that sick, cruel lie making me hate my own father! Now the first time I truly meet you is while you're on your deathbed! It's not fair and I have every right to be angry!" So much anger and resentment pulsed through me that I felt like punching a wall but that would just be ridiculous.

"Son, calm down, I'm not on my deathbed and I do not want to hear you talking to about your mother in such a tone!" I laughed humorlessly in reply.

"Then what do you call a heart attack that near killed you?" Dad sighed and replied:

"That was just a minor something, the doctor says I'll have to rest a little and I'll be good as new. But like I was saying before, I do not want to hear that tone about your mother. She is your mother, she loves you dearly, and she is not well at the moment so it's best not to pick a fight with her and drive a wedge into this already twisted family." At that, I sighed too and nodded my head in agreement; he really does love her with everything in this world.

"Alright, dad, I don't want to fight with you so let's change the subject. So, what do you work as?" That may seem like a random question but to me it's one of the many things about my dad what I don't know.

"Well, like you, I'm actually a business owner, a small one but nonetheless, a business owner…" And we conversed like that for hours on end. I really got to know my dad and he got to know me; I even told him all about Bella.

"You know your face lights up every time her name comes up, you must be madly in love with her. I'd like to meet this special woman that stole my boy's heart." My smile grew a million miles when he said that. I could just picture it: Bella, my beautiful Bella, dressed in a gorgeous blue dress and she's blushing that wonderful blush of hers while I'm taking her to meet dad; she'll be all nervous and when dad opens the door, he'll fall immediately for her charm as I did. Just as I thought about how wonderful that would be, reality caught up as the door burst open and in came my mother, hysterical.

"Billy!" She ran over to the other side of him, hugging him firmly; this is why I can't have my Bella. It isn't fair. Why does it have to be this way?!

This time my anger coursed so deeply, especially after seeing Elizabeth and dad kiss, that I punch a hole in the wall.

"Edward!" Out of all the people shouting my name, I only heard one and it was my beautiful Bella's. She ran into the room quickly and wrapped her arms around mine, getting me calm with just her touch.

"Edward, look at me." I did as she said and looked into those deep, chocolaty eyes of hers. "Are you okay? Did you hurt your hand badly? Does it hurt you?" She looked so concerned for me that my guilt and regret multiplied a thousand times more than I even thought it could go.

"Edward, what's wrong?" Again, she looked at me with such concern and care that I had to close my eyes away from it.

"Follow me." Quietly I said the catalytic words to my life's ruin. Everyone else stared at us as I pulled Bella out of the door but no one said anything.

I kept walking and walking until we were outside of the hospital and past that down through the streets until I found an empty alleyway. The whole time, Bella followed me silently. Once we were slightly inside the alley I turned to talk to her.

Before I even started talking, I saw tears in her eyes; she knew what was coming, she what I was going to do, and I hope she can understand why I'm doing this.

"Bella—

"Why, Edward? I know what you're going to do but I just need to know why? Why are you breaking up with me when we just got together?!" Guilt racked through my body; guilt and resentment.

"Darling, I love you but—

"Don't say that to me!" She screeched as she started sobbing; "why are you doing this?!" My breath came out shaky, how could I explain this to her? I want her so badly but she deserves better, I'm not a complete person right now and I need to sort my life out and get back on track before I'm able to cherish her like the princess she is.

"I need to sort through my life before I can have all my attention on you, darling. I love you and I don't want to let you go but before we can call ourselves a 'married couple' I need to come to terms with my past. My beautiful Bella, I love you so much but I just need you to understand this. I'm not leaving you and I never will leave you but I think we just need a break for a while." Tears of both anger and sadness cascaded throughout her body as she cried; I feel like a complete monster for making this angel cry. Isn't there another way I can do this? Another way that doesn't have me breaking up with her? But I don't deserve her and I have to come to terms with that. This angel needs prince not some peasant like me.

"If you love me so much, then why are you doing this?! Just stop! I want you, you want me; let's keep it that way! Why are you ruining this perfect thing between us?! Edward, you don't need to do this; especially if this is about you not deserving me then it's ridiculous because I don't care about any of that shit! You say you love me and I love you so there's no need for all of this. We can sort through your past _together_! Edward, I'm not doing this! I refuse to let you break up with me because I know you don't want to. You're just doing this because _you_ think it's what is right when it isn't!" She was right.

My Bella knows me better than anyone else in this world. She knows that I'm not breaking up with her with the intentions of getting back together. She knows my motives for this. But she doesn't understand the concept that I don't deserve her. My life is crumbling around me and I'm learning new things about my past almost everyday. She deserves a more stable life.

"Bella, I don't deserve you and I wish you could understand that. You deserve a stable life and that's something I can't provide you with. I'm just coming to terms with stuff that happened years ago and I'm learning new things about my past everyday. I don't want you to be on this rollercoaster hell ride; I want you to be happy and not stressed out and worried almost every hour of the day. I love you and I hope you can understand that; come on, let's get you home." I wasn't about to leave her in some alleyway but she wouldn't budge from her spot. She was still crying and I think I started too.

"Come on, darling." I picked her up as she continued crying while my heart just continued breaking at my own idiocy.

**Bella POV**

The tears controlled my body as I felt Edward carrying me wherever the hell he was taking me. I can't believe this was happening; I mean, I had an intuition at the meadow but I thought that was resolved until he said he wanted me to follow him. I just can't understand why the hell he wants to do this! He's being such an idiot! I know for a fact that he doesn't want to do this yet there he goes and does it! What goes on in that boy's brain?!

As soon as I heard car door slam and Edward pay the taxi driver, I realized where we were. We were at _his_ apartment.

"Why are we here?" I know it may not seem the most rational path to go but I'm angry at him and I'm going to make it known. Edward is being a complete idiot and he's going to feel my anger until he stops being stupid.

"Bella, this is—

"I'm just going to go sleep over at Alice's tonight and, in fact, I think I'm going to move there. After all, this is _your_ apartment." Being rude to him, after all these months, was actually breaking me. But I can't let myself feel. If I feel then I think I will die. I have to be strong and just show him that he needs me like a fish needs water. I have to show him that he cannot live without me no matter what he thinks or may happen or may have happened.

"Well, um, are you sure? I—

"Yes, I'm sure." There, it'll hurt less if I say less to him.

"Okay, then, um, let me at least give you a ride. Co—

"Fine." The less I look at him, the less I talk to him, and the less I think about him the less it will hurt; I hope. Silently he went to the apartment, got his Volvo keys and met me in front of it.

Without bothering to wait for him to open my door like I know he would, I opened my own door and got in. The car ride was silent; I could tell Edward wanted to say something but I had nothing to say. Right now I have to concentrate on not breaking down, curling up into a ball, and crying my heart out. How could he do this to me? He doesn't think he 'deserves me'?! What a stupid concept! He's the one who deserves someone better than me. Wait, maybe that's why he's breaking up with me, no, he said he loved me. That has to mean something! I shouldn't think about this, I'll just cry again.

When we got to Alice's place, I opened and slammed the door shut without a word to him. He remained in the driveway until he saw Alice open the door and when she did, the tears came again.

"Oh my gosh, Bella! What happened? Wasn't that just Edward? Why are you—

She stopped talking seeing as how I cried harder when she said his name. Alice took me inside and let me cry it out on her couch for hours and hours until, finally, I calmed down.

"Here, go take a shower, change into these and we can have a nice, long talk." Silently, I took the sweats from Alice and went to go take a shower. On my way to the bathroom, I saw the clock and it read an hour past midnight! Jasper must already be asleep, I'm ruining their night. And that just started the tears again but when I got into the shower, my tears mixed with the water so it wasn't noticeable.

The thoughts came again. Why is he doing this to me?! What did I do to deserve this? Can't he understand that I'll love him no matter what and I cannot move on, ever. No matter what happens in the future, my heart will always belong to him.

After a good, long shower I came out and saw Alice sitting on the couch with a cup of hot chocolate in her hands.

"Grab your cup, dump some marshmallow's in it and let's chat." Her voice was calm and steady but I saw the worry and frantic nervousness in her eyes. I took my cup, sat down, and poured everything that happened between Edward and me out into the open air. Alice was a good listener the whole time; she smiled comfortingly at the hard parts but remained silent until I was finished.

When I did finish, she was still quiet for a couple minutes but then all of a sudden she was screaming jumbled words together too fast to understand and cursing Edward every now and then.

"What the HELL was he thinking?! HOW COULD HE DO THIS?! After EVERYTHING that happened?! And ALL of the SHIT he said about wanting you back when you left him?!..." She continued on and on and she was so loud that Jasper came running out in only his boxers, half asleep and with a baseball bat in his hands.

"Where?! Who?! Alice?" He came out frantically but then looked confusingly at Alice as she was still screaming and cursing Edward. When he realized that he would not get an answer out of her, he turned towards me. I saw Jasper's eyes widened at the tears on my face and in my eyes before he spoke.

"Bella? What happened?" His voice was gentle and soothing as he talked to me. Before I could reply, Alice did for me:

"Oh, I'll tell you what happened! That dickhead brother of yours broke my Bella's heart seeing as how he BROKE UP WITH HER!" And off she went on another tangent.

"What?!" That was Jasper's reaction; we both watched as Alice continued her mini rant and when she was done, Jasper sat down on the couch;

"When did this happen? Do you know why? How? Why?" Jazz appeared so confused and I was about to explain but, once again, Alice cut in for me.

"This happened today! TODAY! Right at the hospital, actually! Remember, when Edward left with Bella! Yea, your dickhead brother was going to break her heart! And why?! Well, I'll tell you why! It's because he thinks he 'doesn't deserve her'," she mimicked a deep voice to represent Edward, "And I don't know what the hell else he was thinking! Ugh, Jasper I swear that if I ever see him again, ugh, I am going to rip him apart in all ways possible, murder him by the customs of every single tribe on earth, and burn the left remains!" Jasper and I looked kind of disgusted at Alice's very explicit hand motions and description but the thought of Alice attacking my Edward had me at panic.

"No, Alice! You can't! I may hate him right now but you can't do that! He loves me and I love him but we just need him to realize that he's being stupid right now." Alice looked as though she couldn't believe someone like me existed and Jasper regarded me with happiness and concern laced together. Opposites attract indeed.

"Bella! How can you say that when he just broke your heart?!"

"Alice, I can say it because I love him and even though he broke my heart, I just can't let something bad happen to him." My poor pixie friend, she looked slightly confused but then the worst thing of all happened: she got a smirk on her face. As my eyes widened, her smirk became more pronounced and Jasper remained silent looking back and forth between us.

"What if you're the one doing something bad to him?"

"What?" She started skipping in tiny little circles; okay, after that raging torrent she is way too chipper, she has an evil plan.

"Well, if you say that he loves you then he wouldn't mind you doing something bad to him, now would he?" I looked at her confused more than ever while Alice just smirked again.

"Oh, my naïve Bella; I'm talking about taking some sweet, sexy revenge on Edward."

**I'm assuming you all know what Alice's plan is?? Not to give anything away but it is super obvious what she's going to do… The next update might take longer than this one, these chapters are getting harder and harder to write as the story continues but I will try my hardest for all you avid readers out there! .Anyways; I hope you liked the chapter!!! Tell me what you think =]**

**Oh, and by the way would anybody be interested in reading a story—not a fanfic but an actual story—that's summary is this:**

**Death is something most humans fear. They all talk about it, they all joke about it, they all think about it, and they all fear it. But not me, I'm special and unique in my own way. Humans are idiotic, stupid, and most are masochistic; they're weak, brittle, and oh so easy to crush. They say one thing but do another, huh, such hypocrites. Who am I to say such things? Well, my name is Death. Ever heard of it? Yeah, I thought so. **

**If you are, can you please tell me!!! =]]**


	15. Sweet, Sexy Revenge

**Hey all of my lovely readers! Thank you all so much for reviewing the last chapter!! I am sorry to inform you all but my break ends the day after tomorrow so I might not be able to update anymore! But let's not think too much about that now, I made this chapter extra long to hopefully satisfy all of your hungry minds! Enjoy =]**

**Chapter 15: Sweet, Sexy Revenge **

**Bella POV**

"Alice, honey, maybe you should think about that some more; I mean, Edward's only a man, I don't think he can handle whatever you're planning." I couldn't help it but I chuckled at Jasper's genuine concern for his brother; it's true though, Alice can be a bundle of horror, amusement, and annoyance all in one.

"Oh, Jazzy you're so cute! But no, if Edward is a man he should be able to handle this medication for his stupidity! Remember, a spoonful of sugar makes the medicine go down!" Alice tinkled her lovely and scary laugh while looking up at Jasper cutely. Of course, he gave in to her charisma immediately.

"Okay, moving on, Jazzy you can go back to sleep, Bella and I are going to stay up and plan!" With that, she pushed Jasper out of the room and turned to me with an evil smile on her face. Suddenly, worry took over me; what exactly is Alice planning for Edward? I don't want to hurt him or anything. Slowly, I started backing away from Alice while talking in a calm voice to her.

"Alice, what are you planning? Let's just make sure it won't hurt Edward…" I trailed off at the new expression of pure amusement on Alice's face—that face never means anything good.

"Bella, darling, would I ever hurt Edward permanently?" Notice how she said 'permanently'. "We're just going to have fun with Edward and make sure that boy gets into his thick skull that he needs you!" That doesn't seem so bad but coming from Alice, you never know.

"What exactly does this plan detail?" She smiled in response.

"Bella, we're going to make him _want_ you. Really, truly _want_ you in every way possible." The way she put emphasis on 'want' did not do anything to soothe my worries. I've had this happen before with Edward but do I really think I can do that again? Portray the ultimate woman when I'm really broken inside? Right now, I don't think I can, especially to the man that did this to me.

"Wait one second; let me go get a notebook so we can write some stuff down!" At that note, Alice left the room in a hurry to go look for a notebook and pen, leaving me alone to think by my self. By my self…I'm all alone now.

As soon as Alice left, the memories started coming to me. Edward rejected me, he thinks he doesn't deserve me, he _broke up_ with me. This is impossible! Just how can he think like this?! The tears started running down my cheeks as the truth kept hitting me over and over again. I lay down on the couch so I didn't have to worry about holding myself up; it's as if there is huge piece of me that's missing.

"Bella! I'm back! Oh my gosh! What's wrong? I thought we were over the crying stage and onto the 'I wanna get better' stage." Alice sauntered over to me on the couch carefully. And through my sobs I spoke;

"Alice, I don't think I can do what you—what you want me to—to do." This time, Alice's voice came out softly and with total concern.

"Oh, honey, I'm sorry am I pushing you too fast? Oh, Bella! You know that he doesn't mean it! Darling, you know that Edward loves you like Oreos love cream and milk! My plan is to appeal to his more manly side, if you know what I mean, so we can get the idiot to realize that you are the cream and milk to his Oreo! So, what do you say?" Alice was so cute and funny, she was trying so hard to make me feel better but I know that the only person who can do that is Edward; and if the only way to get my Edward back to me is to go along with Alice's crazy plan, then I'm going to give my heart and soul into it.

So, I wiped my tears, got up off the couch and faced Alice head on.

"I'm ready, Alice." Alice stared right back into my eyes and smiled comfortingly.

"We can totally get started but I've decided we can put this off for later; now get to bed missy! You know where the room is!" And with that, Alice left the room quickly. It's as if she knows that I'm not ready to do anything but I am, right?

Following Alice's example, I headed off to bed but once there I couldn't sleep. Edward was always there for me when I was asleep, whether in another room or not he was there. The only time I remember sleeping without him would be when I had amnesia but now that I know everything, I can't do it. He was the rock in my life, always there for me. And now, what? Sure, I may have hated him before but he was still always there for me and he loved me. I could just imagine Edward's arms around me as we lay in bed together just staring into each other's eyes. He'd smile that wonderful crooked smile and I'd blush and then his smile would get bigger and then he'd lean in ever so slightly and brush his soft lips with mine…

I could just imagine Edward storming over here, being super angry because he can't be comfortable without me, and I'd come outside and he'd be down on his knees begging me to take him back. He'd plead and plead but I'd just smile lean down and kiss him full on the lips. I'd tell him that I forgive him for everything and that he doesn't need to apologize because I know he was just being stupid at the time. If only he'd come here…

The phone ringing cut me out of my trance and I quickly sat up in bed.

"Who the hell would call at this ungodly hour?!" There's Alice for you. I saw her storm into the living room and pick up the phone.

"Hello?!" The annoyance in her voice was palpable. Suddenly, her features didn't show anger but shock, utter shock, and then anger again.

"What the hell?! I don't think so!" Before I could hear anymore she went into her room and shut the door but I swear I heard her say 'Bella is staying here, you dickhead!' So, Edward's calling. He's calling! That means he really does miss me as much as I miss him! But why won't Alice let me talk to him?

"Alice, let me talk to him! Open the door, Alice!" She opened the door but she wasn't on the phone anymore.

"Bella, you can't talk to him!" This angered me, why won't she let me talk to him? He's my husband!

"Why?! He's my husband!" As soon as those words escaped my lips, it hit again. He's not _my_ anything.

"Bella, I'm so sorry! Are you okay? Do you need me to stay with you until you fall asleep?" I didn't realize but tears were falling again. Again and again and again and again, they just kept falling as I lay down trying to fall asleep and leave this cruel world if only for a couple hours.

The next day I woke up feeling numb; I couldn't feel anything at all. I just sat in bed until Alice came and dragged me out; she decided to stay home with me for a while because I'm definitely not going to work right now. I don't even know if I still work there or not. The whole day I didn't do anything except sit on the couch staring into blank space; what's there to do if I don't have Edward? He's really my only thing and I took advantage of that before but I understand now that I don't have him. Funny how life works that way; you don't know what you have until you lose everything.

Soon enough, a week passed and I didn't even notice. Every day I had the same routine: wake up, sit in bed for an hour, eat something that Alice will force down, sit on the couch all day, eat again when Alice forces me to, say hello to Jasper, go to bed, sit there for however long, fall asleep, and repeat. Every single say the same thing until today when Alice catapulted herself into my room and started yelling at me to do something about my depressed existence.

"Isabella Marie Swan, this is enough! Today is the day that we are going to start doing something about you! You just sit and stare at the wall all day! Bella, what did I tell you before? Edward cares about you! If you haven't noticed, let me enlighten you! He comes here everyday, he calls almost every hour, and he tries sending you letter and all this other crap!" By now Alice was shaking my shoulders and staring at me in the face. Wait, what?!

"Edward, he—he comes _here_?! He calls? What—why—huh?" Alice sighed exasperatedly and smacked her hand to her forehead.

"Bella, Edward loves you and won't leave you the heck alone! He's worried sick about you because I won't tell him anything nor will I let him talk to you or see you! And Jasper says that Edward is always bothering him at the office, when he does come, about you! Now get this into your head, Edward loves you like a hobo loves a bathtub! So we're going to finally put my plan in action, I think I've left you plenty of time to mope about it." Without even giving me a chance to reply, Alice dragged me into her room and strapped me into the 'torture chair'.

"Alice, what are you going to do to me?" My voice came out in a sepulchral and worried tone; guess I'm just not so used to talking and being happy. She smiled back at me cautiously.

"I'm not going to do anything damaging, Bella…I'm just going to give you a makeover." She said the last part so quietly but I heard it.

"You're what?! Alice, please, I promise I'll start getting active in life just please don't do this to me! Please?! Haven't I suffered enough?" An Alice makeover is not what I need right now! What I need is Edward and damn it! She's right! The only way to get him is to do something about it; Alice's way is usually the only way to get things done and didn't I promise myself I'd give it my heart and soul? But a _makeover_! I absolutely hate makeovers!

"Bella! Stop fighting with yourself and stay put while I makeover you; whether you like it or not this will happen so deal with it." I didn't fail to notice the threatening tone in Alice's voice so I sat down pouting and let her put globs of stuff on my face.

After hours and hours of this torture, according to Alice I had gotten a full facial, manicure, pedicure, and my hair styled. Lucky for me she decided to put make up on me another day so I was saved from that.

"Alice, are we done now?" I know I'm whining but I really don't want to do any of this. All I want is Edward and nothing else.

"Yes, my dear Bella, we're done!" Alice squealed like the pixie I know she is.

"Thank-you!" With that, I ran out of the room only to be stopped by Alice again.

"Bella! Where are you going? I meant that we're done with the technical stuff but we still have to go shopping for new outfits!" Shopping?! Today is my worst nightmare! This woman just cannot leave me alone, can she?

"Alice, that's not fair! I sat through all of that stuff quietly, didn't I?! Please, I'm just not in the mood." I looked at her pleadingly and with a puppy dog face but she didn't cave in.

"I'm sorry Bella, but I'm doing everything in my power to make sure that you will not resort to that walking zombie existence. Now, we definitely need to go shopping because you need a new wardrobe! Since both of us are going to work tomorrow, I want to make sure that you look your best!" Wait! Did she say what I think she said? Me, going to work?!

"I cannot go to work! For one, I don't even know if I'm fired or not and two, I don't think I can be there with Edward and not cry." My eyes found hers and I'm sure she saw the hurt in them. "Alice, don't get me wrong, I do want Edward back but I just—I just don't know how to act around him. Do I talk to him? Should I smile at him? What if he sees me staring at him? What if he's gorgeous and I jump him or something? What do I do?!" She gazed back at me with amusement and worry and replied:

"Bella, Bella, Bella, it will be okay! I'll tell you exactly what to do with him, just listen to me, okay? Now come with me to the mall and yes, you are going to work tomorrow." I decided to just go ahead and listen to Alice so I got inside her yellow Porsche.

While on the way to the mall, Alice blasted out music from the radio and sang along; I sat quietly and stared out the window. I wonder what Edward's doing right now…

"Bella! Oh no, you are not going there! I am not going to give you a moment's chance to start moping, so, let's talk! Just to tell you, I invited Rosalie and she said that she'd meet us at the mall." Wow, I haven't seen Rosalie in ages! I guess this is a good thing, I mean she is my friend. To Alice, I simply smiled and nodded but apparently that wasn't convincing enough for her.

"No, Bella I want to TALK with you, not me talk and you nod and smile. So start talking, missy!"

"What do I say?"

"I don't know….oh! I got it; tell me Edward's quirks and stuff. What makes him really angry or really want you?" We were going into an uncomfortable zone for me but Alice kept pushing it so I caved in and started talking about the man I'm pining for.

"Well, he gets really jealous really easily. Um, he used to say that he absolutely adores my blush—

I stopped talking. The memories with Edward were just overflowing. It's not that I'm upset because I think he doesn't want me; I realize that he wants to be with me too but he thinks that I should have someone better even though I'm with the most perfect man on earth; it's just that I miss him so much and thinking about all of this makes me want him that much more.

"Bella, why are you crying? Are you still upset? Come on, I thought you were a strong, independent woman! Cheer up! We're going to get Edward back to you! Don't you want to put your all into this?" I nodded my head yes; "Then come on! Stop crying and get your act together so we can get this show on the road!" Alice's little speech made me feel a bit empowered so I wiped the tears away and smiled at her. I'm going to put my all into this plan and it better work.

We got to the mall in no time after Alice's little speech and spent the rest of Sunday shopping. Yes, I spent the whole day shopping with Alice and Rose; it was a workload but I think it was worth it. Alice helped me pick out, more so picked out by herself, all of these outfits that are bound to make Edward notice me while Rose judged them and I continued telling Alice and Rose as we went through each shop all of the things Edward said he liked about me. Now I just can't wait for tomorrow.

Alice and I came home after shopping and eating out at a restaurant with Rosalie around 8; we saw Jasper pacing the living room nervously for some reason.

"Jazzy! What's wrong?" My favorite pixie friend went up to Jasper and did the normal boyfriend/girlfriend routine of hug and kiss but he just looked at her in slight anger and relief.

"Alice, darling, where have you been?! I've been sick with worry because when I got home you weren't here!" He hugged her furiously and kissed her over and over until she put a hand over his mouth.

"Jasper, what do you mean? Bella and I went shopping, why were you so worried?"

"I didn't know you were! Put yourself in my place, darling, I come home from work and I always see your smiling face but today I came home to an empty house. Anything could have happened to you!" He continued telling her stuff that could have happened and how he was so relieved to see her and how he was so happy. This was becoming extremely uncomfortable; I could just imagine Edward and me in that situation.

"Oh and Bella, I probably shouldn't have but I told Edward and Emmett, Rose most likely is already home so that takes care of Emmett but Edward…" Jasper trailed off as he saw the expression on Alice's face.

"You, what?! How could you, Jasper?!" He looked uneasy seeing as how he had to face Alice's wrath.

"I'm sorry, honey, but I was really worried for you and none of you had your cell phones turned on and—

"Jasper! Ugh, now I have to actually call Edward and smooth things over." She sighed in annoyance and went to the phone. She was going to call him, should I talk to him? Would she let me talk to him? Do I really want to talk to him? Well, I always want to talk to him but according to the new plan, do I want to?

"Bella, I don't think you should talk to him unless there is a need for it." Alice's random answer came out of nowhere but it helped. I'll see him tomorrow and talk to him. Taking a deep breath, I headed towards my room, now I just have to prepare my heart to see Edward.

The next day came faster than I actually thought it would; my night wasn't exactly comfortable but I did get a couple hours of sleep which is better than nothing. As soon as my head lifted from the pillow, Alice came bursting in with excitement.

"Aaaahh! I'm so excited! Today's the day! This is so awesome! And Jasper just left and this is so awesome!!" I couldn't help but smile at her enthusiasm to use me as a human Barbie doll. She pulled me out of bed and dragged me straight into her room and onto her make-up chair.

"So, Alice, how long is this going to take exactly?" My nerves were finally kicking in as I realized that I would finally see Edward today! It's been a week since I last saw the man and I don't ever remember being apart from him for so long!

"Don't worry, I'm going to try going really fast but I do want to tell you something…" I looked up at her curiously and saw that she was biting her lip nervously.

"What is it, Alice?"

"Ummm, remember how I called Edward yesterday? Well, at first he was all angry with me because I didn't make sure that someone knew where we were and he was worried sick for you and then he really wanted to talk to you but I was like no way you can't and then he asked why not and I said because that it wasn't right because you were still healing and then he said he felt really bad and he wanted to see you to make sure that you were okay but then I said that he couldn't because that would make you feel worse and then we had this whole, huge fight on it, I'm surprised you didn't hear it, and then I told him that you were coming to work today and then he said he couldn't wait to see you then and that he would be taking you out to lunch…" My heart froze at her last words. He wanted to take me out to lunch? Like a date? Or are we going as 'just friends'?

"Alice, like a date?" She bit her lip again.

"I don't know! He hung up after that so I HAVE to make you look really good! Now I remember that you told me that he gets jealous real easily so Rose and I concocted this plan yesterday…Well, since yesterday was 'football Sunday' or whatever, you're going to be wearing a jersey and formal pants to work. The catch is that the jersey isn't a girl's jersey, it's a man's but don't worry it's my cousin's so you're not wearing stranger's clothing and I washed it so it's also clean." I looked up at Alice in disbelief; we were going to make him jealous? That's a lot easier said than done; I don't really want to give him the idea that I'm with someone else…

"Don't worry, he won't think you're with someone else because, hello! It's you, he knows that you won't move on that quickly and besides you're going to play innocent. You're going to pretend like nothing's wrong and we were also celebrating this 'football Sunday' that I have to find out about, okay?" I nodded as Alice continued prodding my face with product. Finally, when she was done and I pulled the outfit on myself, I looked in the mirror and, as always, gasped at my reflection.

I was wearing black dress pants with a green and yellow football jersey and the jersey had a big black belt in the middle so that it showed off my non-existent figure because the shirt was way too huge on me. Alice styled my hair in to long wavy, tresses and she put minimal make up on me, only eyeliner and mascara, which enhanced my brown eyes. She also put this lip gloss on my lips that enriched their red color. All in all, I looked gorgeous after Alice got through me.

"Wow, Alice, you're amazing, as always!" I hugged Alice tightly as we both laughed.

"And look at the back of the jersey, it says 'James Cartridge', that's my cousin's name so it makes it look like you got it from another guy!"

"Thank you so much, Alice!" She smiled and replied:

"Of course, I always do my best! Now get your cute little but off to work in these heels but grab a granola bar for breakfast!" I smiled at her motherly way, took the heels, grabbed a chewy bar, and headed off to work.

Okay, I've been pacing the office lobby for 15 minutes now, people are staring. I should just go up to the 40th floor, not be a chicken. But I don't want to, what if Edward looks so good and I can't help but kiss him? What if he, I don't know, says something sweet to me? What do I say to him? Oh my gosh! I forgot to ask Alice what to say and do around him!

"Excuse-me, miss? Can I help you?" Uh-oh, the receptionist was looking at me weirdly. Alright, now or never. So with the embarrassing amount of courage I did have in me, I headed off to the 40th floor.

As usual, there were very few people actually in this level and I saw Lauren sitting at her desk.

"Oh, are you back from the dead? Where the hell have you been?! Eddie hasn't been happy that you haven't showed up to work, you know. I wouldn't be surprised if he," she made a line across her neck with her index finger and made a 'k-k-k' noise, "too bad, and you were such a good employee!" At this she laughed kind of evilly but I just ignored her and nervously stepped into my office.

"Lauren, what do you want? Didn't I tell you that you can contact me by speaker, it's unnecessary for you to actually come into my office." His voice, oh my goodness, his voice! It was so velvety soft and I missed it so much! But it also sounded tired, stressed, and slightly annoyed. I quietly stepped into his office.

"Um, Edward, it's me." His head snapped up as soon as I spoke and his eyes darkened with lust and jealousy; guess he already noticed the jersey.

"Bella…" He breathed out my name making me blush deeply. Okay, what do I do now?

"Um, hi?" It came out like a question, this is so awkward! What do I say to the man that looks completely gorgeous with his disarrayed bronze hair and emerald green eyes and I want to kiss repeatedly but can't?!

"S, uh, sit down, so, um, are you okay?" I bit my lip for lack of anything better to do and nodded my head yes.

"Um, can you just e-mail me some stories that I should edit, and, um, I'll edit them." After I quickly rushed my words out, I keeled it out of there. Alright, okay, not exactly according to plan but what else am I supposed to do? I sat down at my desk and took a deep breath, okay, I'm a strong woman and I do not need a man to complete me! I have to get my act together and make Edward want me. Am I read for this? Not so much but I'm going to have to do it anyways, it's too late to back out.

Nothing major really happened the rest of the morning because Edward kept to his office and I was editing and doing some actual work. That is, until lunch came…

"Bella?" My head snapped up at the sound of his voice. Okay, time to start the plan in motion. Knowing it would drive him crazy; I bit my lip and leaned my elbows on my desk.

"Yes, Edward?" His eyes seemed to slightly glaze over; perfect it was working, at least I know I have some affect over him.

"Uh, um, uh, do you—do you want to go to lunch? With me?"

"Sure." I got up from my desk and dramatically turned around to make sure he sees the name on the back, grabbed my jacket off my desk chair, and headed towards him. He quietly motioned for me to go ahead. We got downstairs and he opened my door for me and drove to the restaurant. The whole time Edward was quiet and didn't say anything. We got to the restaurant and the waiter showed us our seats and gave us the menus.

"I'll be back in a while to see if you're ready to order." I smiled at the waiter and took a sip of the water that was already at the table. We both stayed silent for a couple more minutes until Edward broke it:

"So, uh, whose jersey is that?" Oh, so he was thinking about that this whole time. Hmm, should I tell him the truth or say it's my 'friends'? Well to get him more jealous might as well lie to him; wow, I'm getting some well needed confidence. I guess my heart is pining for Edward like mad.

"Oh, this thing? It's my friend James', he was quarterback at his school and I asked him for it." Edward regarded me with curiosity and jealousy but nodded his head in reply.

"Um, your friend James, how long have you known him? I haven't met him before…"

"I, uh, met him this week actually—

"You borrowed clothes from a complete stranger?!" Even though Edward was whispering, I could still hear the obvious anger.

"Not exactly, he's my friend; besides what does it matter to you?" I gave him a pointed look. He looked pained for a second before he put on a poker face.

"Bella, don't be like that, you know I love you and you know why I think we should just be friends."

"Well, Edward, if we're just friends then it wouldn't concern you what I do in my free time and with whom." Before Edward could retort, the waiter came and took our orders. The rest of lunch was fairly silent, the occasional comment about something stupid like the weather and silence again. Just like before, Edward seemed like he wanted to say something but I didn't really want to talk to him all that much. What I would really like to do is kiss him and be with him forever but for now, I'll settle for just not talking to him.

The rest of the day was normal except for the fact that Edward gave me special treatment. If he wanted to speak to Lauren, he would use the speaker but for me he would come to me personally. To Lauren, he was very distant and made her do ridiculous jobs but to me he was really sweet and gave me small, easy to do jobs at a time. He is being just completely ridiculous.

"Bella? Would you like me to give you a ride? Your truck is still at the apartment, you know." I bit my lip, blushed, and nodded yes.

"Yes, that would be nice, I'd like to get my truck and be able to transport myself." He chuckled softly and oh my goodness! This man will be the death of me just by that laugh of his.

Once again, the car ride was really silent; we didn't have much to say to each other. I got my truck, thanked him for the ride, and headed home. The rest of the day I spent telling Alice each and every detail of today and she said she was proud of me; after that, I ate dinner with Jasper and Alice and went to bed so they could have some alone time.

The next day, Alice once again used me as a Barbie doll but it was completely worth it in the end. She dressed me in a fitted but loose blue dress, curled my hair, and put the same minimal make up on me.

"Alright, Bella, today you should talk to him some more; say small things at first but really start talking to him, okay?"

"Okay…" She squealed, patted me on the back, and told me to 'go get my Oreo'.

I reached work much faster in my truck than having to hail a cab and when I got upstairs there was no one there except Edward, in his office.

"Hi, Edward." I smiled while blushing at him. In return, he smiled his crooked smile at me which only made my blush intensify.

"Bella, you're here very early."

"Well, having my own form of transport can do that." He chuckled gently while I bravely went and sat down on his desk with my legs crossed; I swear I heard his breathing hitch.

"So, Edward, is there anything I can do for you?" I cocked my head to the side and looked up at him from under my eyelashes. He gulped visibly and when he spoke his voice was shaky.

"Um, uh, you could—you could just edit these, um, stories, please, now." He closed his eyes as he handed me the files. I giggled a little and left the room. So I do have an affect on him and that just makes me feel a thousand times better. I can't wait to tell Alice that we are starting to break the first layer of his defenses.

The rest of the day and week pretty much went the same way. Alice would dress me up nicely in the morning and I would go to work and do little things that would drive Edward crazy; watching his reactions were best part! He once went speechless when I was wearing a kind of short pencil skirt and bent down to pick up my pen that had fallen accidentally.

Finally, it was Friday! The weekend was coming and I couldn't wait to just relax and stop the Edward sabotage for a while; it was extremely amusing but also tiring because I had to make sure my emotions were on check every single time I was near him. Today, Alice dressed me up in this black button up polo shirt with a navy blue pencil skirt that flowed instead of going down straight, along with the skirt she tacked on a belt to show connection between the skirt and the shirt. Now, all week Alice has been making me wear heels but they were comfortable, walkable heels but today, she 'suggested', more like forced, that I wear black, strappy stilettos. In the end, she got her way and I wore the stupid heels.

Carefully driving and walking into the office, I said hello to Edward and sat down at my desk. All week I had my clumsy moments but I either caught myself or Edward caught me so I was okay but in these heels I have a feeling that I'm going to have a lot more clumsy moments.

"Bella, can you do all of these files for me? I'm sorry I'm giving you so many but our deadline has been moved to next week so we really need to get working." Edward came into the office and dumped 5 files on my desk.

"Oh, it's okay, Edward. You should know by now that I'm always here for you, no matter what." I looked up at him and hoped that he understood the double meaning in my words. Just like the rest of the week, today was no different in work. As always now, Edward gave me special treatment even though I had asked him not to, I did work, Edward took me out to lunch, we came back and did more work, and then it was the end of the day. But the problem with today was that we had a whole lot of extra work to do. As Edward had said before, since the deadline for publishing was moved to next week, us editors had a lot of extra work to do; which basically means, Edward and I were going to be staying late, at the office, all alone, just the two of us. Oh joy. I called Alice and told her what was up and why I had to cancel our movie date, in reply she squealed and told me to 'enjoy'. Wow, I can just imagine all of the thoughts she could be having.

"Bella, I'm sorry I'm ruining your Friday night but we really need to get this work done." He really did look sorry but he has no need to be.

"Oh, it's okay Edward, I cancelled my date already do no biggy." At this, his eyes widened and he looked angry and hurt.

"You had a date?" Uh-oh, he thinks I mean the real date sort of thing, he should know that I would never do something like that.

"Not a real date but my movie date with Alice; we were planning on having a chick flick movie marathon sleep over extravaganza as she puts it." He seemed to breathe easier when he found out that it was with Alice and not some boy.

"That's good, I mean, I'm sorry that you had to cancel that. She wasn't too upset, was she?"

"No, no, she understands that work is important." I smiled at him only to receive his stunning crooked smile in return.

"Here, why don't you start sorting through all of these files and I'll order us some dinner." Currently, we were both situated in Edward's office with stacks and stacks of files surrounding us that needed to be sorted and some of them edited; this was definitely going to cut into dinner time so I agreed with him.

"Oh, Bella you want Portobello mushroom ravioli, right?" I smiled and nodded; he remembered my favorite Italian dish.

While the food was coming, we decided to just do some silent work; we both sat down on opposites sides of his desk and worked on each file. Half an hour later, the food was delivered, Edward paid for it without even listening to my argument, and we ate while talking lightly about work. Edward and I didn't really have anything to say to each other outside of the work realm without it getting too awkward so we usually only discussed work. After we were finished, I took out excess trash and went to go throw it away; on my way back, my clumsiness kicked in and along with these heels I tripped and fell before Edward could catch me.

"Ow!" Stabbing pain spiraled through my left ankle as tears started to fall.

"Bella, darling, are you okay? I'm sorry I couldn't catch you in time, what hurts?" Edward rushed to me, picked me up, and placed me on the couch.

"Edward, my ankle, it really hurts!" The tears continued to fall as Edward gently elevated my left ankle and tried to soothe me.

"Shh, love, it'll be okay. Come on, I'm going to take you to the hospital." Before I could even say anything, Edward lifted me up and started carrying me downstairs. As he was walking to his car I was protesting;

"Edward, I don't need the hospital! Maybe just an icepack but we don't need to make a big fuss over it!" At that, he looked down at me seeing as how he placed me in the passenger seat of his Volvo.

"Love, even the slightest pain to you deserves to be fussed over. I'm not a doctor so I don't know if you just fractured, twisted, or completely broke your ankle so I'm taking you to the hospital to have it checked. Did Alice make you wear those heels?" I nodded mutely because I was still in awe of what he just said. "Ugh, I have to talk to that girl and tell her not to give you shoes that you'll easily trip and fall in." He kissed me on the forehead and went to sit in the driver's seat. Am I dreaming or did he really just say that? The surging pain through my ankle answered that question; I'm definitely awake.

Nearing the hospital, Edward was driving past the alleyway in which he broke up with me in and I was staring at it as if to remove what happened there when I noticed a little something moving there; it looked like a child.

"Stop the car!" At my frantic scream, Edward slammed on the breaks and we immediately stopped; luckily there are no other cars around here.

"Bella, what—

I know I saw a child in that alleyway so ignoring the pain in my ankle I ran out barefoot into the alleyway to see if what I saw was real or not.

"Bella, love, stop! You're going to hurt yourself!" Edward was running after me but I was already in the alleyway. Finally, he caught up to me, and spoke:

"Love, what are you doing?! You could have tripped and hurt yourself, what's wrong? You look like you've seen a ghost!" He kept me tightly in his embrace while my eyes continued to search the alleyway. Then, before anyone could say any more, we heard it. A baby was crying. Both of us stopped breathing and looked at each other.

"Did you just hear that?" He whispered and I nodded. We looked around the alley a little until I saw it. Sitting in a white bundle under a newspaper was a baby girl. She had brown, curly hair and a beautiful face but she was crying.

"Shh, shh, don't cry." I knelt down on the ground and tried to soothe her but oddly enough, just by the sound of my voice she started to calm down. I touched her cheek softly in an attempt to comfort her a little. Edward thought it would be a better idea to pick her up and when his hands were near the baby girl and little boy jumped out from behind a dumpster.

"Don't touch her!" The little boy also had brown hair, his was straight, and he had brown colored eyes; he seemed to want to stand up to Edward.

"What?" Edward looked confused while the little boy appeared extremely angry.

"I said, don't touch her! She's my sister and I won't let you hurt her!"

"He's not going to hurt her; we want to help her because she was crying. Why are you here?" The little boy turned to me and his facial features smoothed out immediately and he looked like he wanted to cry. He came running into my arms and sobbed.

"Aww, shh, shh, it's okay, whatever the problem is I'll take care of it, okay? I'm going to make it all better." The little boy seemed to believe me because he started calming down and in hiccups started talking.

"My name is Shiloh and this is my sister Amelia." I smiled at him and so did Edward but Shiloh only glared back at Edward. Why does he hate Edward?

"Well, Shiloh, my name is Bella and this is Edward." Again, Shiloh glared at Edward while hugging me tighter.

"Shiloh?"

"Mhmm?"

"Can I ask you a question?"

"Of course, Bella!" He seemed to cheer up all of a sudden.

"Why don't you like Edward and why can't he touch Amelia?" Shiloh looked really uncomfortable when I asked that but he answered me by whispering in my ear.

"Because, Bella, I don't trust Edward. He'll hurt me and Amelia but I trust you, Bella."

"Why don't you trust Edward?" Again, Shiloh looked really uncomfortable answering but he did so and this time out loud.

"I don't trust Edward because he's a man just like Daddy and he'll hurt me! Mommy used to tell me not to trust strangers but you seem exactly like mommy so I know I can trust you." I saw from my peripheral vision that Edward froze at Shiloh's words.

"What do you mean 'used to say', Shiloh, where's your mommy?" At this, Shiloh started tearing up again.

"He took her! I know he did! Daddy says that mommy went away but she loved me and Amelia, I know what really happened! Daddy did something to her and she's gone! Mommy won't ever come back, Bella! But I'm going to look for her! That's why I'm here, you know. I come here with Amelia every night so Daddy can't hurt us!" My heart broke at the Shiloh's story while Edward remained frozen. It was as if he was looking at a mini-me, what happened to Edward is similarly happening to his boy.

**I hope I didn't leave off on too big of a cliffy…as I was saying before since break ends really soon, I think this is my last update. My next update after this one will probably be sometime around Christmas so not too long but yea…if I get a mind-blowing response for this chapter, I might just update again tomorrow if I have the time!! I hope you liked this chapter!! =]]**


	16. My Life Sucks Without You

**Hey all, I am sooooo sorry I have been the worst updater in the history of the universe!!! I promise you that I am definitely NOT done with this story or giving up on it! This is the rest of chapter 16 and chapter 17 is on its way!! =] If you're looking for an excuse for my bad updating it's just tat I have SOO many tests and midterms and essays to do for school; no one ever said high school was easy =[ but anyways, again please forgive me but here is the chapter and I hope you enjoy it! =]**

**Chapter 16: My Life Sucks Without You**

**BPOV**

I rapidly gazed back and forth between Edward and Shiloh; both had slightly pained expressions on their faces. Then, tears pooled in Shiloh's eyes as he must have been thinking about the horrible memories that are permanently etched into his brain.

"Aww, Shiloh, baby come here." I took him into my arms where he just cried further while Edward regarded Shiloh in shock. After a couple more minutes of that, I held Shiloh arm's length apart and looked deeply into his eyes.

"Listen, I am going to take you home with me tonight and I'm going to make sure that your father will never ever hurt you. Understand? You're going to be all safe with me, is that okay, Shiloh?" I saw his hesitance and replied quickly; "Of course, your sister will be with us, I won't have it any other way." He smiled a huge smile at that and I couldn't help but smile back; and at my smile, I saw that Edward's facial expression softened the slightest. He does still love me madly and damn it I am going to make him realize this.

"Edward, could we go to, um, your apartment?" I don't want to take Shiloh and Amelia to Alice's because that is just another burden on her and there is no room, in Edward's apartment, however, there is a spare bedroom. Edward turned his face to me, well actually he was already looking in my direction but nonetheless he pretended to turn and face me, and nodded his head.

"Definitely, they can stay in _our_ apartment but first we have to get your ankle checked." Amazing how this man can still worry about me when we have these two helpless children with us and notice how he stressed _our _when naming theapartment.

"I don't need my ankle checked out; it's fine Edward, besides we have to take care of—

"What's wrong with Bella's ankle?" Shiloh appeared just as worried as Edward did; great, now I'm going to have two overprotective guys on my case. I looked at Shiloh calmly and told him there was nothing wrong with my ankle; Edward, on the other hand, shared a different opinion.

"She twisted her ankle so I was taking her to the hospital." This time Shiloh looked at Edward in shock.

"You were going to make her boo-boo feel better?" Edward smiled back gently and nodded his head.

"Of course, Shiloh, I love Bella and I will do everything possible to make sure she has a good life." I noticed how Edward was speaking both to Shiloh and me but before I could dignify his statement with a response, Amelia started wailing again. Carefully, I picked her up and started rocking her back and forth.

"Edward, it's obviously not the time to worry about me, we can go back to our, I mean, the apartment and just put some ice on my ankle; meanwhile, we need to get Amelia cleaned up and into a fresh, comfy bed so she can sleep and Shiloh needs to get cleaned up too." I was whispering, seeing as how Amelia was nodding off to sleep in my arms. Reluctantly, both Shiloh and Edward had to agree with me and we set off toward Edward's car.

We got inside and I made sure that Shiloh was properly buckled up and Amelia was safely tucked away in my arms before I told Edward to start driving. The ride back to the apartment was silent except for my crooning to Amelia. Whenever I did so, Shiloh looked at me with amazement and hope while Edward regarded me with this weird emotion I couldn't quite place. After finally reaching the apartment, Amelia was asleep and Shiloh looked as though he was just about fast asleep too. I guess it was pretty late for them to still be up.

"Edward, can you get Shiloh for me?" I whispered over while carrying Amelia up to the apartment door, luckily I still have my spare keys to this place. I saw that Edward gently picked up Shiloh, locked his car, and made his way over to me.

"Do you think we should wake them up to get them clean?" Hmm, this might turn difficult. I don't want to ruin the lovely dreams they must be having but I don't want them to catch something with the dirt that is all over them; in the end, I told Edward that we could slightly arouse Shiloh but I could just lightly wash up Amelia.

After having done so, we placed them both on the same bed, with Shiloh in one of Edward's old shirts and Amelia in one of mine. I guess it is a good thing that Alice didn't clear out my closet from here.

Slowly, Edward and I made our way back to the living room and plumped down on the couch. Suddenly, everything that's been happening came rushing to me; huh, I knew I couldn't get away from bitter cold reality.

"Bella, come here." I raised an eyebrow at Edward's command, he never usually commands me to do anything. He sighed and said again for me to come over to him. With great lassitude, I trudged over to him.

"What is it?" He pulled me onto his lap and kissed my forehead and cheek soothingly.

"You must be under tremendous amount of stress over Shiloh, Amelia, and…everything else. I'm sorry, Bella." Those words ignited a never-ending hope within me.

"If you're so sorry, then prove it." Edward looked back at me in confusion.

"Get back together with me." I knew that as soon as I said it or even thought it, really, that he would be shaking his head 'no'.

"Why the hell not? Edward you keep saying that you love me and care for me yet your actions show me something different." Exasperation and anger was settling into me; I'm just so sick of this type of Edward, why does he not understand that I need him in my life?

"Bella, you still don't understand; I do care for you and love you deeply but I cannot allow you to be in such a morbid life as mine. You deserve something better and I'm going to make sure that you get it."

"How can you say that? What if I only want you? How can you decide what is best for me? You don't need to be so damn noble, Edward. If you truly want me then you can have me! I want you Edward and I refuse to accept anyone that isn't you." I couldn't take it anymore and I fused my lips with his. I've been away from this man for far too long. Surprisingly enough, Edward responded with the same amount of fervor I had; he wanted this just as much as I did but why was he being so stubborn? Our lips continued doing this sort of intricate dance while I leaned back on the couch so that Edward was slightly on top of me. This was getting very intense but I'm perfectly okay with that. As long as I have Edward then everything is okay.

We were still kissing when out of nowhere; Edward pulled away from me and rested his head on mine.

"We can't do this, Bella." I heard defeat and desperation in his voice. He was fighting a losing battle and he knew it; he needed me just as much as I needed him. I kissed him deeply again and it was a while before we pulled apart for the second time. Breathlessly I replied to him;

"Yes we can, Edward. You want it just as much as I do." Once again, I fused my lips with his and he didn't resist me. Both of us continued kissing and kissing until he pulled away from me, again.

"Edward—

"Shhh, darling, please. I love you, I want you but we just can't do this. I can't do this to you; haven't I explained myself enough? You need someone better than me in your life and I'm going to help you find it. I'll always be here for you, Bella." With that, he kissed my forehead softly, got up, and left the room. A minute later I heard his bedroom door close quietly. My heat stuttered in my chest tightly; this is it, it's done and now no matter what, I won't ever get my Edward back.

Numbly, I got up and left the apartment. This may be dangerous but I don't care right now; limping slightly, I walked through the dark streets. Ignoring my surroundings, staring straight ahead, and wishing for something better. Nothing can change this; Edward's made up his mind and it's a final decision, no changing it. No matter what I do, his mind will never be changed.

I kept walking and walking until; finally, I took a look around at my surroundings; only to realize that I'm back in the park; the park where both Edward and Jacob were running to get to me; the park where I finally gave in and chose Edward; the park where I laid my feelings out. Well, here I am again to come and lay my feelings out; oh, the irony. This time, I won't have Edward to come running after me. This time I'm here to beg for Edward. I'm not here to make a choice; I'm here because I'm finally giving up.

As soon as I thought those words, a stray tear came rolling down my cheek. Yup, that's it, I'm done. No matter what I promised myself and to Alice, it can never come true. Edward has made up his mind and it's final; he does not want me in his life no matter how much he claims otherwise. Actions speak more than words and his actions have showed me how much he truly _doesn't_ want me.

So, I guess it is time that I force my weak and bruised heart to accept this. I'll go get Shiloh and Amelia in the morning and stay with Alice until I get my own place. Of course, I will have to find a new job; I have to remove myself from Edward's life. It's the only way.

Alice is going to pretty upset over this; I saw how she was mad at Edward and then how much she wanted this stupid plan to work. But that's just it: this plan was stupid. Edward can say that he loves me but, please, he's just being a good guy, he always has been. I think that he did love me once but like all the other things in his life; he's feeling that he has to let me go.

For some idiotic reason, he does not understand that I am here to stay and I won't leave like everyone else. I guess all his life there's just been someone who's loved him and left; a pattern he's grown used to. The person will love and then leave. I wish there was something I could do to convince him otherwise, but I've tried everything there is. I've made him jealous, I've made him aroused, and I've tried seducing him but nothing's worked!

The wind blew fiercely, whipping my hair in all directions. I took this moment of reprieve to look around at my current surroundings. Central park appeared ominous and dark; makes sense seeing as how it is probably around 11'o clock to midnight by now. The trees swayed side to side and seemed to pierce me with a ferocious glare. I shivered and pulled my arms closer to my chest. It was almost pitch black. Suddenly, a man in black rags wrapped all over him came and sat right next to me on the park bench.

Okay, maybe it wasn't such a good idea being a girl and walking out in the streets at midnight.

**EPOV**

I cannot believe how much of an asshole I am. The one girl who truly cares for me, who seems to be a constant in my life and I can't have her. My screwed up life just won't allow it; she's so pure and I'm so dark and dreary and dead. She needs a man who will be able to care for her honestly. Who won't be wrapped up in his own past, a past that hasn't even been fully unraveled. And she was actually trying to appeal to me throughout this week; huh, as if I don't want her enough already. I wish she could just understand where I am coming from; it's not that I _don't_ want her; it's that I _can't_ have her. She needs stability in her life because she is just as broken as I am; okay, maybe not as much as me but she is broken inside, she has had a difficult life. She needs someone stable and I just can't provide her with that stability.

Heck, I don't even have all the pieces of my past; I continue to find more and more of what's happened in my life almost everyday. Bella, she's so beatific that she needs someone who can give her all she wants. And not just in material possessions, I can give her those but a full, beating heart. I can give Bella my heart but it's broken and it's black. My heart is filled with grief and the only solace in my black heart is her love and the love I have for her.

I lay on my bed just staring up at the ceiling as thoughts of this week and what was about to happen a couple minutes ago flashed through my mind. Bella is much too attractive for her own good, for my own good; I cannot possibly resist her for long. Ugh, if she continues this 'seducing Edward' binge, I swear I will break down crying. After all, I am a man and I am still attracted to Bella like Oreos with milk.

Wait, no, I can't think like this about Bella. It's like blasphemy and masochism all in one. Thinking of all the ways I could have Bella is just torturing my poor mind because I can't have her and that's where blasphemy comes in. My actions say different than what my heart is telling me. I need that girl with chocolate, doe like eyes but I can't have her because I don't deserve her. I know, predictable to think in such a manner but it's the truth!

If I could just figure out a proper way to explain this to her without her thinking that I don't want her because, believe me, that is far from the truth; I have never wanted anyone as much as I have with Bella. If I could just somehow tell her how much I care for her without her thinking that we should get back together because it won't work out. Sooner or later Bella will tire of this life; this life filled with gaps and breaks, a life that isn't filled with happy memories. How badly I wish I could give her that; a life with a perfect house with a white picket fence but I can't. The word 'perfect' is practically out of my vocabulary; nothing that I have done has ever been perfect.

Tugging at my hair again, I got up and went into the spare bedroom where Shiloh and Amelia lay down. Shiloh and Amelia were both sleeping on the same bed and he had one of his arms around his sister; funny, he's still subconsciously protecting her from the dangers of dreamland. I felt a pull at my heart just looking at them; honestly, I could really relate to what they're going through. More so Shiloh since he's the one truly experiencing it; just the thought of their father makes my blood boil. How can a man harm his own children?! Especially since they're so young! At least with Edward Sr. he wasn't my real father so that hardly mattered but with their father, how could he abuse them so?!

I'm going to do everything possible to make sure that no harm will ever come to these two, poor children again. Once again, I pulled my hair and sighed in frustration.

I went out into the living room to go see if Bella was still there; I shouldn't have just left the room like that. I should, ugh, I don't know! But, I just, I guess I should apologize for my behavior, do something! When I went out, she wasn't there. My heart rate quickened, where could she be?! Wait, no, she's probably asleep. I've kept her awake long enough, haven't I?

So in an attempt to soothe my anxious mind, I went to Bella's bedroom to see if she was there, but her bed was empty. The room looked as if nobody has touched it since last month! Where is she?! Oh God, this is all my fault! She's run away because of me! Ugh, in my anger I punched the wall only to have a slight dent in the wall and an aching pain in my right fist. Suddenly the phone rang, interrupting my soon to come worries about Bella's well being. Oh my God, how is she doing? How could she just run out in the streets at this time of night? What if someone kidnapped her? What if she tripped and hurt herself? What if someone else hurt her? The phone ringing brought me out of my reverie and I picked it up, maybe it's her! How could I have been so stupid? It probably is her.

"Edward, where the HELL is Bella?! You idiot, what happened?!" Of course, it was Alice with another phone call reminding me of my stupidity and all the mistakes I've made.

"I—I didn't do anything, Alice! I have no idea where she is because she just left! I didn't even know. I'm so sorry." My voice broke at the end as dry sobs took over my body. She's a woman out alone in New York at night; chances are nothing bad can happen to her, right? Oh, Fuck! How could she have been so stupid? I should have stayed here with her, I should have attempted to explain, oh, I don't know!

"Edward! Snap out of it! Now is not the time to blame yourself, we have to think about Bella." How did she know I was blaming myself? Oh, right, stupid pixie.

"What are we going to do? Alice, I don't know where she could have gone! She was upset, I assume—

"Wait! She was upset? Why was she upset, Edward?" The calm tone in Alice's voice scared the hell out of me, but I explained to Alice everything that happened and she listened quietly. And when I finished, the line on the other end was still silent. Alice is actually quiet and it's scaring the hell out of me.

"Edward Anthony Masen Cullen! How the hell could you have let this happen?! Don't you know by now that she is head over fucking heel in love with your sorry ass?! You idiot, you love her too so what is your problem?!" Alice continued ranting and she was so loud that I had to pull the phone away from my ear. After a couple more minutes of Alice's lovely voice, I just heard her gasping for air on the other end.

"Umm, Mr. Edward?" Whoa, that's a new voice. I turned around to see Shiloh staring up at me sleepily and innocently frightened. Oh God, all the shouting must have woken him up! Ugh, I can't even take care of these two poor children. Luckily, Amelia didn't wake up too. I bent down so I was face to face with Shiloh.

"Yes, Shiloh?" I looked into his poor innocent eyes.

"Where's Bella?" I shut my eyes tightly and sighed; how am I to explain this to him? He's already afraid of me and with good reason and now that Bella isn't here, I don't think he's going to be very happy being alone with me.

"Shiloh, uh, sometimes people need to think about things. And so they have to go to their quiet place to think so, um, Bella decided that she needed some time to think to herself so she went to her quiet place. She'll be back by the morning, I promise." My rugged explanation didn't ease him one bit because the next moment I find him punching every inch of my body he could reach.

"You did something to her! She's gone because of you! Just like daddy did with mommy!" Tears spewed through his body as he attempted to bring harm to me. What am I supposed to say to him? It is my fault that Bella left but he thinks I actually harmed her. Psh, as if I could ever harm her physically. I'm just the devil that's killed her emotionally. Alice's voice rang through the room as she screamed 'stop' at Shiloh.

"Edward, put the phone on speaker phone, I want to talk to Shiloh." He was still trying to harm me but I reached over and pressed the speaker button; immediately after, Alice's calm voice reverberated throughout the room.

"Shiloh, sweetie, my name is Alice Brandon and I'm your aunty, okay? Listen, nothing bad happened to Bella so you need to stop hitting Edward." As soon as Alice spoke, Shiloh froze on the spot, eyes wide.

"Alright, Edward and Bella love each other very much but Bella needed time to think some stuff over so that's what she's doing. Now the only problem is that we don't know where she is. But what I want you to do, Shiloh, is that I want you to go back to bed and sleep. You are way too young to be up at this time of night. Do you hear me?" Alice's voice was slightly stern at the end but she talked to Shiloh like a mother to child. Why are all women so good with children? It's not fair.

I wonder where Bella could have gone, why would she leave at this time of night alone? She should have asked me for a ride or, if not me, she should have woken Emmett or Jasper up. I'm sure they would have been happy to accompany her where she wanted to go to think; they might have even helped her when I can't.

"No! If Bella is lost, then I want to help find her! She said she'd be my new mommy now and I can't sleep if she's lost! I don't want her to be gone just like my mommy is." Against his will, I took Shiloh into my arms and soothingly rubbed his back.

"Listen, Shiloh, sweetie you're too young to go around the city at this time of night. Tell you what, I'm going to come over and sit with you while Edward and my boyfriend Jasper are going to go out and look for Bella. Is that okay?" Shiloh looked at me skeptically but told Alice 'okay'. After that, I said goodbye to Alice and turned to see Shiloh piercing me with a stare.

"How can I be so sure that you're going to do all you can to find Bella?" If not for the fact that Bella was lost, I would have laughed at this kid's inquiry.

"Shiloh, I will do _everything_ in my ability to find my wife. I love her and I will always love her. I cannot live without her; I hope that's proof enough for you." He gasped at my statement.

"Your wife? Like a mommy and a daddy?" I smiled lightly and nodded my head.

"So if Bella became my mommy then you'd be my new daddy?"

"Um, I guess but only if you want me to. I don't want to push or force you to do anything. Now let's tuck you into bed while Alice is getting here and I promise to wake you up as soon as she gets here, okay?" He looked at me again with doubt in his eyes.

"You really love Bella?" I nodded my head and then he gasped.

"Wait, you're going to tuck me into bed?" I nodded my head again, is there something wrong with that? Isn't that what adults are supposed to do?

"Then I want you to be my daddy!" Shiloh ran screaming into my arms, surprising the heck out of me but I'm not going to turn down this offer. I smiled and laughed at his enthusiasm.

I tucked him into bed and kissed him on the forehead which just brought on another round of hugs and 'I have a new daddy' from Shiloh. I smiled at his boy nature; I'm just glad that he hasn't completely lost his innocence as a child. I also smiled at the fact that he found a safe harbor in myself and Bella; I'm going to do everything I can to protect these children and my Bella. If only I could somehow protect them from myself.

I hope you liked it!! I'm really not sure…I will definitely try to update asap, probably around President's weekend or something, so that's February 12-14, maybe as a special valentine's day chapter or something, hahaha, idk…just please tell me none of you have given up on this story cuz I know that I'm not going to…Hope the new year has been going well for y'all!! I know that last update I was talking about making a facebook just for fanfiction so I have!!! As weird as this may seem, my facebook name is Lovsummergirl Summerlover and I'm pretty sure no one else has a name like tat…sooo just add me if you'd like and put in the little message tat you're from fanfic, so yea…=]] 


	17. You don't know, you don't know

**Hey all, I apologize for being the world's worst updater but again, my only real excuse is school. As I was writing this chapter, I came to realize that this is it. I'm sorry to inform you but I think this may be the last chapter, even though it is kinda short. It may not be the last chapter, I don't know yet it feels like one but idk, you guys tell me. I feel like I'm just stringing the story along and it's time to start a new one…anyways, enjoy! :)**

**Chapter 17: You Don't Know, you don't know…how much I Love You**

**BPOV**

The man scooted a little closer but I couldn't see his face from under the hood of his wrap around sheet. Okay, Bella, calm yourself. You're in a park, psh; he can't do anything to you in a park. It's a public place! But this is nighttime and there's no one else around…

"You know, a pretty lady like yourself shouldn't be roaming around the streets at night, especially around this city." The man spoke and that just made me even queasier, so I wrapped my arms around myself and scooted further away from him.

"Are you scared of me?" The man spoke again in the same gruff tone; wait, I know that voice!

"Billy?!" The man pulled his wrap-around off of his head and smiled at me; it was Billy! He smiled jovially and said,

"Of course, who did you think I was?" I smiled and went to hug him; over the past week I went to visit him a couple times and got to know him a little.

"You just gave me the worst fright, you know. Anyways, what are you doing here? Aren't you supposed to be in the hospital?" Worry enveloped me, he's sick so he should be in the hospital, recovering from a 'could-have-been' deadly heart attack. In reply, he just laughs whole-heartedly.

"Ah, Bella you won't understand the needs of an old man. I've lived my life and worked my hardest, now it's just time for me to enjoy. Not be stuck in some hospital bed." He glances at me through the corner of his eyes and smiles. I look at him with what must be slight horror. I mean, is he really saying what I think he's saying?

"Billy, you aren't going to, I mean, the doctors said you were fine and all you needed was bed rest. Honestly, you can't possible be—

"Bella, Bella, Bella, calm down. I am perfectly healthy but I said, I just want to enjoy my life from now on. Anyways, it's not me we're here to talk about; I didn't follow your crying self all the way out here for nothing. What's wrong?" What's wrong? Hmm, I think of a couple things but I can't completely answer this question. _Everything_ is wrong in my life. I wish I could just go back and change everything, go back to being in love with Edward and that being enough. I wish that my love was enough to cure him of all of his problems. I wish there were no more secrets. I wish there was no more pain.

"Hey, look now you're crying again! Come on, tell this old man what the problem is and I promise that I will do anything to fix it." Billy gazed softly in to my eyes, like a father to his daughter. I didn't realize there were tears coming from my eyes but Billy wiped them away gently.

"I don't know, Billy. It seems like everything is wrong. I don't know what to do. I love Edward but I'm starting to wonder if he truly feels that way with me. I mean I know that he cares for me but is he irrevocably in love with me as I am with him? Why can't he tell me that he doesn't love me anymore? Why is he stringing me along? Why is he acting this way if he does love me?" More tears slipped out; seems like that's all I can do these days: cry and cry and cry some more. I guess I definitely put a new twist into 'cry me a river'.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, slow down there! Now what on earth are you talking about? If I know my son Edward, he is madly in love with you. What being on earth is making you doubt that? Is there a story behind this outburst?" He looked at me knowingly, as if he could read my thoughts. I sighed sadly and turned the other way.

"It's a long story; you wouldn't want to hear it." He turned my face back in his direction and swept his hand all around our heads, pointing out to the world in front of us as he spoke.

"Well, looks like we got all the time in world." I sighed again and proceeded to tell Billy the entire history of Edward and me. All the way starting from before we got married. The whole entire time, he listened carefully without uttering a single word, he just listened. And when I was finally done, he sighed like I did before.

"Bella, all I can say is that you two honestly love each other and I am truly sorry for coming in the way of that. If I had only stayed with Elizabeth when I had the chance, if I had been a better father, then none of this would be happening. You would be living your fairytale life. I'm sorry."

"It's not your fault! Please don't think that, it's not your fault. In all honesty, I think everyone has a hand in everything. Little decisions you make effect everything around you." He looked at me apologetically and sadly.

"But I wish I could rectify this situation."

"Well, wishing for something isn't always good enough. Sometimes we have to go out there and make it better…Wait; I think I figured this out!"

"What is it?"

"I know what I'm supposed to do, Billy!" He smiled and indulged me on my little epiphany.

"What, my dear Bella?"

"I'm just supposed to love him, to never give up. Because if I show I've given up then all hope is gone. He's my love and now I have to fight for what we have!" Billy smiled again but this time he gave me a melancholy smile.

"What if it's too late? What if fighting for your love isn't good enough? What if your love isn't good enough?"

"Well, that's just a chance you have to be willing to make. You have to be willing to put your heart on the line for love. You have to be willing to hope that your love _is _good enough." I knew we weren't just talking about me and Edward now. Billy was madly in love with Elizabeth still and it was obvious.

"Bella, thank you, I don't quite understand this reasoning or how this makes sense logically but you have given me hope."

"No, Billy I have to thank you for making me see that there is hope, it's never gone. And the only thing that can truly make you give up is your own faith." I smiled because I finally realized what I haven't been giving Edward. I haven't been showing him my faith, my hope that we will be together. I've only showed him my love but not my determination.

I said goodbye to Billy seeing as how it was getting a little late; the sun was ready to rise already! I hadn't realized but I talked to Billy the entire night and now it was time for him to go back to the hospital and rest for a while, but it's time for me to find Edward and try, try again. I watched Billy walk the opposite direction and slowly, stealthily the sun rose, shining its rays on my face.

I turned around; ready to show Edward how much I love him when I saw him. He was standing there looking at me. A wide smile broke out into my face as I ran to him.

**EPOV**

I don't know how long I stood in the park watching Bella talking with my dad. There was a nagging voice inside my head wanting to make sure they were both alright but it appeared that I was paralyzed. I couldn't move as I watched her. Finally, when she was done conversing with my father and as they parted ways the sun rose and its rays hit her face beautifully. She looked like a goddess and when she turned around my heart stopped for a moment. Her beauty left me breathless.

It was then that I got confirmation of how much I was willing to do anything for this woman. As she ran into my arms, I knew that I would do anything, anything at all for her safety. If not having me was going to keep her safe then I was going to stay away from her. But would that keep my heart safe? Will I be able to part from her? By the strong hold I had around my Bella I knew the answer.

"Edward, I love you." That was it; I kissed the living daylights out of her. I couldn't take it anymore. I can't stay away from her no matter how hard I try. She and I are meant to be but how can I protect her from myself if I can't let her go? As if she could read my mind, she responded to my unspoken question.

"I'm willing to put myself at risk for you. I don't care Edward, how many times must I say this? I don't care! All I know is that I love you and I won't let you leave me ever."

"But what if you leave me? Like you just did, Bella. Right now, I know that I can't let you go but how am I supposed to protect you if you're not here? How can I protect you if you do stay? Bella, there are horrors in my life that I wish for you to never live or see or hear about. I just—

"Edward, for our love that is a risk you have to be willing to make. I'm not going to leave you but will you let _me_ protect _you_? You're the one who's lived a horrible live Edward and obviously you aren't over your past, but honestly who is? Won't you let me help you? United we stand, divided we fall." She gazed up at me with her chocolate eyes and I couldn't say no to her. I know I can't deny her anything anymore. No matter how hard I've tried, I just can't let this woman go.

"Bella, I don't agree with you but I guess I'm willing to try now." Happiness and relief lit up in her eyes. I smiled adoringly at her.

"Let's go home, love."

I grabbed her hand while we walked silently back to my apartment where Alice and Jasper were watching Shiloh and Amelia. Not all of the problems have been solved but I guess with Bella by my side again, we can finally dig our way out.

"Bella Mommy!!!" Shiloh came running to her as soon as we walked inside. She smiled back at him and picked him up.

"Hello, my darling, how have you been? Did you sleep okay?" Bella acted just like a mother would act with her son; this woman was amazing. Did she have to continue to give me reasons not to leave her? When I'm trying, and failing, so hard already…

"Mommy, I had a dream about ice cream! And you know Daddy put me to bed when I woke up in the night and everything!" Hmm, seems like Shiloh didn't forget our little conversation. Bella had a cute, confused look on her face.

"Daddy?" Shiloh got more excited and ran over to me; of course, I immediately prepared myself for the attack and picked my little boy up in the air. Wait, my little boy? Looks like I'm getting attached to more and more people.

"Yea, daddy! Edward's my new daddy and you're my new mommy." My glorious wife smiled so fully that I wish I had a camera with me at the moment.

"Hey! Hello? Yea, thanks guys for completely ignoring us! The babysitters, humph, that teaches me to do you guys a favor." I couldn't help but grin at Alice's childlike behavior.

"I'm sorry Alice, but thank you for watching the children while Bella and I were out." She still wouldn't turn back around and Jasper was of no use, he was quietly chuckling in the background.

"Just like it takes two to tango, it takes two to apologize. Humph." This time I laughed at Alice's antics; Bella and Shiloh reciprocated.

"We're very sorry Alice, do you forgive us?" Bella used the blackmail card and put Shiloh's puppy dog face right in front of Alice; who could resist such a face?

"Ugh, you guys don't play fair! Fine, fine, I forgive you guys." This time Alice pouted while everyone else laughed.

"You know what they say, forgiveness is divine." I teased her which caused her to stomp her foot in a childlike manner, making Jasper the mediator. The distant cry of a baby interrupted our cheerful banter and brought us back down slightly.

"That must be Amelia, I'll go get her." Bella placed Shiloh down and went to go get Amelia. With care and speed that I didn't know existed, Bella was able to calm Amelia down enough to go back to sleep. All of us gazed at her in shock.

"What? Why is everyone looking at me?" Her wide eyes showed how she truly didn't understand how amazing she is.

"That was amazing, Bella! It took me and Jasper hours for Amelia to go to sleep!" Alice was back to her hyper self and hugged Bella while being careful of the baby.

"Yea, Bella you don't know how hard it is to deal with Alice and a crying baby!" We all heard the 'hey' and 'oof' before anyone else could react. Alice had smacked Jasper for his 'carelessness' and 'insensitivity', her words, not mine. A phone call came out of nowhere and I went to pick it up. I wonder who would call so early in the morning.

"Hello?"

"Hello, may I speak to a 'Mr. Edward Cullen'? This is the county hospital." My heart rate sped up, what happened?

"Yes, this is he. What's wrong? Did something happen to my father?" The room went silent, even Shiloh.

"No, sir nothing like that. We would like to inform you that your father decided to go out on a nightly stroll and he only just returned. We have checked his vitals and nothing appears to be wrong however, we still feel that it is important we inform you of the situation." My heart rate slowly came back down to normal as I realized it wasn't a life or death situation.

"Thank you for telling me, have a nice day."

"Goodbye, sir." I looked at everyone else and smiled.

"It's nothing, don't worry. They just wanted to tell me that Billy went on a nightly stroll." Bella and I shared a secret smile.

"What?! Does he not understand how delicate his health is? I am going to go have a talk with him right now." Leave it to Alice to 'take control' of everything. She stormed out of the house in her pixie-like fury. I looked at Jasper who mimicked my exasperation and said that he'd defuse her.

I turned back and saw my Bella sitting down with Amelia in sleeping quietly in her lap and Shiloh next to her listening to her tell him a story.

Seeing her sitting there like that sparked something in me. I gazed at her in wonder and amazement; this beautiful woman was mine. She wanted me and no one else. Even after knowing what horrors I've faced in my past she still wanted me and only me. Now I know how much I love her. And I know now that whatever problems ahead, we'll face them together.

**I hoped that was worth the wait, probably not but yea. I know it's a little fluffy and may seem rushed but in truth it was. I'm really stressed over school right now, so I apologize, and can y'all tell me if this is an ending or not? I mean, there will be an epilogue but this feels like an end to this story, idk…I hope you liked it!! =]]**


	18. Thank you!

**Hey guys! I know that it has definitely been a looooong time since my last update and I am so terribly sorry for that! All I can say is that school has taken over my life, literally. I don't think I'll be able to continue writing until after June 18****th****, and I just wanted to inform y'all of that…**

**In the meantime though…throughout this school year I actually have been writing some other personal stuff, not fanfiction. My friends tell me that they're really good but I guess they're okay lol anyways, if you're interested in reading, if you're bored or whatever, just send me a message with your valid e-mail address and I'll e-mail it to you…**

**Thank you SO SO SO much for reading my writing and commenting and reviewing and favoriting me as an author and the story, I love you all SO much for that! You guys really make me smile! :)**


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